Sunday, September 13, 2020

Tumblr Thread On Purple Rhymes Goes Off The Rails


Tumblr has the tendency to well, tumble. And exactly that happened here. What started as an observation on violets turned into a historical rhyme on the concept of purple, which then turned into some well timed and tastefully executed filth. For more Tumblr color nerdery, here's an explanation of why magenta isn't a real color. And for random fun, here are Tumblr gems to keep the day moving.

1.

Text - gallusrostromegalus S aerialsquid Follow satanpositive Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue. feels-for-the-fictional I have been waiting for this post all my life. marzipanandminutiae They are indeed purple, But one thing you've missed: The concept of "purple" Didn't always exist. Some cultures lack names For a color, you see. Hence good old Homer And his "wine-dark sea."

2.

Text - A usage so quaint, A phrasing so old, For verses of romance Is sheer fucking gold. So roses are red. Violets once were called blue. I'm hugely pedantic But what else is new? ineptshieldmaid My friend you're not wrong About Homer's wine-ey sea! Colours are a matter Of cultural contingency; Words are in flux And meanings they drift But the word purple You've given short shrift.

3.

Text - The concept of purple, My friends, is old And refers to a pigment once precious as gold. By crushing up molluscs From the wine-dark sea You make a dye: Imperial decree Meant that in Rome, to wear purpura was a privilege reserved For only the emperor! The word 'purple', for clothes so fancy, Entered English By the ninth century

4.

Text - Why then are voilets Not purple in song? The dye from this mollusc, known for so long Is almost magenta; More red than blue. The concept of purple is old, and yet new. The dye is red, So this might be true: Roses are purple And violets are blue

5.

Text - squeeful While this song makes me merry, Tyrian purple dyes many a hue From magenta to berry And a true purple too. But fun as it is to watch this poetic race The answer is staring you right in the face: Roses are red and violets are blue Because nothing fucking rhymes with purple.

6.

Chef - cryoverkiltmilk GIF by enjoythebits hopelessromanticinspace Hirple - To limp or walk awkwardly Cirple - An old Scots word for the hindquarters of a horse

7.

Text - nobodybetterhavethisoneoriswear "Roses are red, violets are purple, My boner for you has caused me to hirple." My, how ramantic! wouldthatcreationhadformedmeman DYING. I AM DYING. kiranovember Calling theshitpostcalligrapher! We need @theshitpostcalligrapher

8.

Text - theshitpostcalligrapher @kiranovember u better buy this as a commission Imao Roses are red Violets are purple Mybonerfor you has cAuSEd me to hirple

9.

Text - simonalkenmayer This post has evolved. gaymagicianhat I am 100 percent all for every part of this thread. I have laughed loudly and long. Thank you, thou glorious purple-hirple rhyme. Source: katelizabeth

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