Thursday, January 21, 2021

Unlucky Window Cleaners Have to Ride The Wind


Most people wouldn't want to be a high-rise window cleaner for the heights alone. But throw in the helplessness of being thrown around by a windy day? Screw that, man. Hope they've got some changes of pants in that bucket.

Submitted by: (via IVI)

Tagged: scary , wtf , heights , nope , windows , cleaner

Penguin Waddles Off In Wrong Group, Buddy Tries To Retrieve Him


Even penguins are out there failing and getting a little mixed up every now and again. This particular penguin homie decides to waddle on off with the wrong group, and we get to watch his bud try to retrieve him. Pretty adorable stuff right here. 

Submitted by: (via The Southern Barlows)

Shaq Falls On Live TV, It's Wholesome Gold


Shaq is one of the most massive human beings on this planet. Naturally, when the guy completely wipes out on live TV you know you're going to have some wholesome comedy gold on your hands. 

Submitted by: (via RJ1)

Tagged: FAIL , Shaq , ridiculous , live tv , funny , fall

Entitled Folks With Their Bold Demands


It's a nightmare to deal with the type of person who thinks their rightful place is the front of the line. Entitled people with their outlandish demands are an incredible thing to witness. Their lack of self-reflection and complete confidence is truly a modern marvel. You'd hope entitled people with their audacious demands would eventually get the picture, but it's doubtful.

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Rare Insults That Creatively Roasted Folks To Oblivion


The internet's always going to have an endless supply of spicy banter. What melts our icy hearts like none other though is when people take the extra time and effort to ensure that their insults are outside the box. You can usually count on some solid comedy gems from the standard YouTube comments section. Someone's seemingly always ready to stir the pot down there. 

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Text - Some people have resting bitch face, Adam Driver has resting 'Professor of Theology listening to his students present a report on religious symbolism in medieval art that they copied off of Wikipedia' face e adam pictures @driverpictures · 1h

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Font - oh S 4 Awards "Unexpected item in bagging area. It's not unexpected, you digital fuck. You literally just told me what it is. It's right there on the screen. I did the wavy-wave, you did the bleepy-bleep; up until the point where you decided to have an electronic stroke, things were going exactly according to plan. What you mean is that you haven't been programmed right. Don't go putting this on me, like I've somehow gone out of my way to surprise you. Il've got places to be, man. I can't

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Light - Bll vor 1 Jahr Jimmy Fallon is basically like five squirrels operating a human suit 9583 69 vor 11 Monaten Jimmy Fallon has the personality of an anthropomorphic Golden Retriever. vor 1 Monat I would love to see Jimmy Fallon interview Jimmy Fallon. What a show that would be. Just him interrupting himself interrupting himself, laughing forcibly and slapping desk. 185 1

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Microphone - Replies 3 years ago Post Malone has mastered the art of looking rich and homeless at the same time. L 68K 9 目 481

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Games - some of yall is the reason why shampoo has instructions

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Text - Gracie > Not really feeling a date tbh Why not Okay honestly You just seem like the kid who tells the teacher that she forgot to pass out the homework edownbadpatrol

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Colorfulness - You and your Pokémon somehow resemble one another! Garbodor & HP Lv. 54 172/172 Choose a Pokémon.

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Motor vehicle - Replies • 3 hours ago (edited) How come you can catch a cold but you can't catch a hot How come a fly can fly but an elephant can't elephant How come the LEGO set said 12-14 years but I ate it in 13 minutes B 27 回 12 Add a public reply... 2 hours ago how come you had 3 chances and couldnt make 1 funny? It 3

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Font - +. @ceo.of.bedtime Comments 20K I Pinned by Daily Dose Of Internet • 9 hours ago "Someone made a device, that doesn't really accomplish anything." Pretty much what my parents did 凸 28K ア 回 486 486 REPLIES ...

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Text - Neil deGrasse Tyson @neiltyson Since the Universe has no center, you can't be it. 11:21 AM · 14 Aug 20 · TweetDeck 35.2K Retweets and comments 153K Likes

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Text - T YOU MATCHED WITH T ON 12/30/20 You better bring a lot more to the table than just that big forehead Now that's just a goddamn lie bc I don't even HAVE a big forehead Sent Today 20:08 I could fit 8 Oreos on your forehead you're wild

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Motor vehicle - Walmart Comments 2.2K Roger Kristian Agan • 1 day ago He looks like Ron's pet rat from Harry Potter. 3.6K 9 回 23

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Text - Comments 4.4K B 3.4K D 回151 151 REPLIES 2 months ago Harley-Davidson: Converts gasoline into noise without the unwanted byproduct of horsepower. B 707 7 回 37 37 REPLIES

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Text - If you start accelerating in a Honda Civic at 11:58:15pm on New Year's Eve, you'll reach 60mph at exactly midnight

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Text - Why do Brits speak English, an American language, rather than speaking some European language? 00 Answer Follow Request More 8.3k 382 Share Y BEST COMMENTS ▼ American Flavored Imitation • 10d · E. • Please tell me this is a joke, right? He's so dense that light actually bends around him Reply 334 · 10d r/rareinsults

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Lip - bioyslo4 290580 comments etiennenajman O rumor has it she flies away if she blink 6a 12-6

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Un-Fun Facts to Quote Around Respected Colleagues


Knowledge is power, and some weird knowledge has the power to alienate strangers. Knowing how bleak, desolate, painful and precarious the world is can be a lot to handle, but it might make people think you're smart. That's kinda cool, right? Some facts are too sad, which is why it also helps to know wild sex facts to quote during an awkward silence.

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Text - watch_over_me 6 days ago That your brain erases your nose from your vision, until you actively think about it. You nose is obstructing your vision 100% of the time, but your brain interrupts it as useless information, and removes it. When you start thinking about it, or close one eye, you can see your nose again. This might seem harmless until you realize the implications. Your brain, without asking, erases something very real from your awareness. Imagine the possibilities of other things

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Text - hannahkate2850 6 days ago 7 28 S 3 E 12 Sloths only have enough energy for their weekly toilet trip to the jungle floor. If the baby falls from their underside in the trees onto the floor, they choose to preserve their energy and leave it to be eaten.

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Text - mortokes 6 days ago O 3 e 6 3 2 83 There is a (genetic) disease called FOP where your muscles and tissue turn to bone. Often called "human statue disease" Eventually people may have to decide whether they want to become "frozen" in a sitting or flat/standing position.

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Text - barnorth 6 days ago The threat of a deadly bird flu spreading to humans is always there. It takes just a little bit of negligence in screening chickens for this to happen.

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Text - seanprefect 6 days ago O 28 @3 34 E 6 There are 8 unaccounted for American nukes and literally an unknown quantity of missing soviet nukes that range all the way from warheads to suitcase bombs.

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Text - HunterSeparate651 6 days ago 2 3 3 8 Most power outages in the US are caused by squirrels

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Text - hux_square 6 days ago 2 @4 2 The reason dogs love squeaky toys is because they sound like small animals dying

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Text - XEIMerYx 6 days ago 2 When two people kiss they effectively make a 60 ft hose that starts at an anus and ends at an anus. Наpрy kissing!

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Text - Sea_dog123 6 days ago 5 e5 3 2 6 if a hamster gets too stressed, it will eats its kids.

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Text - TheMeta40k 6 days ago 2 2 Why do you think cats like the pspspspsps noise? It sounds like happy rats. An old roommate had pet rats and they would make a happy little chittering noise when content. Sounded a lot like the noise we use to attract cats.

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Text - VeryCriticalCritic 6 days ago · edited 4 days ago 9 e 3 Greifswald Nuclear Power Plant, 1976: The Almost- Chernobyl of East Germany. In short: Due to a short-circuit resulting in a fire, almost all coolant pumps failed. The NY-Times says: "[A] Chernobyl-scale nuclear disaster was prevented only when a single water pump in the emergency cooling system was able to draw off pressurized water heated to high temperature by the "decay heat" left in the reactor's core, thus preventing a meltdown

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Text - MachuPicchu1232 6 days ago · edited 5 days ago 2 2 e 3 2 Spider - Rain (you read that right) is a real and naturally occurring phenomenon.

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Text - ABucketofBeetles 6 days ago O 2 2 23 S 2 3 Horses can't throw up. So if they eat something bad or get a bad gas bubble, they just lay down and die.

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Text - coreyboi66 6 days ago 2 @6 S3 8 4 Quokkas, the worlds happiest animal, will throw their babies at attackers if threatened.

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Text - loryhasreddit 6 days ago 5 e S 2 8 5 The image that most people have of blobfish is based on a misconception. people think that's what they look like all the time but blobfish adapted to live in deep waters, which means the deeper you go, the more water pressurethere is. Their bodies are not meaty like fish but more gelatinous because they adapted to the water pressure. if you accidentally pull them to higher levels but with less water pressure, their bodies don't handle it well bc there'

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Text - No_Skin_Off_My_Shoes 5 days ago 2 2 3 2 A 8 2 You can smell your own lungs. Your brain just filters out the smell.

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Text - Big_Bunned_Nuns 6 days ago e Armadillos can carry leprosy and can pass to humans just by being in proximity. Kind of fits the mood of 2020-2021 one could argue!

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Text - SoulsAndSandals 6 days ago When you get a sunburn, it's actually your cells dying so they don't get tumorous

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Text - AlphaTangoFoxtrt 6 days ago There exist in the world, at this moment, more Juggalos than Polar Bears.

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Text - SmallAndScarred 5 days ago Bus seats are designed so that you cannot tell how dirty they really are.

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Text - Allceleatial 6 days ago A certain type of angler fish reproduce via the Male burrowing into the side of the female, eventually fusing. The Male life is lost in the process.

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Text - jjonesdagreat 6 days ago - edited 5 days ago e There is a non-zero maximum threshold for the amount of cockroach that can be present in ground coffee because it is literally impossible to keep them out entirely

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Text - flowers_are_red 5 days ago Men's belts are the dirtiest item of clothing. Touched after pooping and before washing hands, never washed, and worn daily for years.

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Text - thegallary 5 days ago Between 10 and 20% of US adults are functionally illiterate (this does not mean they can't read or write at alI, but that they cannot comprehend what they are reading at a high enough level to do many basic tasks, like filling out a form). To make matters worse a very large proportion of these people do not realize they have a problem with literacy and self report as being fine at reading and writing.

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Text - Hassan_Gym 6 days ago Your hard earned money loses value everyday.

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