Delusional Writer Wants "The Next Twilight" Edited For Free

Everyone and their mother has had what they thought was a great idea for a book, movie or tv show. A few of us have gone through with writing them. And, gotta say, writing original and groundbreaking works of fiction isn't something that really works out on your first try. In fact there's a good chance that as a writer you'll just end up writing copy for some mindless internet culture/entertainment site. Plus, bullying a random person into editing your work for free on the promise that they "get to witness literary history" is a pretty good indicator that your work sucks. But, hell, watch "The Vampiress of Crapshittia" become an ultra-bestseller next month. Then we can all buy some hats and go eat them.

Contortionist Goes On Mission For Burrito, Leaves Cashier Traumatized

Um, with great power comes great responsibility. One can only begin to imagine what kinds of panicked thoughts must've been racing around this poor cashier's brain. The poor homie probably thought that he'd fallen right onto the set of a horror movie. The context is really what ties this whole situation together. The fact that it was after midnight in a 7-11, and that 7-11 seems to be a universal magnet for the bizarre makes the tale that much more believable. Also, shout out to the contortionist for having no idea why the campus alert about a suspicious individual went out in the first place. 

Tenant Gets Unfair Fine, Pays In 37 Installments

This tenant was just trying to make things more convenient for their neighbors, but management wasn't about that. So naturally, things got very inconvenient for management. Why do people have to power trip anyway? It goes to show that it doesn't take much to throw a satisfying wrench into the gears of the powers that be. For more people standing up against totally stupid fees and fines, here's a guy who got hounded for trivial debt and sent them a dime and here's a guy who mudded himself out of a BS car rental fee.

Entitled Stranger Expects Custom Wedding Order As A Gift

The world's not going to run out of aggressive entitlement any time soon. It seems as if we're destined to continue crossing paths with ignorant walks of life that have deluded themselves into thinking they'll be able to lowball sellers that know way better than to fall for the ridiculous antics. This particular choosy beggar expected a stranger to give them a custom wedding order as a gift. Well, that whole approach didn't work out for them. Check out some more entitled people and their uproarious demands over here. 

Nostalgic Twitter Thread On Wild, Obscure, And Cursed TV Shows

Some of these television programs give off straight up fever dream vibes. Seriously, I'd imagine that some of these shows were aired at very unique times. Maybe during those early hours of the morning where you might find yourself caught in a dreamlike state, unable to fall back asleep, and watching whatever you can find on TV. So, naturally you settle on a promising TV show like Snorks. 

A Quick Crash Course On Scorching Irish Insults

We're big fans of the rare insults over here. You know, those insults that are inventive, cunning, utterly ruthless, and ideal for stowing away in your arsenal for the next time that you're inspired to crush someone's spirit in a way that they've never had their spirits crushed before. As it turns out, Irish insults are pure gold. They could definitely fit well into some creative writing as well, if you're ever on the hunt for ways to spice up that dialogue between characters. Check out some more rare insults that creatively roasted people to oblivion over here. 

Daughter's Twitter Thread Secures Dad New Job At Costco

The internet doesn't have to be all panic-inducing headlines and general news of apocalyptic events looming on a foreboding horizon. No, sometimes we can welcome in a sweet wave of wholesome goodness that uplifts the spirits. In this case, we have a loving daughter who takes it upon herself to tap into the world of Twitter to ultimately end up securing her dad a new gig at Costco. It's pretty cool when perfect strangers come together on the internet to help out other people that in no way will be giving them anything back in return. If you're looking for some more wholesome, check out these wholesome memes to hit the feels button. 

Entitled People and Total Karens Who Graced The World With Their Audacious Behavior

The world has more than its fair share of entitled folks with uproarious demands. There are people out there who believe it's more than fair to charge someone for the opportunity to take care of their kids, There are Karens who are more than willing to call the police over people making the "bleep bloop" sound when they lock their cars or leave a ranting yelp review because they couldn't return a 90% eaten hot dog. It's wild out there. The hypocrisy is palpable, like when thissketchy business got called out and accused a freelancer of being a shyster.

People's Most Incriminating "It's Not What It Looks Like" Moments

Mistaken intent and serious misjudgment can be a real monkey on our backs. Sometimes it feels like we're all working just to prove to other people that we're not horrible creeps, thieves or morons. Most times it's easy to not look like a lascivious rabble-rouser. But sometimes you're caught in a vulnerable position bending over to grab a pen cap and there's just no convincing your coworkers that you weren't just trying to smell your boss's chair. What can you do. Here are some times people proved they weren't the dumb one, or for some more foibles, bold and mistaken customers who were at the wrong store.

13 Ridiculous, Funny, And Bizarre Spotify Playlists

Twitter user @weirdspotify has tapped into something special here. Specifically, we're talking about a Twitter account that's dedicated to featuring a series of ridiculous and highly entertaining Spotify playlists. As it turns out, the world of music contains so many songs that it's relatively easy to put together funny playlists that actually make sense by making use of relevant song titles. Really, at their core, these are art. 

Boyfriend Asks For $5K Loan From Girlfriend, Girlfriend Rejects Request, Boyfriend Gets Upset

Money can complicate an otherwise peaceful relationship very quickly. It sounds like this couple was fairly new in their love affair, but that didn't stop the girl's boyfriend from asking her for a sizable $5K loan. Even though she's clearly well off in terms of what she has saved, it's a pretty bold request to make so early in a relationship. On top of that, the guy didn't take too kindly at all to the rejection. Could be a bit of a red flag situation going on. 

Ultima Online Player Unleashes Nuclear Revenge As Tavern Owner

Many of us can get hopelessly invested in our video game adventures. With a legendary game like Ultima Online it's only a matter of time before you find yourself meticulously planning some kind of devilish act. In this case, we have quite the unforgettable tale about the time a player decided to be the tavern owner that'd ultimately end up unleashing an utterly ruthless nuclear revenge on the game's townspeople. 

Amusement Park Ride Operator Gets Justice On Rude Karen

Is there a lesson here? Maybe something like "don't be miserable to the person controlling the ride." Maybe it's "don't go on rides if you know you hate them." Or maybe there are stories with no actual lessons, and things just happen sometimes. Either way, Karen could have played her cards better. For another episode in the adventures of Karen, here's asecret shopper Karen who was too much of a Karen so she got fired.

Lousy Boss Doesn't Like To Pay Employees, Gets Reported To Labor Board

The professional world has far too many shady bosses that are trying to pull fast ones on employees that they vastly underestimate. There had to have been some kind of morally centered voice echoing with pleas in the back of this guy's brain to just pay his employees like he was supposed to. But alas, no such action occurred. So, the labor board made the very necessary intervention. For another pro revenge tale check out the time that a client tried to screw an employee over by locking out of the system, and then it totally backfired. 

Married People's Unexpected Proposal Stories

The movies have an uncanny knack of convincing people that the whole business of a proposal needs to be nothing short of a theatrical experience worthy of being on the big screen itself. Well, the reality is that there are plenty of proposals out there that defy the status quo, and go way outside the box. Maybe these people's proposals will go on to inspire other romantic people out there to do things just a bit differently. 

Wrong But Delightful Alternate Names Kids Have For Stuff

Let's get it out of the way right now, kids are dumb as rocks and weird as heck. But that doesn't mean that they can't make decent or at least amusing contributions to the world of linguistic foibles. It means they're pretty great at saying things wrong all the time. The fact that kids are dumb, strange people means that they're an excellent resource for "the wrong thing to say."