Friday, May 29, 2020

Forgetful Friend Leaves Mac And Cheese At Home In The Oven


Now THAT was a rollercoaster. The forgetful friend really inspired the panic when they shared that they left the mac and cheese at home, in the oven, with a dog there. Fortunately, said oven was left off. So a solid and ridiculous false alarm. 

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texting - Text - 75% 9:35 PM oo Sprint LTE Messages Details Deb Are you on your way? Yeah I left 45 minutes ago. Should be there in about an hour Got everything? You have the gifts? Yes u turned off the water in the back? Yes christ I'm not dumb what do you think You have the mac n cheese you prepared? OMG OMGOMGOMG!!!!

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texting - Text - you forgot it IT'S IN THE FREAKING OVEN!!!! My dog's there call the fire dept I'm turning around omgomgomg OMG you have to be kidding me! They're on their way!!

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texting - Text - You there? So??! I'm there Are they there? Yeah So?? It was in the oven But I forgot to turn the oven on You have got to be kidding me

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Megachurch Pastor Tries To Justify Lavish Lifestyle


Everything about this is unforgettably uncomfortable. Those eyes are possessed, man. 

Submitted by: (via Inside Edition)

News Reporter Tries To Correct Man's Pronunciation


The news reporter really took that condescending BS to a whole new level. 

Submitted by: (via Going4One)

Man Buys Wife Animal Crossing, Wife Becomes Obsessed


Apparently this man deeply regretted the decision to buy his wife, "Animal Crossing." For anyone familiar with the highly likable game, it is completely understandable that the wife became obsessed with the game. 

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Tumblr Thread: Why Some Places Feel Strange


Ah, yes, this fun and quick Tumblr thread takes a quick look at liminal spaces. You might relate to how they're described as feeling. 

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Band's Revenge for People Who Shout "Freebird"


Before there were memes, there were just running jokes absolutely everyone knew. One such popular concert gag was to demand whoever you were seeing play Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Freebird" which typically clocked in around ten minutes. It's understandable that some bands got sick and tired of the joke. For another band prank story, here's a thread about a guy who drove the Nine Inch Nails' tour manager to insanity.

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Text - u r/ProRevenge · Posted by u/Arrow-111 4 days ago For everyone that yells "Freebird!" at concerts... You know who you are. One of you is at every god damned show. I used to tour with a band, and we had around 200 concerts a year. At least 200 times a year, someone would yell "Freebird!" and laugh like they said something clever. I don't understand why it's funny, and hearing it every day for thousands of shows... yup, still not at all funny.

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Text - So, one day we tried to find out the deal. When the freebird-guy of the day yelled, we invited him on stage to answer a few questions. "Why do you yell Freebird?" "Because it's funny!" "Why is that funny?" *look of confusion and shame* Ok, so we didn't get any answers, but we certainly came up with one. Nobody comes up with ridiculous ideas like a group of 20-somethings who spend 15 hours a day in a van together.

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Text - So we found a 16 minute long version of Freebird and loaded it onto the sampler. The trap was set. Sure enough, someone yelled "Freebird!" at the next show. This time, our lead singer acted really interested. "What's that you say? Freebird? Do you want to hear Freebird?" *the audience cheers loudly* "So, just to be clear, you want us to stop playing our set and instead play Freebird?"

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Text - They cheer again in approval, and now the Freebird guy clearly looks like he's never been so proud of anything he's ever done in his life. We all step to the center of the stage in a very serious-looking huddle. We made it a point to go comically long discussing Freebird, and sometimes we would just talk about movies we liked for a while or make fun of each other's sisters. When we felt like it had gone on long enough (and we were terrible about making jokes go way too long) we all nodded

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Text - While the crowd went absolutely nuts, the singer went to the sampler and like an old man fumbling to use a remote, he found the button and pressed it as anticlimactically as possible. Freebird begins to play, and we all put our instruments down and sit around the table. We sip on pretend tea and browse the newspaper quietly. At first everyone thought it was hilarious, but after a few minutes they started to revolt. Chanting for us to come back and all. We would look at each other in a ver

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Text - "NOO00000!" "You want us to play our stuff again?" "YEEEEEEEAAAAAАННН!!" "Well, what about that guy who yelled Freebird?" "THAT GUY SUCKS!" And then the booing would start for that poor freebird guy. We did this for an entire tour, and it absolutely never got old. I'd like to think that after that year, tens of thousands of people stopped yelling Freebird at every show they go to. At least for me, that makes the world a slightly better place.

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Tweets And Memes About Growing Up With Siblings


These tweets and memes do a fantastic job at reflecting the wonderful rollercoaster of an experience that is having siblings. These might bring back some memories and get the laughs rolling. 

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Text - GROWING UP WITH SIBLINGS BE LIKE... "Come here" "Why?" "Just come here" "No you're gonna hit me"

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Musical instrument - When you've had enough of your brother @mateyouwot NERF

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Organism - McCræ @SamuelAnnis It's been 3 days since I replaced my sisters goldfish with carrot's

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Green - Me: *sees my siblings being quiet and minding their own business* Me to me: hit them

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