Friday, August 7, 2020

Logistician Pulls Fast One On Master Sergeant


Looks like this Master Sergeant got what he deserved. There's something too sweet about a military revenge. It could be the fact that these particular revenges incorporate a nice dose of malicious compliance. For some more military revenge gold check out this Staff Sergeant that micromanaged the logistics department getting a reality check in the best way.

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Text - r/ProRevenge u/MobCurt • 6h + Join Giving away a Master Sergeants golf clubs So many years ago I was a logistician in the United States Marine Corps. My unit was headed overseas on a little mini deployment to Morocco. I was in charge of the logistics in my unit even though I was only a Corporal. This was because first we didn't have a staff sergeant to run the shop and the Sergeants we had were garbage at logistics and got put to work for me.

2.

Text - So anyways we're gearing up to go on this little mini deployment and the Master Sergeant who was going to be the highest ranking enlisted comes over to my office to chat. He starts off being real cool and then eventually asks if he can bring his golf clubs with in one of our containers. I thought to myself that it would be wise to be on his good side since I was only a Corporal and going on a deployment with his company. So l agreed, even though it was against the rules and regulations, h

3.

Text - So anyways we go to Morocco and he has his clubs. No course in sight but he was happy hitting balls so I didn't care. However, then everything changed. His marines didn't request to bring enough materials to build what we were there for. They start saying l'm missing a 20ft container, which doesn't happen to me. So I finally solve the mystery. It turns out they didn't request to bring enough and left the materials behind their office. So here we are in Africa to do a job but we don't have

4.

Text - Anyways, we start heading home and we head back to civilization to a port and we had to clean our gear to go back to the US as per customs and biosecurity. So we are cleaning everything, even tank had to take tanks off their tracks and clean the tracks. It was a pain in the ass, but still a cool experience. The problem however was that the Master Sergeant kept needing to reopen containers that had been finished. Now the problem with this was that we had to have actual US customs agents on

5.

Text - It got to the point where the agents didn't even have any of their own seals left because of how many times we did it. They ended up using mine to reseal. It really made things difficult and it was often for dumb shit. So finally I had it. It was literally the last day we had for cleaning and of course the MSgt wanted something else. So I asked the agents. They were really fed up of it. However, I then asked "do either of you guys golf?" One of them said yes. I said then we need two conta

6.

Text - Anyways, we get back to the states and the ship pulls in with the gear and we got it home no problem. A week later the MSgt comes in my office. He's all buddy buddy again. He then asks where his golf clubs were. I said "my guess is your garage or your closet?" He forces a chuckle and goes "ha ha, ok come on dawg, where's my clubs?" I then said "idk what youre talking about MSgt". He then said "my clubs in the container" | then explained to him that per the department of transportation reg

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Cheesy, Strange, And Funny Tinder Moments


Tinder will always be the place for people to dispense the cheesiest, most shameless, and bold pickup lines that they have readily available at their disposal. Every now and again it seems like folks actually take the app seriously and get somewhere with their matches. More often than not though it's just a ridiculous place to try and get some laughs. 

Check out some more bellyflops, wins, and plain awkward moments from Tinder over here.

1.

Text - Nee YOU MATCHED WITH NEE ON 7/27/20 Man You make a guy want to get down on one Nee Sent

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Text - YOU MATCHED WITH ON 2/27/18 Can you solve a Rubik's cube in less than 12 seconds? No way Okay good neither can I Just wanted to make sure I wouldn't be intimidated by you Haha okay good Okay sweet we're dating now That's how tinder works Or so l'm told Lol ok but I don't think my boyfriend would like that No I'm fine with it Sent

3.

Cartoon - YOU MATCHED WITH ON 7/22/20 Hey girl, you tryna hyuck Sent Plz explain to me wtf that means

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Text - 5:24 ull YOU MATCHED WITH FON 7/24/20 Would a day at my complex's pool make you less bored? Wtf I'm not no inner city kid who needs to go to do some dirty pool Maybe the reason you're bored is because no one wants to be around you Sent

5.

Text - 00000 ROGERS ? 7:14 PM 1 66% YOU MATCHED WITH L Good news. I've never been with a Russian girl, and I love puns. What do you say quit Stalin, and Russian to things? Holy mother of god I think I'm in love. finding it hard to Putin words? I'm lenin towards asking you to netflix and chill Should I Trotsky on over? As long as you don't arrive 15 minutes late with tsarbucks Wouldn't that get me extra Marx?

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Text - く Steve Tue, Mar 5, 5:41PM Have you heard about the latest Spotify glitch? What's that? UNHINGED For some reason, they didn't have you listed as this week's hottest single... Can you believe that? Hmm did you check under "recently played"?

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Text - Today 9:30 PM Hello there I see you must have noticed i'm 6'3" Definitely caught me eye My Good thing you corrected that, I thought you were a pirate for a sec Nah just illiterate Better than being a pirate! I was worried for my booty Might still need to watch out for it Type a message... GIF

8.

Text - < Jess •.. Chat Profile Hahaha definitely Let's do it, I know a place that does great pizzas Yesterday, 18:08 What's that It's like an unfolded calzone Sent Send a message Send

9.

Text - Mathu Today 07:27 Ask me what my favourite subject was at school Today 08:43 What was your favourite subject at school Today 09:16 Math u? Sent

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Text - YOU MATCHED WITH JACOB ON 6/28/20 Hey gorgeous. So what are you fishing for? Jokes, dark humor, and bad pick up lines. I've got some questionable jokes I've made some questionable life choices. You might be the next one. Oooh damn that was clean Yeah, I'm super proud of myself, which is good because my parents sure aren't. Sent

11.

Text - YOU MATCHED WITH HANNAH ON 7/8/20 How do you feel about pandas? Today 12:02 AM Pandas should be extinct and our continued interactions with them in an attempt to delay their unavoidable deaths is doomed to fail. But they are cute Today 2:45 AM Yeah so I think I love you

12.

Text - I'm 11:12 PM you're trumpet What 11:12 PM that's a horn so immmmmm 11:13 PM in a school band 11:17 PM

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Text - YOU MATCHED WITH MERCEDES ON 7/7/20 Here's to hoping we're in Soviet russia Today 5:19 PM Haha why is that? Today 6:28 PM Well cause in US we ride in cars but if we are in Soviet Russia Mercedes would ride me Today 7:17 PM You know, that's the most unique "Mercedes" pick up line l've hear so far Imfaoo

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Face - Annabelle 18 O Graphic designer A Lives in Augusta O 14 miles away Just found out corona doesn't affect objects. Thank God I'm a woman.

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Text - YOU MATCHED WITH ON 2020-06-27 We have a lot in common! Hey I How's it going? So tell me, what are the friction losses in a straight length of pipe of 2m and internal diameter of 2", carrying water at 25*C flowing at a velocity of 4m/s? Today 12:12 PM Mmmm i assumed smooth pipe I and got 1.8 Pa Today 1:29 PM I hope you didn't actually do that "negligible" was also an acceptable answer lol I did hahaha I am committed to fluid mechanics I for life

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Text - Matched with my EX on Tinder, she's a big Friends fan. 季 YOU SUPER LIKED ALICIA ON 08.07.20. CRUNCI HOW YOU DOIN? Sent asshole

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Text - Kasey YOU SUPER LIKED KASEY ON 6/27/20 Tryna be my Minecraft girlfriend and share diamonds? O You'd share your diamonds with me? Anything for you e but you gotta put your bed next to mine Awww well I've got a like for you too hold on Are you a Minecraft fence ? Cause I can't get over you Are you a creeper becuase you make my heart explode Oooh!

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Text - Apple Music or Spotify? Today 15:54 spotify was there a crazy glitch that made me the hottest single this week Today 17:22 No, just figuring out if you're a Neanderthal or not You passed LMAOOO Day 34. The people of tinder are evolving, becoming smarter. They know the expected outcomes of pickup lines. I am still able to receive hearts on my messages, but who knows how long that will last. God help us.

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Product - Thursday 18:38 I know I'm trash, so will you take me out? O Thursday 20:13 Lmaoo good one Friday 00:58 Thank you but you didn't answer my question e Today 20:05 Sure to the dumpster Today 20:21 That's us going for a romantic walk Wtfeee

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Insane Spin On Guy's Double Backflips


Dude turns into Sonic during those backflips. 

Submitted by: (via Bolow Officiel)

Quick and Easy Engine Removal


Removing an engine from a car is a tedious and expensive undertaking. In this case, they went the unconventional route and used a chain, a tree, and the car itself.

Submitted by: (via izzo)

Tagged: wtf , removal , cars , lol , engine , Video

Hilarious Wrong Number Exchanges


Even in this day and age people still manage to get all mixed up and confused, and text/call the wrong number. From there, it's up to the recipient to have as much fun with it as possible. These people certainly did. 

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Photography - there uh pissed @rydotphone A random number just texted me this??? Today 6:48 PM Us later

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Transport - Is this Joe or do I have the wrong number Joe mama Yeah you got the wrong numbwr Sorry 5:51 PM Sent this to the wrong number earlier that guy was kind of a smart ass 28 min Joe mama Now • SMS

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Text - 1 20 People > Text Message Today 11:54 АМ Whats"up https://ift.tt/2PCWVGc Are you trying to scam 20 at once?

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Text - iMessage You've got a wrong number Text Message What is the right one? iMessage No idea but you've got the wrong number

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Grape - 7:06 ll Today 7:05 PM Consider this a fucking warning. Oops sorry wrong person No wait Delivered

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Text - Mouse @WonderfulMousey This is the strangest, most out-of-context wrong number text I've ever had in my entire life. Text Message Today 11:56 AM Priscilla!! You stink like the tuna! Tuna! Everyday!!!

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Product - O Minecraft C1 58% VPN) 4:28 PM Yes, here is the photo you asked for last night at the meeting. I hope you will be attending the next one as well. I know that you are hesitant as accepting shrek as your god, however I think you are worthy. Good times ahead Ah wrong number Nah it's fine

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Text - Dr. Cristina Stasia @CristinaStasia Y'all... this is the best wrong number text l've ever received. Hoping the mule gets the shoes he needs. +1 Text Message Today 7:57 PM Hi Joe! My name is Rebecca, you've been recommended to me by Vanessa to potentially shoe my mule? He's never had shoes, and can be trying with farrier work. But he is a good boy, and seems unbothered by tapping his feet with a hoof pick. 10:24 PM · Aug 2, 2020 58 8 See Dr. Cristina Stasia's other...

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Text - Here is the schedule hey, i think you have the wrong number Then what is your number because I have the 5 that is my number Read 11:36 AM Ok then why did you say I have the wrong number because i'm not...the person you're trying to text Delivered

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Text - Call FaceTime Add Contact iMessage Feb 11, 2013, 1:11 AM I can't believe how cheap green beans are Who is this? And what green beans? Like from the store Delivered What store? Who is this??

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Text - Hey bro what's that cheese you just had at lunch? Running to the store soon and gotta pick that shit up iMessage Oh shit sorry wrong number But I mean really if you have have any cheese recommendations Imk. Fckn love cheese Smoked Gouda Damn man good call. Forgot about that one

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Text - audio FaceTime info Hey bob what kind of wipes do you want Lysol or Clorox Wow. This is a tough decision. At first thought I would say Clorox, but when you really dive deep into this debate you have to take into effect that Clorox only kills 99.9% of germs while Lysol claims to kill 99.99% or germs. In a time as such I think that .09% of a germ could really do some damage. I'm going to have to say Lysol...final answer

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Text - iMessage Today 15:09 Hey Andrew you coming to the potluck on Saturday? Wrong number buddy I'm bring chili I'm bringing* chili I'm bringing chili I'm bringing chili I'm bringing chili Ok I'm bringing chili I'm bringing chili Wrong number I'm bringing chili

14.

Text - Hey baby, it's you doing? what are Hey, sorry, I think you have the wrong number. This isn't Ashly? ? Nope, sorry! ally help. Fuck. I was promised sexting too. I guess 9 inches doesn't actu You know you're telling s literal stranger about your dick right now, so I don't think the 9 inches was the problem tbh.

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Text - Text Message Today 10:14 PM Princess Who is this? Sorry wrong number Come back l'll be your princess We will meet again, in another life I love you I love you too princess bratsquad: I think this is the most romantic thing to ever happen to me

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Text - Saturday, April 14, 2018 We're back in the hospital because Jake set his butthole on fire again. 14:14 you have the wrong number, but PLEASE keep me updated 14:15 omfg Oops sorry! 14:15 no, come back! i wanna hear 14:16 everything

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Text - Sarah Tolcser @SarahTolcser Guys I just received this extremely cryptic text from a wrong number Tell you going on with Victoria just call me and let me know by saint Michael it's a tortilla buy call me back I need to know bye 5:11 PM · Aug 3, 2020 13 8 See Sarah Tolcser's other Twe...

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Text - n @noahaustinpaul this is the funniest wrong number text i've ever gotten Twitter 0oo 4:29 PM e 1 66% IMessage Today 4:28 PM Hi, Christi. It's Helen. I just wanted to let you know that if Brittney EVER pulls another stunt like that against my precious Caitlin again, you WILL be banned from the cul- de-sac barbecue. Brittney's actions were despicable. Of course, she can't help what she learns from her mother. Hugs and Kisses, Helen

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Most Useless Facts People Know


Someone on AskReddit got a thread going about the most useless facts that they ever came across. So many of us are walking around with heads full of trivia tidbits that don't actually serve any purpose in the majority of our lives. Might as well pocket some of these the next time a conversation needs to be spiced up by some random information, or you're trying to win a game of trivia. 

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Text - gack74 • 8h Bees generate electricity because their wings flapping is so fast, they can use this to tell if a flower has been landed on by another bee already due to its electric charge. Bees are electric type Pokémon Reply 563 ...

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Text - Blastspark01 • 8h When a baby panda is first born, it's smaller than a mouse Reply 274 ...

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Text - Stockholm-Syndrom • 8h Your nipples are older than your teeth. Reply 241 ...

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Text - novocarcher • 8h The human head weighs eight pounds Reply 1 49 ...

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Text - rikicuriousity • 8h Look for your deck of cards. Check the 4 kings. While they all look similar, the King of Hearts is the only royal fellow who doesn't have a mustache. Reply 182 ...

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Text - Archbold87 • 5h The common image we have of Neanderthals is hunched over is because the first skeleton reconstructed was from an old male with arthritus. Reply 48 ...

7.

Text - IFischio • 7h You can calculate the temperature by counting how many times a cricket chirps in 15 seconds, then adding 37 for Fahrenheit. For Celsius, add 5 instead, the multiply by 0.5556 (5/9). You'll get an approximation of the temperature! *Works better for Fahrenheit, also for Celsius I just used the standard conversion (subtract 32, multiply by 5/9). Reply 78 ...

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Text - Huegelgrab · 8h Nutella has a sunblock factor of 9.7 but belive you can get that number up by applying a thicker layer Reply 396 ...

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Text - PopeBonifaceVIII • 8h Koala fingerprints are so difficult to distinguish from human fingerprints, they have been mistaken for human prints in a number of crime scene investigations. Reply 207

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Text - AnotherSocialReject_ • 6h Gingers have a higher tolerance for anesthesia than any other hair color, so it often takes more medication to knock them out. Reply 78 ...

11.

Text - leviolentfemme • 7h At birth, baby elephants weigh about 250 pounds, making them the largest babies on earth right after your bitch ass. Reply 1 237 ...

12.

Text - SuzuAkita • 8h When reading data and data you will most likely say it both ways Reply 193 ...

13.

Text - Count-Zero-Records • 7h Serbia is the worlds largest producer and exporter of raspberries. Reply 31 ...

14.

Text - moardownboats • 7h Otters keep food in their armpits. Reply 1 24 + ...

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Text - noface_twoface • 8h Francium is the most explosive element on the periodic table that was originally called actinium k also another useless fact is Abraham Lincoln son was saved by Edwin booth who's siblings with john wilks booth Reply ...

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Text - Saxophone_Richard • 4h Bees go to hives to poop out honey so they're basically living in their own shit Reply ...

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Text - trujace • 8h Polar bears are left handed Reply 68 ...

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Text - Poobeard76 • 7h Every person with a European ancestor has Charlemagne as an ancestor. Because if you go back that far, everyone with European blood has 100 percent of the Europeans of that era with still existing blood lines in their ancestry. Reply 41 ...

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