A Hilariously Bad Elementary School Rendition Of Jingle Bells

Fine, no one expects elementary schoolers to absolutely nail a concert. But also, there's something undeniably funny about the beats, the crowd, the soloist trying to hold it together, and the fact that it sounds like it's being played on a dump truck. Of course, a display like this would have anyone wondering if they themselves sounded like this when they took elementary school music. And honestly, if there's no video evidence, all we can do is search ourselves for half a second, look straight in the mirror, wink and say "no daddy-o, you totally shredded Hot Cross Buns on the recorder."

Sword Box Illusion Defies Laws Of Reality Itself

Magicians and their world of trickery can do a real number on the rational mind's ability to make sense of illusions that simply defy the typical laws of this reality. This magician clearly has to be a vampire that's invulnerable to metal. That's the only explanation. 

Jack Nicklaus Makes Miracle Putt After Johnny Miller Says He Can't Make It

Jack Nicklaus gave off every impression that he had complete and unwavering confidence when it came to sinking that putt. The guy didn't miss a beat from the time he dropped the golf ball (barely set up), and went on to sink the damn thing. It's as if he didn't even think about what he'd do if he missed it. 

Funny Tweets To Mercifully Lift The Unamused Out Of Boredom

Like anyone else, if you sit with your own thoughts for more than 5 minutes, you tend to get scared and upset. With that, we've decided that a constant flow of funny tweets to build character and cultivate strength are a good way to avoid our own horrible thoughts. Seriously our internal monologues sound like a barn fire. Anyway, here are some funny tweets to quote at parties in lieu of having a personality.

Petty Revenges From The World's Pettiest Masterminds

A well executed petty revenge can serve as its own kind of art form. It takes planning, rascality, and enough presence to pull off the dang thing when it all gets down to it. But oh boy, the level of satisfaction that can come from a successful petty revenge is otherworldly. For a moment you very well might feel like you've finally got that fulfillment that your life was otherwise lacking. If you don't take the petty revenge too far, you might actually manage to not be haunted by guilt as well. For some more revenge drama, check out the time that a lunch thief got outed by a coworker's pro revenge.

Dense Choosy Beggar Won't Grasp Meaning Of Rejection

Trying to sell your things or pick up work online is easier said than done. There are unfortunate seas of entitled choosy beggars out there that are all blinded by such dauntingly thick clouds of delusional ignorance that reaching reasonable negotiations is near impossible. This particular choosy beggar clearly wasn't grasping what the guy on the other end of the conversation was trying to get across to him; and that's that the amount of money being offered for the work being provided was in no way going to work out. Check out some more entitled people and their uproarious demands over here.

Boyfriend Expects Girlfriend To Contribute $200 To His Bud's Wedding Gift

It sounds like this guy is in dire need of taking a moment to reassess his expectations of what constitutes a reasonable wedding gift. Or rather, what his girlfriend should contribute. They're clearly in the early stages of their relationship, and he's already out there waving some red flags. Naturally, the moral judges of Reddit's AITA community were in agreement that he was just a tad bit out of line. For another ridiculous post from the realm of wedding gossip, check out this post about a craigslist ad seeking a date for a Karen mother-in-law. 

Tumblr Thread: Ants And Their Fascinating Little Funeral Ritual

We're no strangers to the fact that ants are quite the fascinating bunch of mini beings to exist on this planet. They tirelessly work their asses off to get that bread, day in and day out. And they persist while clumsy gigantor human beings amble around, knocking their belongings all over the place, and carelessly stepping on their brethren. It can't be an easy life. In this Tumblr thread we get to learn a little bit more about the intriguing funeral process that ants enact. If you're looking for some more gold from Tumblr check out this Tumblr thread about becoming an ant god.

Belligerent Customer Claims To Know Owner, Customer Gets Exposed

There are far too many entitled and unreasonable customers out there that try to pull fast ones on well meaning establishments by claiming to know the owners. What these very customers so often forget is that the owners can be quite attentive individuals. In fact, it's not entirely uncommon for owners to make their presence known around the places that they own. We're just glad that this owner was around for a testy customer, and was able to deal with them firsthand. Must've been overpoweringly satisfying to see them set straight after putting up with all of the rude behavior. 

Impressive "Not My Job" Moments From Masters Of Negligence

If only we could all be so inspired to measure once and not even cut, to never read the directions, and treat orders like the suggestions they really are. On that day, we could all truly be free. Free to live in a place where nothing really works as intended. But at least we wouldn't have to try very hard. And that world of "not my job" would be a beautiful one. Yes, the stop signs would face the wrong way and the toilet would drain directly into the downstairs bathtub, but it would be a "not my job" paradise.

Customer Demands Hotter Coffee, Manager Goes Full Throttle

This one honestly makes us a little nostalgic for our times working crazy jobs with people who didn't give a heck. There's a special place in our hearts for people who don't move like silent specters through the cogs of society, but make themselves seen and heard when a customer is being a real stick in the mud, like this boss who used an eye gag to get rid of some problem customers.

Hungry ATM Eats Man's Card, Man Won't Accept The Logical Answer

Life just loves to be difficult and to throw curveballs your way. If it seems like you've found yourself walking on easy street, there's probably that lingering, conditioned feeling bouncing around the back of your brain that it's only a matter of time before some sort of obstacle presents itself. The general best course of action is to take those hurdles as they come, and do what you can to navigate them from as calm and understanding of a place as is possible. 

Unfortunately, this customer let their anger get the best of them. It's very hard to approach a problem from a rational place when the anger's taken the reins. But hey, we're only human after all. It can happen to the very best of us. Plus, it really would suck to realize that you've fallen victim to the old hungry ATM debacle. 

Stupid Proof That Kids Are Almost a Different Species

Kids are dumb as rocks and weird as heck. These people are expected to one day become functioning members of society, but man, junk like this doesn't inspire confidence. Okay, maybe we should cut them a little slack. How much of a chance do you have at understanding reality when everyone in your social world keeps telling you Santa is real? Maybe it's not a mystery as to why kids are so strange and dumb.

Craigslist Ad Seeks Wedding Date For Karen Mother-In-Law, Internet Reacts

It might've been a genius move to have this ad shared to a place like Reddit. While the mother-in-law in question sounds like a bit of a self-centered handful, she also sounds like someone who one might be able to push themselves to put up with for a nice bank account boost. Naturally, the comments section for this Craigslist wanted ad was quite lively. For some more Karen mother-in-law drama check out the time that a Karen mother-in-law used too much salt in her food, and then the petty revenge that ensued. 

Man Pretends To Be Unruly Cat For Vet Training Video

Most of us have endured those moments at work where we've been tasked with infuriatingly mindless, nonsensical tasks that effortlessly make use question the meaning of our existence. It can be exceedingly difficult to just give yourself over to the experience, and make the most out of it. Well, this guy could serve as an inspiration of sorts to all of us. He left it all on the field, and then some, man. I wouldn't be surprised if he thought he was a cat at one point during this Oscarworthy performance.