FunnyWeb - Get Your Funniest Pix From The InterWebz!: 04/28/20

Tuesday, April 28, 2020

Quick Tumblr Thread Is An Australian Rosetta Stone

This ended up being Rosetta Stone for a single language. This quick and funny Tumblr thread takes us on a quick tour of the many ways we can express one thing, when it comes to language/cultural references.

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Text - @gotitforcheap-deactivated201611 if you're american and coming to australia, I'm gonna go ahead and say that you should be 100 percent way more worried about being king hit by a dude named "dane" in a bintang singlet than any fucking spiders that exist here marimopet what does this say in english

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Text - myangelofthelord ok so what does it say in american merinnan "You're more likely to get sucker punched/ cold-cocked by an asshole than you are to be bitten by a spider".

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Text - carryonmy-assbutt thank you you-or-your-memory Well rattle my spoons, that don't make a lick of sense. Wot in tarnation does this hootenanny say?

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Text - flubz ya mosey on by Australia, you best be fixin' to get to some fisticuffs more'n checkin fer "If spiders." operationsc This is a Rosetta Stone for a single language

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Tagged: tumblr , australia , language , ridiculous , culture , funny tumblr

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Binging With Babish: Deadpool's Chimichangas

Now let's just get a video of Ryan Reynolds dressed up as Deadpool, enjoying this wonderful creation.

Submitted by: (via Binging with Babish)

Tagged: deadpool , awesome , superheroes , food , Video , binging with babish

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Man Hacks Into Scammers' Computers And Building's CCTV

Nothing short of a modern day hero. Take that, scammers.

Submitted by: (via Jim Browning)

Tagged: scammer , satisfying , awesome , Video , win

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Man Accidentally Sends Private Message To Whole Company

This guy accidentally sent an email intended for a certain set of eyes, to the whole company. One can only imagine what kind of panic and embarrassment he must've experienced upon the realization that he'd sent the email to a whole lot more people than intended. Oh well. It must've been a good laugh for the rest of the people that got to see it.

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Text - r/tifu + JOIN u/degrudv • 3d 1 1 1 TIFU by sending a "private" message to my whole company. Like many men, this quarantine gave me (a 35yo Male) a good opportunity to grow out a beard. So, I'm on a Sales Department WebEx Call (probably 300 people) and since no one has seen me in about a month, it was

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Text - a bit of a surprise to see me with facial hair. A friend at the company privately messages me through WebEx, "Dude what happened to your face?" I thought it would be funny to reply with "Good News! I finally hit puberty!!!" except that message wasn't private - it went to everyone on the call... like everyone - without any context around it. Just imagine sitting there on a company webex call listening to the SVP of Sales and out of nowhere your coworker sends you a message saying "Good New

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4. Seriously.

Text - jandmboggess2015 • 3d That's funny though. Anyone with a sense of humor would laugh

5. Oh boy.

Text - OkVolume1 • 3d I was one late to a Webex and opened with "Better Late Than Pregnant." Thanks Blanche Devereaux. Took me a minute to realize I (a guy) had just said that out loud.

6. Beautiful.

Text - emailrob • 3d An intern at my old company years ago send an email to his team. Wanted to know who wanted to play football| (soccer) that night. Trouble is, he sent it to the wrong list. 500,000 people

7. Ouch.

Text - Kalmish • 3d A long time ago in the 90s, my father did the same thing. We were both in the army and he sent me a joke email about the stupidity of officers. Unfortunately, that was in the early days of IT in the Canadian military and they hadn't clamped down on who you could and couldn't send it to and somehow the To: address turned into **. It went to the Chief of Defence Staff right on down to the lowest private that had military wan access. He had to sit through several lectures on com

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Tagged: employee , FAIL , accident , oops , ridiculous , tifu , Reddit , company

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Man Cheats On Wife In Car, She Applies Heating Cream To Car Seats

The very definition of getting burned. This husband thought he'd get away with cheating on his wife, but little did he know she'd find out, and do something about it. Oh yes, she proceeded to secretly apply a heating cream to the seats. So, the next time the cheater was out and about with his side chick in that car, a very real burn ensued. Ouch. Good riddance, my dude.

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Text - r/pettyrevenge + JOIN u/pinkfluffyunicorn212 • 6h You better lock your car if you want to cheat in it. First off this is my moms friends story and yes, I asked for permission to post this. So my moms friend, let's call her Anna, was married to a man we'll call cheater, who had a Porsche convertible as his „fun car“. It was his pride and joy and he took care of it like a baby. He always tried to get her to be more enthusiastic about it, but she wasn't into cars.

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Text - At some point she found out he had been cheating on her with a young woman he worked with. Sometimes when the weather was right he would pick her up with the Porsche, they'd drive to the woods and have sex in the car. She found out because the woman told another coworker who was a friend of Anna (which she didn't know), about it and she told Anna. Anna was furious, but didn't want a divorce immediately because their daughter was just 4 months away from finishing school and she didn't want

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Text - Still she wanted revenge. So she bought a very intense heating cream, that gets horrible when it gets warmth. The kind that you better don't use if you want to take a bath later that day. After he went to work on a Friday, she went a head and polished the leather seats of the Porsche with this heating cream. She said they looked really nice and smooth. When he got home she showed him as a surprise and he was so happy that she finally showed interest in the car and told her how good everyt

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Text - leather seats heated up nicely. Unfortunately we don't exactly know what happened when he was gone, we can only guess. But when he came back he was furious, slammed the car door and went straight to shower. Anna said she peaked and saw his back was bright red and did look pretty painful. Of course the shower made it even worse. He never confronted her about it, but since that day he kept the car locked and took the keys with him when he left. She divorced him after her daughter graduated

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Tagged: marriage , satisfying , awesome , relationships , petty , cheating , Reddit

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Laughable Liars That Got Outed Online

Seriously, these liars just keep going around and around, trying to spread their different sentiments of pure fiction. It would seem that as long as the internet is around, we'll have folks trying to get away with weaving their webs of lies, and assuming that someone else out there won't fact check them to oblivion.

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Digital compositing - r/reddeadredemption un• 1h• i.redd.it I was on a mission with Sean and lightning struck near him. This is what he looked after. The amount of mindblowing details in the game never ceases to amaze me!! Meme Gaming Vote 12 1 Share Y BEST COMMENTS ▼ 32m This is his character model when he is hanging upside down from the tree during the mission where you rescue him. There is also no mission after that specific one involving Sean where he wears this outfit.

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Product - 8:02 1 I snapped this picture yesterday in case this guy was going to follow and kill me before realizing his sunglasses were on the back of his head. 183 27 177 1,668 Replying to @ No you didn't. ALL IMAGES VIDEOS NEWS MAPS SHOPPI Latest GIF HD Product Color - Labeled for lady glasses minutes till ifunny sungla Tweet your reply

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Text - • 34 minutes ago Nice video guys 3 Add a public repl... 33 minutes ago Thank you. If you think this is a nice video, we recommend you watch it as well, instead of commenting on it a minute after it has uploaded. We hope you enjoy it.

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Text - ALL forms of mercury are classified as a GENETIC TERMINATOR. Thirrmosal is 49.5% mercury. SD 7 Like · Reply · Message · 1d · Edited ^ Hide 17 Replies |Nope. b 11 Like · Reply · Message · 1d Please, prove me wrong. Like · Reply · Message · 1d

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Text - The Logic of Science Let me try to explain it this way. Sodium is extremely reactive. It literally explodes when it touches water. Chlorine is highly toxic at anything but very low doses. Table salt (aka sodium chloride) is 50% sodium and 50% chlorine. Does that mean that it will explode when it touches water and give you chlorine poisoning? Obviously not. When sodium and chlorine are together, they change each others properties, and neither chemical behaves the way it would by itself. Th

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Text - O'Charley's @OCharleys Replying to and @jimmyfallon We have waffles too, but we've also got pie...does @WaffleHouse have pie? Didn't think so. 10:16 AM · 15 Jan 18 1 Like Waffle House O @WaffleHouse · 12h and @jimmyfallon Replying to @OCharleys Yes. We have pie.

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Text - Hey Hun! Did you see my message above? X T ignored you once already, i don't want to be part of a pyramid scheme, 'hun' Now leave me be. Ok, it's not a pyramid scheme but I will leave you be. Wishing you the best https://ethanvanderbuilt.com/ 2017/06/05/arbonne-sued-for- being-a-pyramid-scheme/ ARBONNE. Arbonne Sued For Being A Pyramid Scheme - Ethan Vanderbuilt Arbonne is been sued for being a MLM company that is a pyramid scheme masquerading as a direct seller of health and... Message..

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Text - A.C McGurk @ACMcGurk · 1h Replying to @rickygervais it's strange you love animals but eat them 3 times a day? #govegan 6 Ricky Gervais O @rickygervais · 1h It's strange how I don't eat meat but you think I do. #gofuckyourself 10 17 8 224

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Text - Ib Helpful? < Share 1 review ** a week ago Don't try to get a rush appointment here. They will never fit your pet in, unless you are willing to pay the "emergency fee" of $150, even if your pet is a patient. Very disappointing. Ib Helpful? < Share Response from the owner a week ago We are very sorry that you are disappointed with your recent interaction with our office. We do feel it is important to clarify the situation. You had a no- charge appointment that afternoon to determine how we

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Text - 5 months ago I am an English teacher and I would like to say thank you for teaching my students about English Reply • 1034 It 4! 5 months ago Reply • 27 it 2 months ago I am an English teacher, and I would like to say; thank you for teaching my students about English.* Reply • 31 t 1 month ago no, it doesn't work like that. You can't just put commas wherever you want. There should not be any commas in that sentence, because he performed both of those actions himself. That semicolon is com

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Text - 3 months ago I wish i could give negative rating here.. They have completely messed up the tattoo. Bad choice !! 1 Response from the owner 3 months ago But that isn't the whole story, is it? You requested a tattoo written in a language that the staff cannot read or write. The stencil was shown to you, okayed by you, placed on you, okayed by you again. We accepted our role in the transaction and attempted to come up with solutions. You can read Punjabi.we cannot. In these instances we rely

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Text - Zedd @Zedd Thave a wife???? I didn't know! CanI meet her too?? Met @Zedd's wife in the bathroom at dinner and she is the NICEST person! Have a great night!

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Text - Terrible customer service. Save yourself some time and don't come here. Owner is a jerk and so are the employees. (Owner) for taking the time to leave us a one star today because we wouldn't let you plug Thanks in and charge your segway while you were down the street eating lunch at Chipotke... It really has nothing to do with customer service as I am sure you really know...by the way why wouldn't they let you charge it there?

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Text - This item was shipped in a plastic bag not 1/2 inch larger than the tights themselves. Nothing protecting the hose and when packaging was opened at the top, it snagged the hose. When contact was made, the seller said it was not her fault. Awful packaging not one indication to open with care as even worse customer service. Response from You wrote to us (very aggressively) and said you ripped the item when opening the package with a letter opener. We don't have control on how you choose to

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Text - ** 4 months ago Burritos reminded me of Taco bell in USA. Completely plastered in sauce. Self service, or no service. Ridiculous high price for cafeteria food. Beer was the best. Their own Mikeller can beer. Therefore 1 star. Otherwise no stars to them. O Like < Share Response from the owner 4 months ago We cannot take this review seriously, since we do not serve Burritos.

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Text - This guys stole this other guy art and Didnt even credit him Art Thief posted this it feels like u stole it from me 20h Rispondi Tdon't know if you're trolling or not, but I made this. On your other account you basically took my drawing, cropped out my signature and posted it without credit. Heck, it doesn't even show the entire image. That ain't right, chief.

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Text - - Feb 16 Ancient Spartan boys would run 10 miles barefoot with a mouth full of water They weren't allowed to drink it and had to spit it out at the finish line It was a test Modern day boys are addicted to video games and can't run around the block What happened? O 1.3K 27 507 3.4K Replying to @ Ancient historian here. There's no evidence for this story, a kitsch invention by the modern author Steven Pressfield. 9:29 PM - Feb 17, 2020 - Twitter Web App 108 Retweets 2.7K Likes Feb 17 Reply

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Text - (x 00:47 00:55 r/PewdiepieSubmissions 10m • v.redd.it Posted by u/ It took me way too much time to make this Vote . 4 Share fi TOP COMMENTS 6m • Thanks Jow This is not your video, it's a 2 year old video from Youtube. https://youtu.be/tYwErnpkNjw

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Text - horses (and horsey creatures) for certain can get around just fine on 3 legs, no prosthetics needed (depending on which leg is missing), just so long as you don't ride them (I'm 80% sure you can't ride them if they've only 3 legs). Umm, what? You have a master's in animal science and you think that? It must not be in anything horse-related... Well you gon' learn today! First, a quick lesson on equine anatomy. They walk on the last bone of a single toe. This is different from a human, in w

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Joint - Radius and Ulna Metacarpal II or medial "splint" bone Carpal bones Metacarpal III or "cannon" bone Metacarpal IV or lateral "splint" bone Proximal phalanx or "long pastern" bone Distal phalanx or "coffin" bone Intermediate phalanx or "short pastern" bone

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Text - Additionally, a horse's head accounts for 10% of its body weight; therefore, a 1000-lb horse has a 100-lb weight on the end of a 2-3 foot long pivot point, which in itself weighs several hundred pounds. This is another aspect of their anatomy that varies significantly from a dog or cat, whose heads generally weigh 5% or less of their body weight, and their necks are not nearly as proportionally long or heavy. A horse carries approximately 60% of its weight on its front legs. Imagine havin

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Horse - Lame Horse | My Horse Has A Sore Front Leg Second, let's talk about the mentality and habits of a horse. They are prey animals. A prey animal that is unable to run (and horses with only three legs cannot run - see video of Barbaro below) is innately vulnerable and stressed. Warning - graphic video below. Skip this video if you do not want to see a horse attempting to run with a severely broken leg.

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Horse - Barbaro Injury Preakness Stakes May 20 2006

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Text - Horses' guts are also designed to roam around 20 hours of the day grazing (they only sleep 4 hours per day, generally). This becomes much harder with only 3 legs, especially if the missing leg is a front limb and must support that heavy head and neck leaning forward to graze. They also, generally speaking, do not lay down to sleep, so their remaining limb would not get any rest. If the missing limb is a hind leg, they are also automatically missing half of their "stay apparatus," which is

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Text - A Equine Stay Apparatus (hindlimb) - 3D Veterinary An..: IVAIA Imagine sleeping, but one of your legs has to entirely hang off the side of your bed. It would be uncomfortable, and you might fall out of bed. Congrats, you're missing part of your stay apparatus. Should the horse decide to lay down to sleep, it would be significantly more difficult for the horse to get up if it only had 3 limbs. If you've ever seen a horse stand up from laying down, it's already a barely-coordinated, ugly-lo

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Horse - Wild Horses Rolling and Getting up Watch later Share

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Text - Third, let's talk about an awful condition called "support limb laminitis." Laminitis is a condition where the vascular support structures (blood supply and cushioning) of the hoof get inflamed. We don't really understand what causes it, but we know there are certain things that predispose a horse to getting it. At best it is just very painful; at worst, those support structures break down and the bone inside the hoof rotates and can penetrate through the sole of the hoof. In a normal hor

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Radiology - LM So - how does this relate to amputation? Well, one of the main things that we know can predispose a horse to laminitis, is a period of time where the horse is bearing more weight on one limb. This is called support limb laminitis because the limb that is supporting more weight develops laminitis. It usually happens

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Text - when the horse is lame (painful) on one limb so it spends more time standing on the unaffected limb. Back to Barbaro - he is one of the most famous cases of fatal support limb laminitis. He was being treated at one of the top equine hospitals in the country for his broken leg - and his broken leg actually healed. However, his left hind leg (the unaffected leg) developed support limb laminitis. Even the top equine specialists in the country were unable to control that laminitis despite hav

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Organism - So - if the top equine specalists in the country and owners with all the money in the world are unable to successfully manage a three-legged horse, the average horse owner and vet surely won't be able to.

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Text - Regarding prosthetics, @lizziedoesvetpath has done an excellent synopsis of why they aren't viable in large animals here, but basically it boils down to a combination of all of the above, plus what's in her synopsis, plus the fact that you can't take a prosthetic off of a large animal due to their sleeping habits, and prosthetics are painful and animals can't understand why they have to undergo pain in order to be able to walk around, unlike humans. So basically, the only thing that was c

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Tagged: quit your bullshit , twitter , lying , liars , facebook , social media , ridiculous

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Funny Moments of Kids Being Stupid and Weird

You don't need to interact with a kid for long to know that kids are weird and dumb. It makes you wonder how stupid you were as a kid. Hopefully you've learned a few things since then. As they stand, children don't know anything, have very strong opinions, wield a twisted sense of reality and are easy to trick. Here's more moments of kids being bizarre and stupid.