Funny Tweets to Push Back Boredom With a Broom

Our lives aren't very exciting. We get a few wild escapades here and there, but for the most part a lot of the days are pretty similar. It's not every day that you get to see a guy walk onto the bus wearing ninety hats, then run down the aisle grabbing everyone's hat off their heads before running off the bus, then stop and wait for the next bus. But thanks to the internet, every day we can learn about someone having their weirdest day. Twitter can sometimes be a blender that liquifies misinformation into a nice thick smoothie of bad takes, but sometimes it's a person describing their recent experience of finding a family of raccoons living in their couch. And who doesn't want the details on that episode of "life on earth?" That plus a smattering of the most terrifically weird thoughts someone had that day, and you've got yourself a recipe for not being bored.

Here are more funny tweets to decimate that clawing boredom.

25 Scary Signs That Mean Business

It's extremely important to learn from your own mistakes. But what's even better than that is learning from someone else's. Why go through the trouble of falling into an open mineshaft yourself when you could just as easily read a sign that says "hey idiot, stay away from this open mine shaft." The same goes for airplane propellers, falling snakes, bees, poison gas, bright red explosive barrels, and banana peels thrown from car windows.

Even though it's a shock and a bummer to see signs everywhere that say "drowning risk" and "tick area" these signs are doing us a favor every time we read them. Boy it's nice to have someone else looking out for you, if only just because they don't want to deal with the hassle of locating your remains.

Here are some creepy signs that make their message clear.

Company Demands Employee Take Shorter Route To Save Five Dollars, Tolls Cost Hundreds

For a year, everything was going fine. This employee was taking the smartest route between work offices, only going out of their way by a little bit to avoid any extra expenses to the company. Then along came a new bookkeeper who assumed the best way to save the company a bundle would be to flag perceived "unnecessary expenses" and bill their employees the difference. Her solution was to change the route. Since it was her idea, it's not in her best interest to admit the mistake, so the extra costs are just piling and piling and piling. But it's not like this employee can really do much about it. He was ordered to do this because it was the "smarter" option. One has to love the accountability.

For another tale of diverted routes, here's the time a broken elevator was deemed a non-priority, so one employee broke out the stink-chariot.

30+ Reasons Why Being an Adult Sucks

Let's face it. You spend your youth and teenage years just waiting for the freedom you associate with being an adult… Doing whatever you want, eating ice cream whenever you want, buying as many packs of Pokemon cards as you wish. But when you get there, it doesn't live up to the paradise you dreamt it would be. Food is expensive, work sucks, half your paycheck goes to taxes, and whatever is left then goes to rent. And that's just scraping the surface. There's no wonder that we suddenly see things through our parent's eyes once we cross the divide and start having to fend for ourselves. It's a cruel and unforgiving world out there, and all too often, you're just one wrong decision or mistake away from being homeless. 

Redditors gathered on this classic Askreddit thread to collate a comprehensive list of all of the things that make being an adult not all it's cracked up to be. 

HOA Karen Illegally Fines Homeowner, Gets Taken Down in Court

We've heard plenty of tales of the authoritarian tendencies of nightmare HOA members who will threaten their own neighbors with fines over the color of their recycling bin. It's not a big secret that people who crave authority but lack a sound mind flock to HOA boards and middle management, simply because it gives them a feeling of control that they could never cultivate on their own. These are broken people, and they need to make you feel small because they lack the capacity to better themselves.

Anyway, this person was getting fined for trivial junk by their HOA. Turns out they never had the authority to do that, so they might as well have been pulling notices out of their ass and signing them with diarrhea ink. They lawyered up and watched the show. Of course this isn't legal advice, this is just something a complete stranger wrote on the internet.

For a real nice one, here's the belligerent HOA Karen who complained about guide dog training.

Insanely Incompetent Interviewers Fired When Candidate Exposes Them

This insurance guy was approached by a recruiter for an insurance sales position at a company. Despite his repeated protests that he was overqualified for the role they were hiring for, they refused to take no for an answer and aggressively entered him into the interview process. 

As the interview progressed, it became increasingly clear that the hiring managers had no idea what they were on about. They repeatedly handed him wrong information and asked him to do things that he knew were completely out of line for the profession. This would lead him, the interviewee, to explain to the interviewers how their jobs should work in a professional insurance company. Thankfully, his complete over-qualification for the role allowed him to see through all of this. 

When the cards were laid out, the interviewing team had deemed him unworthy of the position. But it was they who were soon to be discovered to be unworthy of their own.