The Most Absurd News Headlines That Will Make You Laugh Then Cry at Our Ridiculous World

The world is sometimes a scary, lonely, and horrible place. It seems like whenever you open the news these days, something terrible has happened somewhere and it's becoming numbing and ridiculous to even consider that there's good news out there. Fortunately, there are the few news stories that slip through the cracks in the machine, blessing our feeds with some of the most ridiculous heccin' titles imaginable. 

So sure, maybe there's been a horrific bombing in the Middle East… but there's also a talking parrot that was banned from the local zoo because he was cursing everyone out! The world is all about balance and the news is no exception. For us, that balance is critical to maintaining a healthy mental ability to continue opening up our news apps or flipping through the newspaper (if anyone really even does that anymore… do they even still deliver papers?) So stay informed and check out the most absurd, hilarious, and possibly fake news articles that never hit your screen.

'Don't sign it': Worker gets written up for discussing pay with coworkers, internet offers their advice

It's surprising just how often this discourse emerges online; it should be common knowledge among employers that they simply can't tell workers that they aren't allowed to discuss their pay. Not only is it not a good idea and encourages employees to discuss their pay, but it's completely illegal in the United States.

 

'What is this? Cinderella reloaded?': Real-life evil stepsisters make guy's daughter sleep on the floor

Haven't we all heard this story before? And didn't it star Hilary Duff and Jennifer Coolidge?! This thread, which was posted to Reddit's r/AmITheA**hole subreddit by u/Fill-AD53467, is a reminder that some fairy tales have a kernel of truth at the core. In this case, the truth would be that stepsisters can be actually evil to grieving daughters.

 

In this instance, the two evil stepsisters in question made the Redditor's daughter Shiloh, whose grandfather just died, sleep on the floor of their shared hotel room. When the original poster figured out what was going on, he got Shiloh her own hotel room, and the bullies complained to their Mom. Although the Redditor insists that his wife had no malicious intent, we should point out that 'Candace' is very much the name of an evil stepmother (sorry, I don't make the rules!). Even if he made that name up for anonymity purposes, something within him knew that she could be a Candace, and that's because she's also an evil stepmother. Keep scrolling below to see what people had to say in the comments section. For more, here's a story about an evil coworker.

Update! 'I got the harsh and cold side of her': Ungrateful sister unleashes wrath on her sibling over spilled milk

There's nothing quite like seeing someone out of line get completely roasted. In this case, that happened when this younger sister called her older sibling out on being kinder to her children than she was when the sister was younger. When she shared her story via this thread on Reddit's r/AmITheA**hole subreddit, she opened herself up to the savage judgment of the AITA community.

 

Now, let's get some facts straight here: the older sister made one of the biggest sacrifices imaginable for her younger siblings when she was 19 and forced to gain custody of the three of them after they were all abandoned. Obviously, this was horrible and difficult for everyone, and the Redditor is forever indebted to her older sister (and she does seem to be aware of that fact). Yet for some reason, many years later, seeing her older sister react gently when her biological son spilled a glass of milk accidentally set the younger sister off and led to a completely unnecessary rant. 

 

Keep scrolling below to see what Redditors in the comments section had to say and to see an update from the original poster at the end. When you're done, take a look at this post about an enraged Karen and Kevin. 

Terrible Teacher Gives Gaseous Teen Detention, Mother Goes to Principal and Makes Her Pay, Literally

Sometimes people need a little bit of monetary consequence to let them know that their actions have been bad; it's the only stimulus that a lot of entitled, narcissistic, or power-tripping people will respond to. And, while I can't agree with the notion that a teacher should normally have to pay for punishing their student's poor behavior, in this instance, it's clear that this teacher was just abusing their power and really mistreating and harassing this poor student. 

It's incredibly disheartening as a child, teen, or young adult, when a person in a position of authority, who you're supposed to be able to trust and rely on, is clearly misusing their position or just doesn't like you. Most of us have experienced it at one point in our lives, and it's something that sticks with us. 

Keep reading for this glorious tale of revenge wrought by an angry mother and an understanding Principal against a terrible teacher. For more, check out this deranged teacher who took 'no headphones' too far.

 

21 Rootinest Tootinest Yee-Haw Memes this Week for the Funniest Cowboys and Cowgirls Out There (January 13, 2023)

Well, howdy, howdy, howdy. Wrangle up all yer fellow yee-hawing cowboys and cowgirls out there! It's time for some dank rootin' tootin' memes. That's right. Every week we lasso up a rodeo of funny memes that only real internet riding folk will get. You don't need a saddle for this kind of horseplay. Just grab your best cowboy boots, your biggest gallon cowboy hat, and let yourself have a barrel of laughs with these yee-haw memes. You like crackin' open a cold one with the boys after a long day's work on the farm? Why not do that with some memes?! You trying to not lose your cool after finding out the cows got out AGAIN? Doom scroll through some rootin' tootin' memes, partner! We promise, whatever farming, ranching, yee-hawing problem you come across, there's nothing like memes that will help you get through it. You might not be able to fix that fence that keeps breaking on the pasture, but it'll give you time to get your composure before roughing the snow to go fix it. Enjoy below! 

'Bro don't ever send this big a** emoji again': 20+ Super unhinged texts from the weird side of the internet

Texting is a way of life for most people, an activity they do dozens of times per day, so it only makes sense that some insane messages will leak out to the internet. Whatever you write is set in stone, even if you delete the message. So you have to be careful what you're saying — you never know when it will be posted on the internet for the LOLz. Because let's face it, people are super weird, and they just say the strangest, most unexpected things sometimes! 

Some of the funniest texting fails come from wrong numbers. I love the texts below between one spurned boyfriend trying to angry-text his girlfriend. Instead, he hits a wrong number, but luckily the guy on the other end has his back. It's a feel good story, even in all it's absurd glory. 

After you check out these otherworldly text messages, check out this story of one Instagram page that got a fiery dose of commenter anger after making a sacrilegious Snoopy post.