Sunday, November 22, 2020

Tumblr Thread: The Crude King Of Satire, Skweezy Jibbs


Skweezy Jibbs is the legendary alter ego of Tim Savage. Skweezy's basically a firestorm of chaotic good. A national treasure that's wildly unpredictable and renowned for caps locked fits of epic proportions. Just when you think he's rapping off some serious toxic nonsense, he pulls a fast one on you, and ends up being that icon of chaotic good that you never saw coming. This Tumblr thread includes some of Skweezy's more notorious moments. 

1.

Face - nunyabizni Follow Skweezy Jibbs ... Just now • MY SONS ZOOM CLASS WAS RAGGIN ON HIM 4 WEARIN PINK O SO I DYED MY HAIR 2 SHOW HIM BOYS CAN WEAR PINK 2 BUT NOW MY WHOLE BATHROOM IS STAINED PINK O IT STRAIGHT UP LOOKS LIKE I SLAUGHTERED A JIGGLYPUFF IN MY TUB

2.

Text - urbanfantasyinspiration Follow I was worried about this guy. I hadn't heard from him in a while. Glad to see nothing has changed. ruimtetijd Follow Is this the dude that ended up in India instead of Indiana serameli Follow Yep, here's some other Skweezy Jibbs highlights

3.

Text - Where r u??? 14:11 IF ED UP 14:11 how 14:11 I WENT 2 INDIA NOT INDIANA 14:11 Just tell me u dont love me 14:23 14:26 What the f k 14:29 HELP 14:29 /

4.

Text - What's your opinion on goths 21 minutes ago Sent from Messenger Skweezy Jibbs THEY ALWAYS SHOW UP IN THA DARK AN FREAK MY GIRL OUT O JUST LAST NITE I WOKE 2 SCREAMIN CAUSE 1 GOT IN2 MY BEDROOM AN ATTACKED MY GIRL OI HAD 2 F 5 minutes ago IN KILL IT I'm a goth I would do anything like that to your girl e But I love you bro ur a good guy 3 minutes ago- Sent from Messenger Skweezy Jibbs MY BAD I THOUGHT U SAID MOTHS Just now Sent from Mobile

5.

Text - Skweezy Jibbs @Skweezy Apr 24 times is tough so when i heard @wendys was givin out free 4 piece nuggs today i knew i had 2 HUSTLE A, i hit every damn wendys twice within 17 miles across 2 states it took 5 hours but now we eatin free 4 a week WHAT IT DO00000

6.

Text - Skweezy Jibbs Just now • MY SON JUST ASKED ME 2 BUY HIM A BIKINI O WAS LIKE IF U WANT 2 GROW UP 2 BA REAL MAN AN NOT SOME THAT THA BEGINNIN OF SUMMER IS THA WORST |NO RU OUT OF UR MIND WEIRDO U NEED 2 LEARN TIME 2 BUY SWIMWEAR NO SON OF MINE IS GONNA PAY FULL PRICE 4 A 2 PIECE U GOT 2 WAIT TIL FALL IF U AINT TRYNA GET RIPPED OFF KID

7.

Text - Nov 15, 2016 at 14:57 O MY SON JUST CAME HOME FROM SCHOOL AN WAS LIKE DAD IS IT OK 2 KISS ANOTHER BOY I WAS LIKE BECAUSE U HATE GAY PEOPLE O AN I WAS LIKE NO ITS BECAUSE UR 8 AN THA ONLY THINGU SHOULD BE USIN UR MOUTH 4 IS THESE BURGER KING PANCAKES I JUST BOUGHT 4 DINNER SOON AS U TURN 16 U CAN PLAY LIP WITH WHOEVER U WANT BUT RITE NOW U NEED 2 NO AN HE WAS LIKE IS IT AS GET AT THESE PANCAKES

8.

Text - lemongrass-and-cedarwood Follow This man must be protected at all costs upset-hufflepuff Follow chaotic good A Xxxdreamingflowerxxx Follow This dude is one hell of a mood.

9.

Text - jalter-is-my-wife Follow If it weren't for the India one I would assume this was satire, but nope. I'm so glad it's real. 4 fallentitan98 Follow Absolutely the maddest lad real-jaune-isms Follow The light of this dark age

10.

Text - lovelybutnot-ablankcanvas Follow OHHHH THIS GUY THIS GUY IS A LEGEND lumanae Follow SKWEEZY, ARE YOU A FUCKBOY? HELL YEA

11.

Snout - FEELIN UNBELIEVABLE CAUSE KITTENS ВЕ OUT GETTIN PETS FROM YOUR BOY SKWEEZY JIBBS

12.

Text - ultimatebottom69 Follow ultimatebottom69 Follow The only fuckboy I will protect with my life with no regards for it josephjoestarsass Follow this man is a treasure that-is-not-milk Follow ah hes here again 134,999 notes

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