Wednesday, June 24, 2020

Tumblr User Explains Their Annual "Moving of the Jesus"


It's a passive aggressive holiday ritual. Some families have elf on the shelf and others have "please take that horrible excuse for a Jesus away." For some more religious-themed tumblr shenanigans, here's a Tumblr thread on holy water loopholes and for more unique family dynamics here are people's weirdest family tics.

1.

Text - grumpsaesthetics every year around christmas me and my grandma play this fun family game called “maybe you want to put jesus in your room instead, sweetie? :)". now, it's important to note that the jesus referred to in our game is not actually the real jesus christ, but instead a wooden figure i made in 2011 that has an uncanny resemblance to the lord and savior himself so what happens is that i place jesus in our living room, and my grandma smiles and asks me if i don't want to decorate

2.

Text - now, the real jesus christ might have been able to perform a miracle like this, but please remember that the jesus in our story is only a figure made out of wood. he can not move on his own, so i think we can safely say that my grandma is the prime suspect here the first year i would often confront my grandma about this, but she would always make up an excuse and never straight up tell me she moved him because he's so ugly it's an embarrassment to the family eventually i grew tired of her

3.

Joint - grumpsaesthetics and so it begins..

4.

Text - voxiferous i was not fucking ready for this photograph iopele this photo makes the whole thing so much better ... and I cannot stop laughing help I need oxygen

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