Wednesday, April 8, 2020

Worst Pickup Lines Ever Heard/Used


In a recent AskReddit thread, folks are sharing the worst pickup lines that they've ever heard or used. As it turns out, using intentionally terrible pickup lines that maintain the necessary level of social decency, can work wonders when it comes to breaking the ice. Sometimes those outlandish pickup lines one could never imagine themselves saying, actually work. Life is strange. Of course, those very pickup lines can backfire in glorious fashion as well. 

1.

Text - ktsb • 22h You are good woman, i am good man.

2.

Text - redghostplanet • 22h "You know that dress you're wearing would look even better laying on the floor next to my bed" said to me on the early 80's

3.

Text - AndrewZabar • 20h "Do you live around here often?"

4.

Text - ouchmypeeburns • 21h "l'd break every chair in the world just to have you sit on my face."

5.

Text - HamTheSam1234 • 22h 1 Award are you a bank loan? cause you got my interest

6.

Text - Franka035 • 22h F3 7 Awards My friend said he had great pick up line. It was "are you my toe? Cause I wanna bang you against a furniture at my place". My other friend, already wasted, insisted that he would try it on a hot girl at a bar. We followed him as he approached and said: "Hey are you my toe?... Cause... you look... like my toe..." That was probably the worst I've heard.

7.

Text - DeepRoot • 21h I was at a concert and I overheard a girl ask a guy, "Hey, can I borrow your lighter?" "Sure, here you go. Can I borrow your number?" "Sure, here you go." That shit actually worked?!?!?

8.

Text - GrammatonYHWH • 23h One of my mates in uni actually pulled on Tinder by telling a girl: Are you a dragon? Cuz l'd slay you. Then again, he was super attractive. He could've told her she had better tits than her sister, and he still would've seen some action. Guy was drowning in Tinder matches.

9.

Text - lesquishi • 20h 1 Award I was bar hopping with some mates. Already quite drunk, we walk into a bar, grab our drinks and before we sit down. One of my friends turn to me and says "Hey, watch this". I knew he was up to something, I turn around to see him walking straight to a girl at the bar. It went down like this. Friend: "Hey... did you fall from heaven?" Her: blushes "Wh-" Friend: "Because it certainly looks like it" He cracks up and staggers away. I was absolutely stunned. I had to go

10.

Text - -floatybean • 21h Did you see the mistake in Spotify? They didn't have you as the hot single. To this day, I still cringe at that.

11.

Text - CarlJibbs • 21h No shit, about 12 years ago, a buddy and I sat down at a dive bar. He looked at the chick next to him and just said "Wanna bang?". She looked him up and down briefly and went "Yea...alright, let me finish this beer first." It was impressive and disgusting.

12.

Text - JaeArk • 21h I once waited until the 10th of October just to ask a girl "are you today's date? Because you're 10/10"

13.

Text - PaticusMaximus • 22h Are your parents bakers? Cause those are some hot buns!

14.

Text - nooneymonkey • 20h Me..." are you looking at my bum?" Him...panicked. no!" Me. " well you should! It's great!' We married

15.

Text - clappedgamer69 • 23h You can call me Shrek because l'm head ogre heels in love with you.

16.

Text - Spikey_Bits • 21h Are you a fire alarm? Because you're really fucking loud and annoying.

17.

Text - matthewh5432 • 19h Held out my fist and asked a girl "will you hold this?" When she put her hand out I grabbed her hand, held it, and said "while I go for a walk?" We are now married.

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