Saturday, November 21, 2020

Twitter Thread: Even Vampires Hate The Bottom Of The Ocean


Not even vampires are down with the prospect of kicking it at the bottom of the sea. I mean, it's understandable. It seems like too often we're hearing about some new, unfathomable monster being discovered in those dark and murky depths. It's pretty much the underworld. So, it's reasonable that immortal beings would eventually end up taking a permanent hiatus from exploring that area. 

For some more gold from Tumblr check out this Tumblr post about a barista encountering a real life mad hatter.

1.

Text - Skeleton J. Ball @C_L_Ball Vampires are immortal, right? So what's stopping them from laying on the couch for all eternity watching TV? Like, really lazy shitty vamps. Skeleton J. Ball @C_L_Ball Man, a really lazy vampire could just order lots of delivery food and cash in on delivery dude blood.

2.

Text - Skeleton J. Ball @C_L_Ball Until all the delivery dudes in town are trained right off the bat to not deliver to mausoleums. Skeleton J. Ball @C_L_Ball Funeral directer can no longer order delivery, doesn't understand why. Small portion of graveyard dedicated to different delivery resturants

3.

Text - Skeleton J. Ball @C_L_Ball I guess if you're immortal, you could just do pointlessly risky shit. Just juggle knives until you fuck up. "Ow my finger. Haha nbd" Skeleton J. Ball @C_L_Ball wait, if vampires don't need air, they would be AWESOME scuba divers. They could just wear a backpack full of rocks and walk on the bottom

4.

Text - Skeleton J. Ball @C_L_Ball And if they dive deep enough, light won't even reach down there. Like, aquatic vampire covens at the bottom of ocean trenches Skeleton J. Ball @C_L_Ball "Don't underwater cave dive, too dangerous." "Why, would I get lost & drown?" "No, fucking SCUBA VAMPIRES."

5.

Text - spookyscaryfrog I have headcanons about what vampires should be. samisbamboozled Pay them in blood to tell us what is at the bottom of the ocean. thebibliosphere Vampire emerging from the deep in s blind panic: fuck the ocean, there's too much weird shit down there! Human: but what about your bloo- Vampire: FORGET THE BLOOD HELEN, THERE'S THINGS DOWN THERE WITH MORE TEETH THAN ME, RUN rmh8402 Hahahaha Source:cat-eel #vampires

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