Sunday, May 17, 2020

A Plate of Puns to Fall Face First Into


Puns are a lot like a party guest with a guitar: usually not welcome, but excellent when deployed appropriately. We can't really tell if we love or hate puns, but there's certainly a time and place for them. If you're in need of more wordplay, here's a smattering of puns to fill the pun void.

1.

Face - Hey man, do you want to hear a really good Batman impression Sure STOP! NOT THE KRYPTONITE! That's Superman... Thanks man, I've been practising it a lot. Pun hub

2.

Job - Your welcome mat. Thank you. PELLO MATT WELCOME You're welcome, Matt. odueto PELLO MATT WELCOM

3.

Job - People who sell meat are gross. PunHuboine But people who sell fruit and vegetables are grocer. Pun hub

4.

Blackboard - There are for guarontees blue 6fe but a i's azure thing!

5.

Electronics - ding bat @_w0xy 1d Don't forget to tip your server O 227 274,844 16.2K Show this thread

6.

Headphones - WHAT MY FRIENDS THINK WHENI TELL THEM IM INTO CURRENT ELECTRONIC HOUSE MUSIC w/im fectshane

7.

Yellow - Unsharpened pencils are pointless

8.

Medical assistant - I'm going to deliver the baby Actually, we'd like him to keep his liver BadtasteBB

9.

Product - Let that sink in...

10.

Natural foods - Apple Dis a apple Pear

11.

Shopkeeper - You wanna box for those, Sir? Soy Jerky ky Nah, I hate violence. Is it cool if I just pay with my card?

12.

Text - Taming Fred Savage @FredTaming [ first day as a superhero ] villain: why is my calendar wrapped in aluminum? me: i foiled your plans [i am immediately killed ] 1:33 · 24 Jan 20 Twitter for iPhone

13.

Text - Why do dogs float in water? Because they're good buoys.

14.

Text - Teacher: what is so funny? Me: nothing... My brain: Joseph instalin' vreamstime dreamstime dreamstime dream time

15.

Text - guiltmenot: A guy walks into a bar and sees 3 pieces of meat hanging from the ceiling. The guy asks, "What's this about?" The bartender replies, "Well, if you can jump up and slap the meat, you get free drinks for the rest of the night. If you miss, you pay for everyone's drinks for the next hour. You wanna do it?" The guy replies, "Nah, the steaks are too high." hah ha

16.

Road - HAN SAYS SOLO DOWN LEIA OFF THE GAS HWY Y Hwy Y

17.

Product - Is this the right number for the phone repair? Sure is. What can I do for you? as you see there is a massive crack Grow the fuck up

18.

Nose - Birds: *exists* Mockingbirds:

19.

Walking - Always practice good high jean

20.

Cuisine - 857 606 Comments 1,7K Shares Like לן Comment Share There's not mushroom for anything else

21.

Text - Laura Today 2:20 AM Hello Laura! You look pretty fly! Today 3:06 AM Hey! Sorry if that opening pun was a little plane Np I was just winging it. So where are you from Haha I see none of those jokes really took off

22.

Product - How do you think we keep the cars here so shiny? Polish? @PunHubOnline Sorry sir, Jak myślisz, jak trzymamysamochody tutaj tak błyszczące? Pun hub

23.

Presentation - Me: Is it a crime to throw sodium chloride in your enemy's eyes? Judge: yes that's assault Me: I know it's a salt but is it a crime?

24.

Blackboard - People say I'm plagiarist. Their words, not mine. 4/27/20120

25.

Cartoon - Daddy, why is that book so thick? It's a long story

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