Thursday, September 24, 2020

Prized Tumblr Gems From Tumblr's Best


We've always had a soft spot in our hearts for the wonderful minds of the Tumblr world. In this day and age we can all benefit from effective ways to keep our troubled minds distracted for a while. In the case of Tumblr, the rabbit holes and strange, hilarious observations are seemingly endless. It's the gift that keeps on giving. Check out some more gold from Tumblr with this thread that hits on recipe stereotypes from around the world.

1.

Text - Went out for a chinese meal with my family last night. At the end of the night I was looking through the bill and found this. It's worth mentioning at this point that I told the staff I have a severe seafood allergy. k1/2 19.50 ck Thai hi ck C'nut Chi ck SS 7.90 Crispy Chil1 8.50 i Beef 2 Rice Special 9.40 7.50 7.90 NO 01 NO FUCKING S O HRIMP OR HE D IE 21 Choo Pan 10.00 E arocketumbler NO. NO FUCKING SHRIMP OR HE DIE. idealfry This is what l'd call a responsible restaurant service. Well

2.

Text - gasmaskaesthetic The weirdest instance of "getting my wires crossed" l've ever experienced: I had a piece of candy at my desk. My intention was to simultaneously eat the candy and start a brief work task. I put the candy in my mouth and felt a surge of alarm as I was convinced, for a fraction of a second, that I had somehow eaten the task I was about to start.

3.

Text - RE tilthat TIL in the story of the Jewish Exodus from Egypt, the Torah uses the singular word tzefardeah for frog, not the plural tzefard'im. Some interpret this as meaning Egypt was plagued by a singular frog. via reddit.com lielith It's a beutiful day on Egypt and you're a terrible frog

4.

Text - katy-l-wood Today at work a girl at my register was heatedly explaining to her mother that wearing a dinosaur costume to her school's decades day was, in fact, perfectly acceptable because her teachers did not specify any particular decades. smallest-feeblest-boggart the kids are alright Source: katy-l-wood

5.

Text - rrozeselavy-deactivated-deactiv rich ppl are like so easily convinced abt ghosts I remember growing up it was near this vacant lot and whenever I broke a toy instead of going to face the wrath of my mother I would fucking bury it in that lot and then sure enough, some dude tried to develop the land and found a ton of buried rotten dolls and shit and told everyone it was haunted it's been over a decade and that lot is still vacant johnnyfourballs You single handedly tanked the value of som

6.

Text - sandersstudies There is something very special about driving around at 3-4 AM. Like, am I up ridiculously late? Am I up ridiculously early? The world may never know. sandersstudies *sees other car* and what the FUCK are you doing up synebluetoo Me driving around at 3:30 AM: tee hee what goblin mischief could I be up to? the world will never know Me seeing another car: DEMON! DEMON!

7.

Product - pawsthomasanderson All 3 generations of Godzilla suit wearers walking down the street together returnofpowerbastard that street must be huge

8.

Text - richiessneakers so today in my geography class the kid that sits next to me wasn't there. so about five minutes into class and the door swings open and the kid comes in and our teacher goes "you're late" but the kid doesn't answer and just trudges miserably up to the teachers desk and slides a note across to him. so my teacher opens up the note and reads it aloud and it says: “my best friend dared me to talk in only crazy frog quotes for the whole day and I was too stubborn to say no." an

9.

Text - muslimmafia my grandfather always had candy in his pockets, and one time when I got really sick and I was hospitalized my dad told him not to give me any candy. He pulled out his pockets to show he hadn't even brought any and I got really sad but as soon as my dad walked out of the room he then proceeded to take off his hat and had 2 chewy chocolate candy toffees and 2 orange fanta toffees, and l'll never forget the happiness and surprise I felt in that one moment in my entire life. Sourc

10.

Text - RE tilthat Follow TIL squirrels’ brains grow in size during the fall to help them remember where they bury their nuts. Their brains are smaller the rest of the year via reddit.com pon-raul Follow post-nut clarity

11.

Text - garfimbo thinking of the time I ordered olive garden online and I put "please speak to me in an Italian accent" in the special requests category and completely forgot about it, and when I went to pick it up the guy comes out and goes "eyyy I got-a your-a order bappada boopity!" and when I told him he didn't actually have to do it he was like "a-nooo | was-a looking forward to it! I was-a the only one-a brave enough to do it!" Source: garfimbo 8,147 notes

12.

Text - lawbreaker13 •.. S anxietyproblem Dear September, please play nice. awordshesays please, please gurl-why-u-like-this September? Isn't it currently March 174th? lawbreaker13 I was so confused by this post because I genuinely thought "isn't September in three months?" It's in 6 days

13.

Text - pteapotdactyl ... * weareallfromearth Follow getlitaesthetic Follow Today 10:12 I want 6 pet sloths so I can name them after every sin except for sloth Today my wife texted me this, and then immediately called me to make sure I got it because it was "an urgent message". Source: getlitaesthetic 56,433 notes

14.

Text - targent what is it about being on a plane that makes people go buckwild for ginger ale literally everyone be ordering it franklyfranchia ginger ale is supposed 2 help settle ur stomach if ur nauseous so ppl get it on planes if they get planesick A transhumanisticpanspermia ginger grow in the ground so it keeps you connected to god's earth while you're thousands of feet up in the Heathen Tube

15.

Text - Paris @sweatingalready I'm late to work cuz I followed this dog for 3 blocks in the wrong direction Sounds like a reasonable excuse to me catwithbenefits modern day siren

16.

Text - skeleslime-phantom Popular Opinion Mint Ice Cream and other mint flavored foods taste GREAT and y'all can't change my mind sushinfood op do you accept constructive criticism skeleslime-phantom choose your next words carefully, dear sushi sushinfood mint suck skeleslime-phantom YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE DISRESPECT MY MINTS

17.

Text - onion-souls S mister-clean-official Seguir tilthat Seguir TIL bacteria scream when they die via reddit.com mister-clean-official Seguir I know. -Mr. Clean Fuente: tilthat 1.907 notas

18.

Text - RE tilthat TIL Despite its association with the supernatural, a full moon rarely occurs on Halloween. The next time this will happen is Halloween night of 2020. via reddit.com A silverjirachi Follow :/ 187,656 notes

19.

Text - KREI i tilthat TIL on the set of The Princess Bride, André the Giant once "let out a 16 second fart and brought production to a standstill." Nobody said anything except director Rob Reiner, who said "Are you OK, André?" to which André replied, "I am now boss." via reddit.com lizardsister legends only asexualbrittaperry im crying the lack of a comma meant that for a full minute I interpreted this as him declaring himself the new boss

20.

Text - rabioneab: i think my neighbourhood deserves a sitcom because there's • me, the teen blogger • a house with 8 nuns • a drug dealer who drives a hummer a scottish man who only ever wears a kilt and mows his lawn at 3 am • an elderly couple who drive everywhere on their lawn mower • a peacock who has been roaming the neighbourhood for years and no one knows why or where it came from I'd watch the shit outta that show

Submitted by:

Posted by at
Labels:

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)