Tuesday, March 15, 2022

Old Recipe Cards We Hope No One Ever Tried


The thing with recipe cards like these from Jell-O or weight watchers is that they seem less like helpful suggestions and more like dares. It's as if a roomful of people thought "obviously there are only so many graceful and tasty uses for aspic, but maybe if we just get weird with it, we can convince bored housewives full of valium to try this making garbage if only because they're so underwhelmed by their own lives that they might want to see what their husband has to say when they serve a vertical salad." And someone else was like "I mean I hate it, but honestly it's not the most absurd idea we've had. I mean this company started when we just decided to boil a bunch of horses."

Because honestly, these don't even look like food. A lot of these look like those abstract bot-created images designed to look familiar but also completely confusing at the same time. Like, to the point that your eyes have trouble focusing.

At the end of the day, we can only hope that these cursed foodsweren't made by people who thought these were good ideas, but simply by people from some kind of special interest group like "the herring council" trying to make up a bunch of potential recipes to use herring.

No comments:

Post a Comment