Funny, Absurd and Miserable Signs That Came From Earth

Sometimes we're blown away by what some people think needs to be committed to writing. You'll just be walking into work one day, and on the fridge, someone has taken the liberty to post in 128 point font "We know it was you, Lisa." Your first assumption will likely be something like "well, I'm not Lisa, so I don't have to worry about that part." But the rest of it becomes a mystery that's simply too delicious to put down. What kind of shenanigans did Lisa get up to? And is the original poster correct in their assertion that is was in fact Lisa who did "it."

These kinds of things happen every single day, and luckily, as people living on this planet, we get to walk right into the middle of someone's sign war and ask ourselves who's being more unreasonable. No one's really being hurt, as long as they're not as threatening as creepy signs that make their message clear.

Here are some more funny signs from all over this world.

Customer Gets Screwed Over By Dealership, Gets Justice When Management Finds Out

Car trouble is a hassle even when everyone involved actually wants to resolve the issue. But when a dealership does everything it can to make the process as difficult as possible, things can quickly spiral into nightmare territory. That's where this person found themselves after being told that they didn't have the guts or the funds to sue the dealership over their assery.

That's the weird thing about disputes in the neighborhood of a few hundred bucks. It's a game of chicken between who wants to get the law involved. It's a non-trivial amount of money that would be painful to lose, but it's also not enough to ruin your life over. Luckily the internet is full of information about how to take things to small claims court.

They had a pretty good case put together, but it was the Deus Ex Machina of power suit lady who set things straight.

For a cartoonish tale of transactional glory, here's the employee who pulled a reversal on a customer's coin revenge by counting it all out.

Woman Can't Handle Fiancé's Giant Python and Unleashes It Upon the World, Gets Sent Packing

Trouble has emerged between this Reddit user and his fiancée following a disagreement the couple had over his penchant for creepy crawlies. 

User u/Warm-Art-378 posted this story to the r/AmItheAsshole subreddit asking for advice from users regarding the disagreement. He was wondering if he was in the wrong for his reaction to the incident. Essentially, what had happened was his fiancée had taken issue with a ball python that u/Warm-Art-378 had acquired shortly before she was due to move in with him. He had to slowly acclimate her to the snake but noted that by the time she had warmed up to it she had thought it was "really cool."

Apparently, this wasn't actually so, because when u/Warm-Art-378 arrived back from an out-of-town work trip he arrived home to find the snake missing. Inquiry revealed that his fiancée had betrayed his trust and let it loose outside. 

The betrayal of trust is a major issue here, but even larger still is the effect on the ecosystem that the release of pets into a foreign environment can have. This is, after all, how the Burmese Python ended up establishing itself in Florida. There have been other notable introductions of invasive species to ecosystems in this exact manner.

It is also incredibly cruel to the animal itself and that alone is cause to send her packing. Do you really want to have someone in your life who is capable of hurting a living creature?

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In Defeat at the Deceit, Daughter Watches Dead-Beat Friend Eat Mom's Elite Sweet Birthday Treat

The damning evidence in this deceit is quite concrete. It is incontrovertible. There is no neat for the jury to retire. In all my years of judging, I have never heard before of someone more deserving of the full penalty of law. 

With food available in such an abundance these days, it's hard to rationalize how this could happen. I could order McDonald's on Uber Eats right now, and it would be here in 5 minutes if I couldn't be assed to consider or prepare any other options. And with Uber Eats available in 6,000 cities and 45 countries, I find it pretty hard to believe this wasn't an option in most major populaces in the western world. This isn't an ad for Uber Eats, so please, god, don't flame me for that in the comments. I'm just in dire need of something to eat. Good thing I have all these baked goods my friend made for her mother's birthday here and ready to go.

Asides aside, this thread was posted to the r/AmItheA**hole subreddit this week by Redditor u/BigPower6749, where it has received 10k upvotes. Commenters are horrified at the friend's audacity and utter incompetence; how could they have thought eating all of those treats was ok?

Oh, and be sure to like, subscribe and check out Uber Eats^TM.

TV Repairman Pulls a Sneaky On Indecisive Customer, "Fixes" Their TV

Problem-solving is a process. But the first, often most difficult part of problem-solving is actually identifying the problem itself. Sometimes the issue is just in a person's imagination, and you're beholden to their questionable opinion in order to "solve" that "problem."

Such is the case with this story of a TV repairman who had a client with a dubious issue. According to her, things just didn't look right. Other than that, there were no real problems to speak of. So what do you do when a problem has been completely invented? Well, this guy went and invented his own solution. This guy was able to make a customer happy with the magical powers of "just making something up." It's a simple solution, but it takes guts to pull off correctly.

For another trial and tribulation of the proud repairman, here's an entitled goofball who called the cops on an emergency pipe repairman and found himself arrested.

Entitled Mom Demands Martial Artist Remove Knee Brace, Says It's A Competitive Edge

Isn't it lovely when someone has the audacity to complain about rules and fairness when they don't know any of the rules in the first place? It seems like this mom is under the impression that martial arts tournaments are about fights to the death, and making it so your opponent can never walk again. Which is what led to her freak-out when noticing OP putting on a very medically necessary knee brace. 

Despite the fact that it's fine to have a knee brace, officials knew about it, and kicks to the knee are illegal anyway, this mom wasn't having it. Apparently she was under the assumption that it was protection against a competitor stomping the everloving meniscus out of her knee, which is again, illegal, and not that it's being used so this competitor can actually stand. Thanks lady, for making everything more complicated for no reason.

For an intriguing tale of leg-based drama, here's the guy who tried bullying a woman out of a disabled parking spot, so she showed him the stump.

Obvious Signs That Someone Is Romantically Interested

Searching for romantic interest is thrilling, nerve racking, and often confusing. We all want to know if we're being received well, and that our intentions are being reciprocated, because who the hell wants to be involved with someone who doesn't like you back? The annoying thing is that "just asking someone if they like you" can be a socially risky thing to do, and most of us feel like that puts us in a vulnerable position. So naturally, you try to look for signs that someone's lingering eye contact is an indicator of interest, and not just that they're gawking at your dog-ugly, punched ass of a face.

So here's a bunch of people's best guesses at judging another person's interest. Will they be accurate 100% of the time? Absolutely not. There is no sure-fire way to gauge anyone else's interest perfectly. And even if someone gives you a lot of attention one day doesn't mean that they're gonna be just as interested the next. Maybe they had a nice dream about you are they like your shirt.

But at least when you know, you know. So there's some consolation in that. Here are some times people missed blindingly obvious times someone was interested in them.

Twitter Thread: Woman Discovers Polite Little Line Of Caterpillars

Nature is a strange thing. Once you think you've seen everything, you come across a big long line of caterpillars that are queued up like they're waiting for the next iPhone. There's something about organized bugs that make them seem a little more human. Or maybe this is distinctly inhuman, you know, since this whole endeavor is a little too well organized and none of them are cutting in line.

Processionary caterpillars are the larval stage of a kind of moth. They also have little hairs that can be harmful especially when swallowed, so  when it comes to pets they can cause more harm than good. And depending on where you live, this might seem like a bit of an everyday thing. So, you know, you might very well hate these things. But hey man, they line up real nice.

For some more nature stuff, here's the group of friends who discovered the Shark tracker and found various shark journeys.

Teenage Girl Gets Fired by Heartless Sonic Manger After She Called Out to Grieve Four of Her Friends She Lost the Night Before

He coldly said, "I run a business." Really, Sonic? Do better. 

10 TV Shows That Aren’t Nearly As Smart As Fans Think They Are

Sweet Seductive Nostalgia To Help Us Run Away From The Present

When we look at our own childhoods with a critical eye, they weren't really that great. We weren't all that happy, we spent a lot of time being at school or doing homework, and we couldn't drive around or buy beer. A lot of what makes childhood exceptional is the retrospective part; looking back and thinking about when we didn't watch the news or pay taxes. The whole world and all its injustice and agony was still happening around us, but since we were kids, none of it concerned us. We just played N64, rode bikes, and drank Mountain Dew. Also our knees and backs didn't hurt.

Such is the draw of nostalgia. Seeing an old blockbuster VHS or bottle of Fruitopia gives us a little reminder of those tax-free, back-painless days. You don't really know what you have until it's gone.

At least now we can stay out as late as we want. So there's that.

Here are some more powerful images of sensory nostalgia.

Hosts Roasted In Viral Tweet When They Demand Payment For Meals at Their Dinner Party

It's tough to see how this can be anything other than the most excellent tactic for ensuring that you never have to host a dinner party ever again. Or have to see your friends again, for that matter. And while that might sound like an introvert's dream, I'd probably still suggest another option. 

You see, people are not going to want to see you or spend time with you… They're going to hate you and talk to each other about how petty and cheap you are. You might even get blasted on social media for the world to witness.

That's what happened to the hosts of this dinner party after they asked Amber Nelson to pay for her meal when they invited her over for dinner. She posted the incident to Twitter asking the following question:

Got invited to someone's place for dinner, and they charged me for it….this is weird, right?

Responses to the tweet were overwhelmingly bewildered and outraged. With some commenters offering some different cultural practices relating to the incident.  

 

Terrifically Obvious Realizations People Had Way Too Late In Life

Reality is a tenuous thing. If you quietly have an extremely dumb misconception about something, it's unlikely that someone is going to point it out to you until that thing is brought up in conversation. Right now, all of us probably have some real stupid junk floating around in the back of our heads. Stuff like "onions probably go on trees" or "I hope too many people don't visit Hawaii at the same time, I'd hate to see the Island sink."

And people will let you continue to have these thoughts, too. Out of politeness or sheer fascination at your stupid wrongness, you can continue pronouncing quinoa the wrong way or insist that ketchup is a kind of animal milk for a scary long time before anyone tries to call you on it. Sure, that's how you get 40 year olds walking around who think it's a good idea to put metal in the microwave, but at least no one had to have a difficult conversation. Only a difficult time trying to find a new, non-burned-down place to live.

Here are some moreobvious things people learned way too late in life.

Entitled Boyfriend And Daughter Ruin Vacation, Get Left 800 Miles From Home

Dave thought he'd use his girlfriend's vacation with her kids as a bonding experience for him and his own teenage daughter. Under most circumstances, this would probably be seen as a positive addition. But it seems like Dave and his kid aren't exactly the type of people who are fun to be in a car with all day. After dealing with days of protesting, complaining, and having general crap attitudes by Dave and his daughter, OP felt like if they didn't want to be on this trip, they didn't have to be. So she made the executive decision to let them take a rental car back, in spectacular fashion.

We've all had moments where we've been frustrated enough with someone to say "aight, get out of my goddamn car" but very few of us have the moxie to actually do it, especially so far from home. But it seems like this was the right choice. Telling Dave and his offspring to shove off was the thing that saved the trip.

For some absolutely wild family drama, here's the entitled mom who stole her children's birthdays for years.

Insane Family Forces Bride to Give Wedding Venue to Pregnant Sister “Because She Needs it More”, Father-In-Law tells them to “F- Off”

This bride was approached by her family, who demanded that she give up her wedding plans to her sister, who "Needs it more" after she fell unexpectedly pregnant. When she declined to answer the demand, her parents began to usurp her bookings and contact her reservations behind her back. 

This story was shared by Redditor, u/paperweightfairy, to the r/entitledparents subreddit, where it has become one of the highest voted posts of all time for the sub. As you might expect from the name, r/entitledparents is a sub where people can share stories they have experienced with entitled people who think that they are a gift to the earth just because they crapped out a child. These stories often center on people's parents and the entitled and selfish things that their parents have put them through.

Such was the case for u/paperweightfairy, who will hereafter be referred to as the OP (Original Poster.) 

OP had planned her wedding for years, she explains, as she had been finishing her Ph.D. She and her fiancé had been sure to book in her "dream venue" for after her graduation, which is when the two planned to finally be married after a three-year engagement. 

This delayed engagement indicates a significant trend among younger generations getting married at lower rates than ever before. 

A two-year-old study conducted in 2020 indicated that only 3 in 10 millennials have a family of their own. Down from 4 in 10 amongst Gen-Xers and 59% of Boomers when they were at comparable ages._[1]

All indications are that modern work and education requirements and decreased affordability thanks to higher costs of living have contributed to these declines. 

OPs family, frantic and the news of her sister's pregnancy, ambushed her at a family barbecue and insisted that she give her approaching wedding reservations to her younger sister. 

When OP declined to give her reservations to her sister, her sister rushed off in tears. Her mother then retorted, "You waited three years. Would it have killed you to wait a few more months?" 

This would be the beginning of a major ordeal for OP and her fiancé. Her family would begin using underhanded and shady tactics to try to tear their reservation away from them. It just begs the question; Wouldn't it have been a better use of time and energy to just put that energy towards planning an additional wedding? 

Luckily for OP, and seldom the case in these stories, her future in-laws were a voice of reason. Her father-in-law stepped in to help his son and daughter-in-law out and told her parents to "F*** right off." Read on for the full story below.

Screaming Karen Threatens Handicap Man Trying to Park in Official Spot, Viral TikTok Shows Cops Shutting Her Down

The cops that SHE called had her walking away in defeat after she refused to let this handicap man with an official placard park in his spot because, "he doesn't look handicapped."

Star Trek Memes That Are Set To Stunning

There's just something about watching a crew of tight-shirted dorks in an endless morality play that really gives us a squeeze of the good brain juice. Maybe it's because it makes us feel smart despite having a dubious basis in actual science. Maybe it's that feeling of endless possibility that a universe offers. Maybe it's all of the aliens that look like humans with some extra forehead, all locked in struggles of political turmoil that so mirror our own world. 

Honestly, we think it's Captain Kirk's campy "two fisted smash" that he uses to impossibly incapacitate his enemies. Or the fact that after so long, you'd think the engineers of the future would find a way to stop sparks from shooting everywhere every time they get hit with something. It's kind of beautiful that Star Trek has the capacity to be both terrific and also kind of dumb at the same time. But isn't that the case with everything that we love?

Here are some more Star Trek memes to show to the next generation.

Entitled 'Choosing Beggar' Roasted Online, Wants Free Tattoo Since Tattoo Artist’s Job is “Just a Hobby”, Artist Claps Back

This tattoo artist was frustratingly faced with the request for a free tattoo by this entitled choosing beggar who had deemed his trade to be "Just a hobby." 

The exchange was posted by u/rockpaperpowerfist, the tattoo artist in question, and the purple messages in the attached text message exchange. They posted the messages to Reddit's r/mildlyinfuring subreddit. A subsection of the site where people predictably post infuriating things, but only mildly. 

I'd say that this surpasses "mildly" straight on into "extremely." It gets tiring seeing all of these artists being asked to work for free or for "exposure" by entitled a-holes who need but are unwilling to pay for their services. If it were so easy to do it and do it well, you'd do it yourself. Wouldn't you? This person first praised u/rockpaperpowerfist's work before asking for a free design. 

The artist replied that they "Don't work for free." To which the entitled beggar answered that "If you enjoy it, then it's not really work," and that "tattooing is just a hobby." 

The original poster and commenters had a lot of fun with these statements commenting that you could apply this logic to anything. u/rockpaperpowerfist suggested that everyone tell their landlords that "You owning my house is just a hobby." And decline to pay their rent. People wouldn't get away with being this entitled in other expense areas. So why is everyone so determined to cheat artists of payment for their work?

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Manager Pushes Their Mistake Onto Dishwasher, Staff Quits, Restaurant Has To Close

As a manager who takes credit for other people's successes, you also have to take credit for your own mistakes. Too many managers don't seem to understand that it's a two way street, and think that it's their employee's job to make up for their bad management.

This is one of those times when a manager did a bad job and expected that their mistake could just be passed on to the lowest guy on the company ladder. Thing is, when the employee on the lowest rung is also absolutely essential to the whole place running, it doesn't behoove you as a boss to make their life a mess.

This dishwasher was explicit with their availability, and when the hammer came down in the form of 40 bussing carts of dirty dishes, all this manager could do was watch the cascade of problems that they'd just expertly arranged for themselves.

For some more work drama, here's the two part story of a new owner who didn't know how to run their company.

People Share Times Their Revenge Was Too Effective

They say that the best revenge is a life well-lived. That's true, but it's also pretty great to see someone get sweet, sweet karma for their garbage behavior. But the problem with having a plan to get back at someone is that sometimes the consequences can outweigh the slight in the first place. That and, being people with consciences, it can actually make us feel bad to screw someone over. Even if it feels like someone totally deserves to be put in their place, watching another person break down and cry might not actually feel as good as you may have thought it would.

Here are some times when people decided to get back at someone, and found that not only was their revenge effective, but it might have been so effective that they had second thoughts about engaging in their spiteful behavior in the first place. 

But also, don't steal your roommate's food if you're lactose intolerant. That one's on you, buddy.

For a tale of revenge that went awry, here's the time an employee reversed a customer's coin revenge by counting it all out.

Tolkien Thursday: 50 Lord of the Rings Memes That Are More Brilliant Than the Silmarils (March 17, 2022)

We're trying a fresh, brand-new idea this week that has been wholly incepted from scratch. It is, in no way, a complete rip-off of a weekly piece that Memebase already runs. 

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Fëanor created the Silmarils during the Noontide of Valinor. They contained all that was left of the light of the Two Trees which were destroyed by Melkor. Rumor had it that Fëanor was first inspired to bend the light of the trees into the Silmarils when he laid eyes on the golden hair of Galadriel. When he was famously and repeatedly rebuffed by Galadriel and denied strands of her hair he instead turned his attention to a creation of his own.

The Simarils were coveted by the Valar, who wished to use them to restore the Two Trees; But were stolen by Melkor, who, if you couldn't tell already, was a generally bad dude. Melkor then fled from Valinor to Middle-Earth. 

Renowned for their brilliance, the trees and the Silmarils were never forgotten by those who laid eyes on them.

Let these memes be the same as your eyes reflect their radiated brilliance. 

 

Woman Screams at Disabled Teen to Move From Reserved Seating, Flees in Disgrace When He Reveals His Disability

There's something to be said here about not judging a book by its cover. There's also equally as much to be said here about not being an insane and entitled a-hole to other people while in public spaces… or ever for that matter. 

High End Nail Artist Goes Viral for Her Story About Taking a Mystery Client and It Turning Out to Be Vladimir Putin

Hands down, one of the most bonkers stories ever to be shared on TikTok. 

Boss Has Tantrum And Demands Room Cleared, Gets His Wish

As an employee, it's your job to be the arms of your boss. And when that boss is a crazy person who can't handle their emotions and ends up flailing his arms around in impotent rage, you are the one doing the flailing. So much for being an appendage.

It just so happens this boss thought he could get exactly what he wanted by screaming a lot, and upon being asked for clarification, he provided it. His employees were more than willing to erase this other owner's existence from the office, so he got what he wanted. But, much like a genie in a joke, this guy got a lot more than he bargained for. So maybe it's kind of a bad idea to make huge demands while you're absolutely freaking out. In one fell swoop this guy was shown exactly how much faith his employees have in his ability to lead. But hey, he's the big smart owner so he'll think of something.

For another tale of questionable leadership, here's a woman who was infuriatingly fired for telling a customer the truth.

Coworker Let Go After He Uses Anti-LGBT Slur at Work, Girl Submitted Complaint Pretending to Be Customer to Get Him Fired

In no way am I going to condone the poster's actions here. But, It's pretty hard to feel bad for the guy who got fired. It's just karma taking its course a little more aggressively than usual.

This topic was posted by u/imnotchineseokay to Reddit's r/pettyrevenge subreddit. Which, predictably, hosts a range of stories of people exacting revenge of the petty variety on deserving individuals. As you might expect, the subreddit is chockfull of stories marinated in the justice-bonery stew of 'revenge fantasies' and 'altruistic punishment.' 

Math And Learning Memes For The Brainiacs Among Us

We should feel lucky that we live in a time when knowledge is so freely exchanged. Just a few hundred years ago, if you wanted to know how calculus worked, you had to invent it yourself. But now, if you really want to know how the nuts and bolts of the universe fit together, you can just go online, watch some videos and do a bunch of exercises. That said, if you want to be acknowledged for knowing complex math, it's still likely that you need to pay a bunch of money to attend and accredited institution and have a particular person explain complex math to you before you watch those same videos and do those same exercises.

And also, if you don't have an affinity for math, you will never own a home. Sorry. That's just how it looks like it's shaking out.

Here are some math and science memes full of arithmetical humor.

20 Memes From the Depraved Depths of Scottish Social Media (March 16, 2022)

This bizarre collection of tidbits into the Scottish way of life ae sure to make ye chuckle and blow a little air ou ye nostril. 

The interest in Scottish social media has long been trending on the internet, predominantly centering around 'Scottish Twitter.' Know Your Meme describes the trend as "A humorous tone in reaction to events on Twitter which come from a Scottish perspective. As a result of this, tweets by Scottish people have been recognized within national and international media coverage." 

Know Your Meme also clarifies that items that qualify for the trend are usually, "Tweets which use Scottish patter are usually not understood by the rest of the world due to the complex of the language that Scots use."

One thing is sure, deciphering these social media posts is half of the fun. The other half usually lies in the absurd insight into Scottish culture that you find once you're literate in the Scot's dialect. 

After you're done browsing, head here for more of Scottish Twitter. 

 

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People Share The Craziest Things Their Exes Have Done

Breaking up can be difficult. It's hard to know if you made the right choice to end things. But sometimes your ex steals your dog, or calls your work and tells your boss that you've been stealing, then offers doctored texts to try and frame you. That makes it a whole lot easier to be confident in ending the relationship. Sure, it's an absolute nightmare in the short-term, to have an ex lie to your landlord in a plot to try and make you homeless, but in the long term it's nice to have total confirmation that the relationship was definitely not going to work out.

So here are some people who got some extremely good indicators that they weren't a good match, for the most part. Some exes are nice. But the interesting ones usually aren't. There are people out there who will use a break-up as an excuse to really stretch out their crazy-legs and offer the world some insight into their real character. And man, some people are a Rube Goldberg machine of messed up.

For some more moments when people threw caution to the wind, here are people's "screw it, I'll deal with it later" moments.

Woman Moves from Switzerland to L.A. for a Modeling Deal, Quits and Becomes a Horse Farrier in the Middle of the Desert Instead

She went from living in makeup socializing with L.A. socialites, to living in the mud hanging out with horses—and she absolutely LOVES it. 

Mother-In-Law Installs Camera In Woman's House, Family Sides With Mom

In a mind-boggling breach of privacy, this woman's mother-in-law secretly installed a camera in her adult son's room to make sure he was being taken care of well enough after an accident. To make matters more confusing and horrible, it seems like everyone in this family is so used to this kind of behavior that not only are they tolerating it, but they're trying to tell this woman that she's over-reacting.

Unless this lady is Misery-ing her husband in his bed, it's pretty unlikely that she's doing such a poor job of taking care of the dude that it would warrant a 24-hour live feed to a 33 year old man's room. The internet responded by basically telling her to get a divorce immediately. So, not a whole lot of terrifically constructive feedback, but not necessarily unwarranted. The whole thing just feels too creepy. At least she found out before it was too late and the mom busted out the popcorn for a Saturday night viewing. Yikes.

For some more absurd parental overreach, here's the mom who stole her children's birthdays for years.