Nothing like punching someone in the face and stealing their Cheetos.
This video is pure wish fulfillment for anyone who is just sick as shit of hearing the name Harambe. Imagine it: You burst into the office of a lawyer who wasted $100,000 on a artificially flavored snack chip, punch them in the face, and lick Cheetos dust from your finger tips. It's a dream come true.
Submitted by: (via Jimmy Kimmel Live)
Far down the road and deep into the future when we've been conquered by aliens, please oh please, let them find this unsettling nod to the social media-crazed society we created for ourselves.
Submitted by: (via Hot Dad)
Yes, this is every bit as cringe as you'd expect it to be; and quite frankly, big ups to Anderson in this case for doing away with the small talk (as is expected on a talk show) and cutting right to the juicy stuff.
Submitted by: (via Team Coco)
Sometimes you hear of a man so annoying, so unpleasant that a whole country decides to troll the shit out of him.
That man: The reality-TV gameshow host Donald Trump, the President of the United States for some reason.
That country: Scotland.
On Full Frontal with Samantha Bee, correspondent Amy Hoggart traveled to Scotland to see how the country made trolling Trump a national pastime.
Submitted by: (via Full Frontal with Samantha Bee)
Hey, everybody, LET’S DANC—
Hold up there, Kevin Bacon, because this is Henryetta, Ok, and we don’t take kindly to dancing within 300 feet of a church.
Apparently, a local vintage shop in Henryetta was planning a Valentine’s dance, but thanks to a town ordinance, there’ll be no dance this year. Joni Insabella, the owner for Rosie Lavon’s Market place, a vintage shop and event space that was hosting the even, and her husband, the town attorney, has been “accused of being lawbreakers and encouraging lawbreaking.”
Henryetta Dance Canceled Due To 38-Year-Old City Ordinance https://t.co/uQHMoxPiNm http://pic.twitter.com/0IcGsPMoS4
— Social In Okla City (@SocialNOklaCity) February 9, 2017
Nothing says small town America like “the town attorney" and "no dancing ordinance."
The couple plans to fight this thin and has gone on record calling the person who called in the complaint a “party pooper.”
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What's better than a Snow Day? A super cool superintendent who calls it.
Joseph Roy, the Superintendent of the Schools in Bethlehem, Pa, and the 2017 Pennsylvania Superintendent of the Year, made a lot of kids very happy this morning, when he announced school was canceled.
To thank him, his students, and the rest of the world, are showing him the proper respect on Twitter. He really is Pennsylvania Superintendent of the Year.
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Now I just want to give my mom a big 'ol hug. There's soo much true in these it's actually ridiculous.
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Allegedly natural, am I right fellas? Either way, Samantha Lily of Russia identified a market with endlessly thirsty customers, and she's capitalizing on it like a shameless self-objectifying champ. I think.
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The Great Canadian Blueberry Heist needs to be a movie in my lifetime. That's all there is to it. I will accept nothing less. This is one of those double take-worthy kinds of stories: you see it jump across your social media feed, doubt everything about it, and proceed to have your world rocked as you develop a strange craving for Blueberry Pie. Yo, for real though. It's got everything I could want in a slice of crime: the big getaway, the ridiculousness of $100K of blueberries being stolen, and the fact that it's a tale of thievery with Canadian roots.
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Policing, it's a dirty job, but someone's got to do it.
But with all the stupid people out there, have you ever wondered why they aren't getting called for dumb shit all the time? Well, it turns out, they are!
The police officers of Reddit are sharing the stupidest calls they've ever responded to, and, man, they are as advertised.
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My joints ache just reading these painful displays of public humiliation. This is why being a couch potato pays off. Give me the sweet, soft pillowy confines of a couch perfectly molded to my lazy ass, with a jumbo bag of chips and bottomless bowl of queso any day of the week.
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When you think of America's bad boy, only one name comes to mind: CNN Anchor Jake Tapper.
With his cool demeanor and slicked back hair, it's no wonder that people don't cower in fear when ever he appears on their TVs.
Taking the nation's best interests in mind, "GOP operatives," allegedly, are looking into Tapper to destroy him after his infamous grilling of Kellyanne Conway, according to a report from Axios.
So the nation's foremost authority on "being as bad as I wanna be" is beating them to the bunch. Jake Tapper is opening the dirt file and throwing it all over Twitter. Check it out:
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The internet has always done a fantastic job of destroying the things we hold dear. The very existence of rule 34 has left me with little in my life that has not been utterly ruined.
Well, along comes this Ask Reddit thread to destroy dear old Dr. Seuss. Although, some of these don't quite fit into the classic Dr. Seuss pattern there are some truly amazing (terrible?) erotic poets lurking around.
I promise you, after reading these you'll never again be able to read Dr. Seuss without dirty rhymes floating through your head.
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At The Knicks game last night, former player Charles Oakley was arrested after, allegedly, going after Knicks-owner James Dolan and putting his giant finger through a dude's head. After a brief fight, it took about five or so of MSG's finest to bring this Oak tree down.
But Twitter is here to support him. This footage is nuts and people loving it.
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Say what you will about Col. Sanders, but he knows how to get the most out of his fried chicken.
I'd say he was a war criminal for this one, though.
KFC's "Chizza," as they're calling it, is a pizza made with sauce, "chicken ham," pineapple, mozzarella cheese, and KFC "cheese sauce" on a fried chicken crust. Every component of this thing except the sauce seems like complete insanity. Also, did I mention that it's served on a fried chicken crust.
Right now, it's only available internationally — probably because this kind of thing might be illegal in America, but if you're in Singapore, you can check it out. Don't be a chicken. Try it.
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This is some serious John Woo shit.
This dude was ripping shit on the sand dunes of Qatar. You know, crankin' some hot wheelies and sick jumps over hundreds of feet of sand. And in the middle of one of his launches, the dirt biker's back tire hit a moving Jeep Wrangler because oh, hell yeah, that rocks.
He was ok, but the Wrangler had a bit of road rash. If you're smart, though, you wouldn't fix the hood becuase it looks so dope.
Submitted by: (via Desert Dirtbikes)
if you haven't heard, at massive tornados and storms have been tearing across Louisiana, and this footage of one of them puts it in perspective. Luckily no deaths have been reported yet, but there were at least 25 injuries. But Jesus, this is terrifying.
Submitted by: (via ViralHog)
You probably say things "Welcome to Earf" and "Cowbunga, dude" all the live-long day. But it turns out, you're wrong, dumbass. And as usual, the wiseguys over at Cracked are here to correct you because you suffer from the Mandela Effect. you know like when you thought Sinbad was in that genie movie "Shazzam," which never existed.
Submitted by: (via Cracked)
