Sunday, July 5, 2020

Spooky Signs that Mean Serious Business


There are a lot of unconventional hazards in this world. You wouldn't think that walking into a mine field or falling into a hidden pit could be a legitimate danger, but luckily we have creepy signs that mean business. Sometimes they're overly vague, and some put the danger into cartoonish detail, but that all amounts to the fact that these signs should definitely not be ignored.

1.

Signage - HackneyHomes In partnership with HHackney Council Please Keep off the Grass This is one of many burial grounds pertaining to the Black Plague 1665-1666

2.

Electronics - HELP When Elevator Stops Functioning Press and Hold Help Button for 3 Seconds.

3.

Signage - Warning! Evacuate the island if you hear 8 short blasts. NorthWestern Energy

4.

Sign - CRIME ALERT Do Not Stop

5.

Sign - 1-5 t/ 5+†X

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Natural landscape - If you hear a siren for more than 30 seconds, please evacuate the park immediately 。如听到警报响30秒, 请立即撤离地热公园

7.

Text - EXTREME DANGER SUBMERGED WEIR THE DROWNING MACHINE • Venturing over the weir is RISKING CERTAIN DEATH. • Escape is IMPOSSIBLE once caught in whirling water. • Portage as directed. EMERGENCY - DIAL 911 Albera

8.

Nature reserve - JOINT SECURITY AREA PAN MUN JOM IN FRONT OF THEM ALL THE WORLD'S MOST DANGEROUS GOLF COURSE AS FEATURED IN SPORTS ILLUSTRATED 192YARD PAR 3 * DANGER! D0 NOT RETRIEVE BALLS FROM THE ROUGH LIVE MINE FIELDS COURSE PRO: MAJ MATTHEW M.STANTON

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Red

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Signage - PLEASE, DO NOT FEED OR MOLEST ALLIGATORS Gators CAN NOT be tamed and feeding them can result in their mistaking a hand for a handout Florida Law prohibits the leeding or molesting of alligators!! Support Wildlife Alert! you see someone feeding or molesting an dlligator, plep coextension 072

11.

Text - ВЫХОДА НЕТ THERE IS NO ESCAPE

12.

Urban area - rante NS DEBIT CA DANGE Bol

13.

Yellow - CAUTION 120 MPH TRAIN PASSES ON THIS TRACK PLEASE STAND ВАCK

14.

Lawn - PLAY HOUSE WARNING! AGGRESSIVE MOTHER DEER! AVOID WALKING BEHIND PLAYHOUSE ESPECIALLY WITH DOGS NO KIDDING, SHE'S SERIOUSLY SCARY

15.

Nature reserve - 危険! 絶対に車から出ない 窓やドアを開けない DANGER! Never get out of your car! Never open the windows!

16.

Text - WARNING ENTERING HISTORIC URANIUM MINING AREA RE AWARE OF OPEN SHAFTS TUNNEL AND MINE WORKINGS CONTAIN RADIOACTIVE RADON GAS - STAY ON EXISTING ROAD- - DO NOT APPROACH OR ENTER OLD MINE WORKINGS-

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Nature reserve - 注意 熊出没 大和町

18.

Yellow - PULLOUT CANOES е HERE BCA Parks DANGER WATERFALL AHEAD. АНEAD BCA Parks

19.

Yellow - ASBESTOS DUST HAZARD WEAR ASSIGNED PROTECTIVE EQUIPMENT AVOID BREATHINGI NEREMAIN AN ARA DNLESS OUR WOORK P EPUST MAY DE HAZARIN

20.

Text - |PLAGUE CAUTION Chipmunks, ground squirrels, or other wild rodents in this area may be infected with plague. You can get plague by: Being bitten by an infected flea Touching or holding an infected rodent Being bitten, scratched, or coughed upon by a cat infected with plague OBSERVE THESE PRECAUTIONS: 1. AVOID ANIMAL FLEAS. Do not camp, rest, or sleep near animal burrows. 2. DO NOT FEED OR TOUCH chipmunks, squirrels, or other wild animals. 3. DO NOT HANDLE sick or dead animals. Report them

21.

Wall - Mosquito level High (unbearable)

22.

Soil - DANGER HIGH DEATH POTENTIAL KEEP OUT

23.

Text - CAUTION CHIMPS DO PICK UP BAD HABITS EASILY! BEWARE THEY CAN THROW OBJECTS SUCH AS FOOD OR FECES, ESPECIALLY WHEN EXCITED. NOTE - EXTREME SWELLING OF THE RUMP IS NATURAL WITH THE FEMALE CHIMP, AND WILL OCCUR WHEN SHE IS IN HEAT CYCLE.

24.

Sign - A Danger A Quicksand O Stay away

25.

Text - CHLORINE CHLORINE GAS DANGER! POISON! CA is

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Tagged: crazy , scary , warning , sign , wtf , danger , signs , lol , dangerous

Tweets That Perfectly Sum Up Marriage


These tweets will either convince you that you actually want to get married, or talk you out of the process altogether. 

1.

Text - David Hughes Follow @david8hughes Me: the book is so much better Wife [pauses Shrek 3]: can you stop interrupting every 2 minutes

2.

Text - Myrrh Follow Gixix82 The secret to a lasting marriage is knowing no one else would put up with your bullshit.

3.

Text - Jessica Valenti Follow @JessicaValenti I love my husband, but no matter where we are I make him sleep closest to the door so if anything happens he gets murdered first.

4.

Text - Kate Sidley Follow @sidleykate Call me old-fashioned, but I believe marriage should be between a person who hates pickles and another person who will eat that pickle.

5.

Text - Wendy Follow @_wendyb07 Husband: you walk really loud. Anyway, marriage is fun.

6.

Text - mama770 Follow @deegeemindi I'm secretly doing an investigation on how many decorative pillows I can put around the house till husband loses his shit. Current count:23

7.

Text - James Breakwell O Follow eXplodingUnicorn Wife: *trying to open a can of tuna* Our can opener is broken. Me: So it's a can't opener? Wife: I can't believe I married you.

8.

Text - Lurkin' Mom Follow @LurkAtHomeMom Toddler: *crying bc it isn't her turn with the princess crown* Me: Sweetie, you need to share Husband: Just give her the crown, you're 35

9.

Text - Walking Outside Follow @WalkingOutside Marry your true love so you can always wake up together and say, "Breathe the other way".

10.

Text - Simon Holland Follow @simoncholland [Me, on my deathbed] Wife: Is that what you're going to wear?

11.

Text - Chad Read Follow @squirrel74wkgn *tosses bath towel on hotel floor* [text from wife at home] "Pick that up."

12.

Text - Punchyk Follow @AnkCoupleTO Wife: How many times have I told you NOT to use my face moisturizer as body lotion? Me: *skin absolutely glowing* is this a trick question?

13.

Text - not the WORST mom Follow @nottheworstmom *RSVP'ing to Christmas party* Whispering into phone: is it ok if I bring my weird roommate? Husband, from behind me: STOP CALLING ME THAT

14.

Text - Donna McCoy Follow @Donna_McCoy Until I got married I didn't even know it was possible to chew bubblegum arrogantly.

15.

Text - The Cre Master Follow @Jmboyd58 *wife runs back into our house which is on fire* What are you doing!? W: I just want to straighten up a little before the firemen get here

16.

Text - Jersey Follow @better_off_dad Only marriage can turn a missing spatula into an act of war.

17.

Text - Michael would like Nazis kicked off of this site. Follow @Home_Halfway WIFE: We really need to think about sticking to our monthly budget ME: *feeding my pet octopus a bag of emeralds* I agree

18.

Text - Abe Yospe Follow @Cheeseboy22 My wife hates snakes. But if they sold snakes at Target, we'd probably have a few snakes.

19.

Text - Dumb Beezie Follow @dumbbeezie Marriage is alright if you like someone coming home and telling you about their day in the middle of your movie

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Woman Tries To Eat Homegrown Tomatoes, Gets In Showdown With Wasp


This woman was just trying to enjoy the results of her hard earned efforts with growing some tomatoes. You'll see at the end that those tomatoes are a thing of beauty. That being said, she ends up in a tense, adrenaline-charged duel with a persistent monster wasp. Things could've gone very differently. 

1.

Text - r/tifu + Join u/leahnardo • 1d 1 2 4 F1 3 2 1 TIFU by not watering my tomatoes and underestimating physics M This happened about thirty minutes ago. So l've been Covid gardening since March, growing stuff from seeds, and my tomatoes are monsters. Six feet high and still going. Temps have been in the upper 90's, so I need to water them twice a day. I check their condition, note they do need water, then see an actual TOMATO OMG. Since this is the first edible thing I've seen after three mon

2.

Text - The wasp is, as you can imagine, not terribly pleased to be trapped in the thickets of my hair. I do not panic, however. I grab the base of that hank of hair and hold it while still leaning forward so the angry little bastard doesn't swing directly into my face. I go into problem- solving mode. The wasp does not wish to be in my hair- I do not wish the wasp to be in my hair. Yet, I sense, cooperation will not be possible. I instead enlist physics as my helper and attempt to fling the litt

3.

Text - Having switched directly from "not panicking I can solve this" to "panicking now HAVE A WASP IN MY BOOBS," I yank the neck of my tank top forward in an attempt to keep the buzzing motherfucker from digging a hole in my fun bags. Luckily, the wasp appeared to watch a lot of fashion television and was instead attacking my tank top. I mean, I get it. No one wants to be flung into leaf green ribbed polyester. It is so last summer. Having learned absolutely nothing from my previous flirtation

4.

Text - Still bent forward and holding my tank top's neck at least a foot from me, I crow in victory and straighten up, immediately making awkward eye contact with the three stunned construction workers in my neighbor's back yard. No, I was not wearing a bra. So yeah, I just flashed those poor men with leaning forward middle- aged dangle boobs. Fluttering like pennants in the wind. Not the most flattering angle. Did I attempt to explain my entirely reasonable circumstances to those baffled people

5.

Text - tl;dr: Monster tomatoes lead to cleavage wasp, and my titty semaphore is not understood by baffled bystanders. Edit: Wow, I crashed and went to bed after reading a few very nice comments that made my night, and woke up to a very full inbox. Thank you! Also, yes I snuck out after dark to water the tomatoes, they are going to be fine! I watered them again this morning. There are no construction people over at my neighbor's yet, but they appear to be building a fence, so l'm going back insid

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Flower

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Plant

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