Sunday, August 23, 2020

Mistaken Wife Believes Actor Friend is An Actual Doctor


It's an actual case of "I'm not a doctor, I just play one on TV." Some folks are so far in that they can't really be helped. It's a regrettable part of life that there are people walking around like this. For example, take these wildly dumb things people have heard or these facepalm moments.

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Text - r/IDontWorkHereLady · Posted by u/loslaslon 16 hours ago "He's not a doctor." “Yes he is, I saw him on TV." XXL Not quite sure this fits, but wasn't sure where else it would. So I've had a friend since college who's a great guy, I love him to pieces, but I've occasionally considered ending the friendship because his wife is so jarringly dumb. For the life of me I do not know what he gets from her. Ok, I do, she's one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen in real life. But even still,

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Text - A while back I had a friend visiting, "Camden," and she was dropping her kids by to hang out with mine. I invited her to stay for a bite to eat because yes she's exquisitely dumb, but she's perfectly friendly. Camden's been trying to break into acting and he recently had a bit part on a TV medical drama. So I brought it up, saying, "Camden just recently had a small role as a doctor on this show." She went "Ahhh, that's so exciting! Congratulations! That must not be easy, to get a job ther

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Text - And she laughed and went, "Well, we all feel that way when we first start, regardless of what job. Just keep working hard, and you'll get all that stuff over time. But don't sell yourself short! It's not easy to be a doctor." And he took the compliment and went into how he went about playing the role, the body language he tried to adopt for the intensive care unit, that sort of stuff. Then she cut him off and went, “Actually, you know what, if you wouldn't mind, my son has actually had th

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Text - Camden, confused and weirded out by the whole thing, started saying, "Oh, no, uh... heh... they didn't teach us any medical stuff for the part. I can't, like, help you with this." I jumped in and changed the subject, but she left shortly after. I'd long since given up on trying to explain to her why some jokes are funny and others are not, so I thought I'd let it be, even though she seemed kind of miffed when she left. Later she came back to pick her kids up, and by then Camden had gone h

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Text - So, as I processed the pure bitterness in her voice, I realized she genuinely and truly thought Camden was a medical doctor. So, convinced I must be misunderstanding her, I further reiterated, "No, no, he's an actor. He played a doctor. On that show. You've seen the show." (It's not a small production, it's like Grey's Anatomy or House, everyone knows of it.) And, even angrier now, she said "Of course I have, I know all about it. It's one of the best hospitals in the country, why do you t

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Text - As soon as she was gone I called my friend, her husband, to try and catch him before she was home. I relayed the whole series of events to him, and his response? "Oh that. Yeah, it's a problem. But it's not entirely her fault. Often times those shows use stories ripped from the headlines of the actual news, you know? So you can see why she gets mixed up sometimes." She bumped into Camden at my anniversary party not too long later and asked him, with genuine concern, if a character on the

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Text - So, if you wonder how our country ended up where we are, know that she has a bachelor's degree from an accredited college and holds a job with several subordinates and partial responsibility over our city's water supply. So.. advocate for education reform whenever you can, and enjoy these twilight years of the great American experiment.

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Text - JFerrer619 1.8k points · 17 hours ago This...this can't be real. I refuse to believe this is real! Please tell me you're just trolling us all. loslaslon 2.0k points · 16 hours ago • I wish. Other top highlights of hers include remarking on how it's a sign that God loves America best because fireworks always happen on the Fourth of July (she thought they were a natural phenomenon like the northern lights or volcanoes), stubbornly insisting on eating an actual rose (not icing, real) off a c

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Text - SuspiciousLookinMole 310 points · 15 hours ago My ex-MIL was a bit like this. Back in the early 00's. she borrowed my hubby's Discman for a roadtrip. (yes, I'm old) When they got back, she returned the Discman to hubby saying "I think it's broken. No matter what CD I put in, it just played this loud - NOISE. Like that metal music you always listen to." He had left a Slipknot CD in there, and she just.put her CD in without checking, or without checking when the Garth Brooks she expected di

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Tagged: wtf , absurd , wife , ridiculous , story , dumb , funny , stupid

Old Folks Dispense Their Dating Advice


Aileen's giving off those gold digger vibes, for sure! All in all, this is quite the fun collection of dating advice from some old folks that have navigating their own romantic rollercoasters. Maybe there's bits of truth in their jokes. Who knows? 

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Text - Jating Advce Name - Aleen Age-90 Moke has a loaded wallet. Sure he

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Text - Dating Advice Name-Barl Pick Someone, with good out look on ife. a

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Text - Dating Aduce Name - Grahame Age - 86 Find a grl with a good eart

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Text - Dating Advice Nome - David Age. 92 Ask her parents firsć, explain that you would ike to vecome a Couple with their daughter and promise to Yook af ier her.

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Text - Dating Adice Nome -Bergl Age-86 Alwoye reepeciful. Treal them how you woul like to be treated. be

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Text - Dating Advce Nome - Joan Age- 75 Expect your date to be polite to you if" not WALK AWA Y

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Text - Jating Advce Nome -cbyce Age- 88 Yes please / would ike to go on a date.

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Text - Dating Aduce Nome- Tom Age-87 Treat your grl life royaliy like princess. a

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Text - Jating Advce Nome -Marg Age -84 Don't let the bays take adantoge

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Text - Paung Aduce Name-Joan Age-21 Behave yourself

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Text - Dating Advce Name June Age-87 Donit

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Manager Bullies Employee Till They Quit, Employee Reports Manager


We love a good tale of a nasty manager getting theirs in the end. This particular manager sounds like a grade A bully. The manager exercised zero empathy for an employee going through a heartbreaking loss. On top of displaying zero human empathy, the manager proceeded to make the devastated employee's life miserable by blatantly targeting them for a whole bunch of nothing. Fortunately, the employee was able to get HR involved, and ultimately put together enough evidence that ultimately contributed toward the manager's ultimate downfall. 

Check out another glorious tale of revenge with these naive young business owners that foolishly fired the man with the patents.

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Text - r/ProRevenge u/Nubmuffin • 1h + Join 1 Manager bullies me for several months until I finally quit. I made sure to get him fired. Obligatory "english is not my native language, apologies for my mistakes and grammar!" This happened around 2016. I'd (at the time 25/26M) been without a job for a while, looking for a better paying job than I had before and I found one at a camera security company that was looking to hire someone for the servicedesk.

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Text - I went for an interview and got a call back later that day. If I wanted the job it was mine. Now, my new manager was an ex military. Specifically ex-army (not american, just pointing that out). He REALLY didn't like having people disagree with or going against him. A thing I was very unaware of when I took the job. For 2/3 months everything was going well. The manager was cordial and seemed to really enjoy having me there. I worked my butt off every day, as the software we were working wi

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Text - However, after that period my grandpa, who was like a second father to me, suddenly was hospitalized after a brain bleed. (aneurysm?) He was found in the shower, he had collapsed after he pressed his panic button. (assisted living? Not sure how it's called in English, apologies). This all happened on a wednesday. The family came together in the hospital several times to show support and see grandpa. However, on Friday afternoon, 3pm I was called up by my father (my grandpa's son) while I

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Text - I went to my manager and explained what just happened and that I'm going home to be with my family. However, that day there was an event. The company was doing a charity event and this charity was going to be public news. They already announced the amount of people participating and it would look bad if they were a person down. It was basically just for good PR. So he refused to let me go. I told him that by law he me as my contract states I can take a day for a death in the family and th

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Text - This all continued for several months and severly began to impact my mental health. I had a talk with my parents and my fiancé (at the time still my girlfriend, l'd ask her to marry me in December 2016) and they basically told me that this was not okay, that I didn't have to take this and that I should give them my 2 weeks notice. I agreed. The following day I went to HR and explained why I was leaving the company and that I couldn't stand the idea of working even a single day more with t

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Text - HR showed interest in my well being and even more importantly in what I was claiming about my manager. They had received more complaints about him, but nobody had proof of his wrongdoings. So, they asked me if I had proof. I told them l'd be looking for a new job, but l'd gladly fit in the time to collect all I could. For the next 2 weeks I collected everything. Memo's, emails, voice recordings (when on the phone the calls are automatically recorded and the dumbass was stupid enough to cu

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Text - I had one last talk with HR and him at the same time the last day I was there. Before he even walked in, I told the HR person who was mediating: "He's going to walk in, say what he wants to say and l'll be quiet and listen. When he's done, l'll explain my side and he's going to interupt me, tell you l'm lying and talk about completely none related subject matter to drag the conversation another direction.". She looked surprised at my comment, but had no time to respond as mister army man,

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Text - Eventually I got up, told HR "I told you so. Here's the documents you've been asking for.". I placed a filled folder with several dozens of emails, plenty of memo's and a USB containing 3 phone conversations and even video footage of him yelling at me, in both voice and video recordings you could easily hear him cuss me out. I gave the manager a big bright smile, who was smirking victiorously and said to him: "I don't think you'll be smirking like that for long. Enjoy your little victory.

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Text - I called one of my old colleagues to ask what exactly went down. My proof opened pandora's box. He was being disrespectful to the female staff, insulted the older staff and on multiple occassions was less than cordial with our external hires. None of these complaints were acted upon, because it was his word against theirs and there was no proof. However, me providing overwhelming proof of his gross behavior towards me made all other complaints now to be taken as fact.

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Text - He was promptly fired less than a month after left and they refused to provide him with any form of reference. In a field like his references mean a lot. So not getting one from a company you worked at for nearly a year is a huge red-flag. It's now 2020, 4 years passed and according to linkedin he's still not working in his field. l'l gladly admit that I felt rather wickedly satisified and still do whenever I happen to think about it. TL:DR Manager began to bully me because I went to my f

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Quora User Breaks Down Size Of The Universe


Perhaps the most mind blowing fact about the size of the universe is that the universe doesn't have one size, instead it's just that the universe is literal size. It's also wild to think about the fact that we can see the light from a galaxy that existed long before homo sapiens did. Taking a minute to step outside the mental carousel of juggling our daily obligations and life problems, and to stare up at space to appreciate the beautiful insignificance of it all in the grand expanse of the universe, can work wonders for keeping the ego in check. 

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Text - 8:47 4 l LTE What fact about the universe's size blows your mind? Krister Sundelin · Updated July 30 E-learning Producer (2020-present) Q: What fact about the universe's size blows your mind? A: On a dark night with no moon and a clear sky, go out of town and up a mountain. Bring binoculars. They will help. Then find the giant W in the sky. That's Cassiopeia. Below the W is a stick figure of sorts, a giant Spongebob Squarepants. The square is the square of Pegasus, and the legs are Androm

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Text - Aim your binoculars at it. You may see something like this: That smudge is the Andromeda Galaxy. It's a galaxy 2.5 million light-years away, and it is in fact our closest galactic neighbour (if you don't count the satellite galaxies like the Magellanic clouds. That means that the light that you are seeing right now left that galaxy 2.5 million years ago.

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Human - At that time, Homo sapiens did not exist. In fact, Homo habilis, the ancestor of Homo ergaster and our ancestor Homo erectus, had just appeared. And that's our closest neighbour.

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Sky - Let us widen the scope a bit. You can't do it using your binoculars, however. This is the M87 galaxy.

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Text - It's a bit famous these days, because scientists have managed to capture an image of a black hole at its center. They used a radio telescope as big as the Earth to do it: The "virtual telescope" used radio telescopes as far apart as Hawaii and Tenerife, and Greenland and the South Pole. Those signals have been travelling towards us for 55 million years. The light and radio signals we are seeing now left M87 a mere 10 million years after the dinosaurs died out, and around 47-50 million yea

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Text - And that's just 55 million light-years away. The light from this little blob has travelled 240 times further than that. This is MACS0647, the farthest known galaxy from Earth. Thanks to the expansion of the universe, it is now a lot further, but its light has been travelling for 13.26 billion years. It may be one of the first galaxies in the universe, three times older than Earth. 55.5K views · View Upvoters · View Sharers · Answer requested by Bixin Shui 4 1.3K a 55 O 43 000

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The Wholesome Time Two Random Dudes Came to See A New Baby


Back in the good old days, you could get a random text about a newborn baby and just decide to go support the mom and laugh over the wholesome randomness of it all. Wrong number text exchanges have the tendency to get weird and hilarious, and sometimes an encounter with a total stranger just has some magic in it.

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Text - 00 TFW LTE 10:49 AM 1 81% Messages (20) Group MMS Details To: .05 AM We are at the hospital. Having a baby today! She has dilated to between 5-6. Today 9:04 AM Congrats lol but I think someone got the wrong number

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Product - O 7 Ibs. 11 oz. Well I don't know Yall but me and the boys will be thru to take picture with the baby

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Text - Well I don't know Yall but me and the boys will be thru to take picture with the baby So sweet! Love his name! Congrats! Lol 0687 you are cracking me up!!! Sorry you got caught up in the baby birthing!! Nah that's okay what's the room number Bainbridge hospital right we have gifts

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Green - Lol lol 130 come on and see us. Ttyl see you soon

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Text - I accidentally text a message about Mark and Lindsey having a baby to a number I had in my phone for someone else which now belongs to Mr. his brother came by to visit us and brought the baby a gift! What a blessing these two guys were to our family. They were so sweet and kind to do this! You 2 are great guys and thank you for giving to someone you didn't know! Many blessing I pray for you. I think his brother was D s and he and ,Lindsey, & Mark thanks you. Please share this with anyone

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People - BEENTE

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Ignorant Folks Getting Slammed with Facts


It must be hard being an anti-vaxxer or flat-earther. You have to dodge so much information! Here are some folks getting hit with some satisfying displays of weaponized knowledge. For comebacks with less science and more funny, here are clever comebacks from spicy silver tongues

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Text - Your Netflix binge-watching makes climate change worse, say experts. The emissions generated by watching 30 minutes of Netflix is the same as driving almost 4 miles 36 minutes ago A server hour can cost less than 1 cent all included. Netflix can probably serve multiple customers at 1 cent per hour. Even if all that cost is energy bills (it's not, there's real estate, capital costs, and markup included), that's .1kWh. 4 miles at .411kg per milel2l is 1.6kg of co2. .1kWh of electricity at 0

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Text - Jessica Meir @Astro_ Jessica My first venture >63,000', the space equivalent zone, where water spontaneously boils! Luckily l'm suited! 10h 0:04 3 84 230 @Astro_Jessica Wouldn't say it's spontaneous. The pressure in the room got below the vapor pressure of the water at room temp. Simple thermo ithelpstodream Some guy just mansplained space to an actual fucking astronaut. tedbroiler tfw correcting misinformation is written off as mansplaining darwinquark tfw when idiots on tumblr who know

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Text - Ross Tucker @Scienceofsport 3d However, even without that recent evidence, the biological principles for separation into men's and women's categories in sport are so strong that to overturn it requires exceptional evidence (2/) 95 2767 432 Kaz Self @SelfKaz 4h Are you a biologist? Are you a scientist? Have you got a PhD? Published a paper in a peer reviewed journal? If not then STFU. O 15 Ross Tucker O @Scienceofsport Replying to @SelfKaz and @sharrond62 Yes, yes, yes and yes.

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Skin - Was trying to think of the least scary thing I could be for Halloween...so I became the measles d Would you like to accompany me on my rounds? You can tell our measles encephalitis and viral sepsis patients, the ones in comas and seizures and high fevers, that their suffering isnt all that bad and is just being exaggerated by "Big Pharma" and clueless quacks who "HaveNt DoNe THEIR RESEARCH" like me. You can even assist with the spinal tap! Read your favorite vaccine insert to them while t

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Text - B.o.B Follow @bobatl The cities in the background are approx. 16miles apart... where is the curve ? please explain this murderedbywords With the circumference of 24901 miles, you are looking at a curvature of around .2 degrees, or a little more than 10 feet at 16 miles away. May I say, that curvature is still significantly higher than your IQ. 4d 4 likes Reply Stitch It!

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Text - When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below Freezing to 300 c. The Russians used a pencil. basilton: In the early years of space flight, both Russians and Americans used pencis in space. Unfortuna

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Text - I once drank 3.5L of whiskey in one night and didn't get a hangover. I'm convinced I'm immune to them. No matter how hard I try I can't make it happen I just wanna understand why people complain about them. Like Reply 20m You want to know why something sucks? Like Reply 15m >3.5l of whiskey Sure you did Like Reply - 7m | This is one I am calling for 500, Alex. With generous assumptions (ie. assuming low proof whiskey, large body mass, etc.), 3.5L of whiskey at 33% is 65 (US) standard drin

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Text - Text - r/flatearthsociety u/KrishnasProphet ly + SUBSCRIBE 日 A Question for Ball Believers: Why Do You Believe The Earth Is Round? When everyday observations constantly reaffirm that it is Flat? Why do you believe in science without question? As a Planar Theorist, I'm genuinely curious... Edit: Given the paucity of responses so far, my suspicions that ball believers DO NOT KNOW why they believe the earth is round seem to be confirmed... 10 57 1, Share BEST COMMENTS DrDeboGalaxy • ly Gernb

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Text - Tweet Good perhaps ppl will realize that you won't die from the measles and it strengthens your immune system organically and not in some unnatural way. Ethan J. Lindenberger @ethan_Joesph16 Replying to @Nards649499551 and @FullFrontalSamB Oh man. I'm so glad 158,000 people have stronger immune systems. Oh wait...actually that's the death total of measles from 2011. 08:50 4/5/19 Twitter for iPhone ili View Tweet activity

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Text - shared post. 39 mins - ADDERALL CRYSTAL METH esteivay ar oopm For those of you who take adderall & swear you aren't a meth head. e Like Comment Share 3 As a biochemist, I have a duty to point out that the extra methyl group sticking out could increase affinity for neurotransmitter receptors by a factor of 100. possibly even in the 1000x-10000x range. That's a huge thing to consider It's this kind of affinity difference that causes carbon monoxide to kill you if it's in high enough concent

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Text - Alexander J.A Cortes @AJA_Cortes Unnatural hair colors in woman are a warning signal to stay away, Its an example Aposematism-the phenomenon of poisonous animals in nature advertising their toxicity and lethality JulieG @stringy Replying to @javafour and @Ennaaseret7 Aposematism is there to warn off predators, not sexual partners. If you're repelled by it, it's working.

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Text - Here is my completely unvaccinated boy so happy and content. With a fully functioning immune system working how it should without being compromised #vaccinefree 02 Repiying to That's a nice immune system he has there. It'd be a shame if Measles infected his macrophages, silenced his dendritic cells, and killed his memory cells wiping his learned immunity.

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Text - 65% 4:18 PM Replies ginganz13 7 months ago g Foxes are Lupine, not Canine - completely different species. The problem with putting more effort into sounding authoritative than being accurate is; you reveal that you are an idiot. 1.8K TierZoo • 6 months ago (edited) "Canine" is the layman term for all animals in the family "Canidae", which includes every animal in this list plus a few more (like the bush dog and the raccoon dog.) The problem with putting more effort into sounding smug than

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Text - Fact- if the earth was 10 ft closer to the sun we would all burn up and if it was 10 ft further we would freeze to death.. God is amazing! Sunday at 11:04am via Text Message Like Comment and 4 others like this. Wow..that's crazy! Sunday at 11:07am via Facebook Mobile Like I knooooow! Sunday at 11:08am-Like Amen Sunday at 11:08am Like to anyone wondering, that's not true. 1)Earth's orbit is eliptical and the distance from the sun varies from around 147 million kilometers to 152 million kil

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Text - + Replies + Replies п-пехапог Luke Z-Hex-3-enol This is a standard vaccine E-Hex-2-enol composition. Which of these chemicals do you object to having in your body? n-Hexyl-2-methylbutanoate n-Heptanol Camphor n-Octanol Ethanol Propyl acetate 2-Methylpropyl acetate Propanol n-Butyl acetate 2-Methylpropanol 2-Methylbutyl acetate n-Butyl propanoate n-Butanol n-Oct-2-enol 1-Methoxy-4-(2-propenyl)-benzene 24 m Like Reply Truly. Luke all of them 3 m Like Reply n-Pentyl acetate 2-Methylbut-3-eny

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Text - Your generation invented the "need" for expensive pills and potions with nasty side effects rather than taking responsibility and living with your problems. 1h Like Reply D 17 The Credible Hulk "Your generation invented the "need" for expensive pills and potions with nasty side effects rather than taking responsibility and living with your problems." - There are so many things wrong with this statement that it's difficult to know where to start. 1. The term "need" is utterly meaningless w

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Text - alex e @bahayogi Actually, soaps do help. The virus is a self-assembled nanoparticle and the weakest link is the lipid bilayer. When you wash your hands with soap it dissolves the fatty membrane and the virus falls apart thus becoming "inactive". Please wash your hands. TheeSkinnyLegend TM @MyLifeAsR.. · 1d Fun fact: antiBACTERIAL soaps that kill 99.9% of bacteria, do nothing against VIRUSES. And corona is in fact a VIRUS.

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Text - l 2degrees ? 12:14 AM Tweet Kind reminder. The X chromosome contains 1098 genes. The Y chromosome has only 78 genes. The X chromosome is over 5 times larger than the Y. Its science. Female are superior. By far. Hence hundreds of years of chauvinism to try suppress her. Goodnight. 19/02/18, 10:34 PM 19 Retweets 75 Likes Mh Replying to Onions have more DNA than humans Tweet your reply Q

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Lip care - It contains more than 4,000 chemicals and it has spread into every human body on Earth. Among its components are formaldehyde, acetone, ethanol, ketone bodies, dihydrogen monoxide, tryptophan, urea, Dehydroepiandrosterone, Hexosephosphate P, and at least 20 kinds of acids. Nearly every chemical constituent will, in certain concentrations, kill children and adults. Chemical compounds within it are also used in yoga mats, explosives, warfare, and industrial applications. It is now so pe

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Text - Dr. Phillip Binzel found an 81% cancer cure rate using liquid laetrile in apricot seeds. When he ordered this, the FDA tried to block the import of liquid laetrile in the United States. Liked by Course, pharmaceutical companies just wanna make more money :. more View All 25 Comments It was banned because ingesting it causes cyanide poisoning Imao

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