If your ultimate goal is to hack your way into being far off worse from when you first started, then by all means implement any of these failure-inducing pro tips.
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Sunday, March 12, 2017
Watch This Little Girl Nearly Get Blown Away By Strong Winds
The wind can be a cruel mistress. Sure, we think we've tamed nature's breath with windmills and air conditioning, but it's wrath has no end.
Watch what happens when this little girl triest to open her door during a strong wind. The wind grabs hold of the door and says, "Nope."
And here's the whole dang thing. Fear the wind.
Submitted by: (via NBC4)
Guy Goes Around Asking College Chicks How Long Foreplay Should Last, and Now I'm More Confused Than Ever
So basically what I'm reading here after sifting through these frustratingly wide-ranged answers is that the magical window of time when it comes to foreplay falls somewhere between 5 and 30 minutes. Ummm. Could you ladies make that any more difficult for us to get a read on?
Submitted by: (via StupidCupid)
Billy Eichner Takes Over a Stranger's Phone and, Yup, He's Roasting This Dude
Want to make Tinder more exciting, try having a famous comedian/screamer respond for you.
Billy Eichner of Billy on the Street and Parks and Recreation hijacked a Vanity Fair writer's Tinder and basically roasted the shit out of his Tinder game.
So next time you're swiping life after left, try and remember what Billy Eichner did: Message someone and remind them of the futility of life.
Submitted by: (via Vanity Fair)
Tagged: Billy Eichner , Billy On The Street
This Car Drove Through A Wall and Got Stuck Hanging On The Side of a Building
10 of the Dumbest Things People Have Ever Overheard
Don't allegedly fully functional adults with apparently reasonable amounts of brain activity just say the darndest things when taken out of context? You're bound to hear some pretty damn entertaining things if you take off the headphones next time you're walking around out in public. However, it's doubtful anything will hold a candle to these snapshots of sheer stupidity.
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Grab Your Bowtie and MAGA Hat Because Full Frontal With Samantha Bee Brings You Inside CPAC
Everyone wants to go with CPAC, the Conservative Political Action Conference. It's a chance to check in with conservative poltics, as well as see famed white supremacist and White House chief strategist, finally get to spew whatever hate he's feeling that day.
But if you don't have a bowtie or a Nazi haircut, this is your chance to see what it's all about. And, hey, you'll have a few laughs along the way.
Submitted by: (via Full Frontal with Samantha Bee)
17 Parents Who Have Mastered the Art of Trolling Their Children
Ahh, the joys of parenting. The ability to create a living, breathing, human being just to troll the shit out of them 10 years down the road is one of the most sacred rites of humanity and definitely one of the best perks of making that life choice.
One thing's for sure: These parents are doing it right.
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The Nestie Awards Are Here to Honor the Weirdest and Funniest Shit Caught By Home Surveillence Systems
The unsung heroes of the YouTube video world are finally getting some recognition. The Nestie Awards are finally handing out awards to the funniest video made by home security systems.
Home security systems are running 24/7, so there's plenty of hilarious footage that's just waiting to be awarded. So maybe instead of giving Meryl Streep another goddamn award, they give an award to someone falling through their roof.
The home automation company Nest is picking the winners, and I think I just won my office Nestie pool.
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These 13 Funny Church Signs Count as Going to Church Now, So Enjoy the Rest of Your Sunday!
Guess what? I just talked to the big man, and he said that these checking out these 13 funny church signs actually counts as going to church. Is that awesome?
So enjoy these church signs and also enjoy not spending an eternity in Hell.
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Tagged: church signs , church
Homeless Guy Builds Amazing Pimp Pad Under Freeway
"Thiis is my crib, come check it out bitches!" Homeless bro masterfully made the most out of a shit-coated, rock bottom kind of situation. If a guy living under a freeway can proceed to build a damn pimp pad, then shit, first world problems like having low phone battery while out on a Friday night, or the overpriced indie foods market not having your ritualistic almond croissant -- seem pretty damn, sickeningly petty.
Submitted by: (via Daily Exclusive)
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