Twitter is like being in a blender full of other peoples ideas. Sure there's a terrific density of thoughts in there, but it's stifling and sometimes it feels like there are spinning blades at you feet. But otherwise, it's a pretty fun place full of people's extremely thought out opinions on things like Cheetos and Star Wars. Here are some more funny tweets to grind boredom into the dirt.
Being people who live in this world, we have a lot of similar experiences dealing with our corporate masters. When it comes to something like a fancy bottled water brand, they know that we know that their super special alkaline water really just comes from a tap in Cleveland. But they never admit it. So here are some people's ideas of what the world would look like if brands just would just be that much more honest.
When his partner Greg Harlow mentioned the prospects of this shot at the World Indoor Bowls Championships, the crowd laughed at the unlikelihood of turning it around. What followed was Nick Brett rolling in a perfectly aimed shot that is so satisfying that you want to watch it twice.
Is there any reason to not like Weird Al? Actually there is. If you're tasteless, hate quality humor, and can't stand to look at the face of brilliance, Weird Al might not be for you. But moments like these, in addition to his terrific body of work, are what make us love him.
Working retail and having to appease a Karen is not a fun time, but when you realize she's not even a customer of the place you're working at? That's a recipe for a good time. This employee had a run-in with a Karen they didn't even have to make happy, and proceeded to watch her own comedy of errors unfold.
There's a rich history of bosses orchestrating their own downfall and this one is a stellar example. This lady's genius idea was to make their product crappier while keeping prices high and treating staff like garbage. Where could that go wrong? Some bosses make it clear right away that playing along won't be worth it. Here are some job listing horror stories as well as reasons people quit their jobs on the first day.
The internet is a big place with all kinds of people who have amazing and dumb ideas, and boy if it isn't rife with stupid, random and brilliant Tumblr gems. People have hard opinions on architecture, werewolves and plastic chairs, and they leave these observations laying around like rats at the dump. It's a good time. There's always Tumblr gems to rifle through like a goblin.
When we're younger, we never think of ourselves as future old people. When you're 19, sleeping two hours a night and being an idiot, it's extremely hard to imagine yourself as someone with back pain and a lawn that these DAMN KIDS WON'T STOP PLAYING ON. It can happen suddenly. Most people can point to the moment they realized they were old. At least as people age they get to pride themselves on knowing things young people wouldn't get.
We know just enough about evolutionary biology to ascertain that these memes about cell development and terrestrial vertebrates are probably pretty funny to someone. Thank goodness for those stupid natural world credits we had to take to graduate. Now where are the memes we get to understand for taking that 3 credit course on volcanos? Here are some more vaguely scientific memes for nerds.
In a food service setting, it's important to take people's food preferences seriously. It's a thing that gets brought up a lot like this educational tumblr thread about a vegan girl being served a real burger. The thing is, this stance assumes that the person ordering said particular food actually knows what their choice entails. So what exactly do you do when a customer claims an allergy and then contradicts themselves? The story let people explain other times they've been just as confused by people who had a limited understanding of what different food actually is.
The sad thing is that as obvious a scam as this is, the reason they keep doing it is because someone has fallen for it. There's probably some poor dude out there waiting for that Monster logo to put on their car, still hoping that they didn't just fall for a completely dumb scam. For another guy who got clever with it, here's a scammer who claimed to be a CEO and got trolled.
It's a troubling tale like the one that we have here that can effortlessly convince someone to never consider taking up babysitting. You very well could end up having to deal with an aggressive, downright blindly ignorant individual like the mother in this story. I'm just trying to figure out why she continued to bother the babysitter with the pointless calls. Some people have a way of completely disregarding the very undeniable truth when they're repeatedly told it.
Scientists are people. And being people, they don't take their work as seriously as they maybe should. So naturally, we get things like extremely important primate language studies conducted by people who name their chimp "Nim Chimpsky." Hey, as long as the research is good. Here's a tumblr thread about the use of lucky shrines in the field of science.
Why do dads love puns? Because the other jokes they want to say are so disrespectful and abhorrently filthy that if they said them, no one would trust them with children. You make do with what you have. In the end, we have punny dad jokes that go father than ever before. So throw on those jeans, pile the kids into the car, drive to the soccer game and patiently sit through daderrific dad jokes that just nailed it.
It's pretty cool how people are willing to help each other out, even if the only thing they have in common is that they're from a similar part of the earth. Hey, people like building connections. It must be interesting to be in a completely new place and run into someone who just left the place that you came from. A lot of good can come from saying "I also understand that it's weird here, do you want to hang out?" For some more wholesomeness, here are wholesome memes.
