Clever College Chick Gets Revenge After Being Told to "Stop Walking Around Braless" in Her Dorm

Dorm life is a double edged blade of debauchery ^{(cool dnd item name btw)} and dissonance. I guess that's what happens when you cram a bunch of barely post-adolescent young adults -who have never taken care of themselves on their own- into close quarters living conditions. It's like a poorly optimized training simulator for adulthood.

Some of us were too focused on video games and consumption to learn any real lessons from this time of our lives but we all get their at some point. 

Anyways, we love a little petty revenge and kudos to this lass for getting the ol' leg up on the competition in this edition of _Malicious. ^Compliance.

Ridiculous Wedding FAILs That Were Brought About By Poor Choices

Weddings. Events designed for debauchery and poor decision making.

There's something about the atmosphere and temporality of a wedding that leads us to do things that we wouldn't normally do. Nothing like being in a room filled with someone else's family and varied strangers to make you forget your senses. One thing is certain at weddings... there is bound to be some drama.

These classic wedding blunders are sure to get a cringe or a chuckle. 

Dude On Street Does Excellent Michael Jackson, Syncs Up Perfectly

The guy has our undivided attention for his perfectly in-time Michael Jackson-ing. Who knows how much time he spends practicing, but it seems like a lot. It's as if music is always inside him, just waiting to explode out onto the streets.

School Band Is Delightfully Horrible

Props to that kid for starting off solo, but man there's no way to prepare yourself for when the rest of the band kicks in. Either way it's still better than what we could do.

Weird And Uncomfortable Cursed Images To Cringe The Night Away

The internet belongs to everyone, so naturally, a whole lotta wild junk goes down there. Peering into the unguarded psyche of random strangers isn't just uncomfortable, it can also be hard to look at. And with the help of cursed images, we can make ourselves uncomfortable at a moment's notice. It's not clear why we feel compelled to look at this strangeness. Maybe we're masochists. Maybe we're just dumb. Either way, here's that.

Dad Gets Daughter Hyped For Freddie Mercury Biopic, Forgets to Tell Her the Singer is Dead and Ruins Her Life

As far as "horrible things your parents could do to you" goes this one is pretty harmless. Pretty epic of the Dad to manage to get his kids hyped about Freddie and Queen without somehow managing to tell them of his untimely, tragic passing.

Being a fan of Queen without knowing Freddie was dead would be like getting to watch Star Wars again for the first time without knowing that iconic line... 

"No, I am your father..."

u/Kage11217 has nailed it on the head here. My feelings exactly. 

"It's such a bizarre feeling when you watch someone discover a fact or idea that you just took for granted that it was universal knowledge." - Kage11217

Company Fires Employee For Opening 99 Cent Tea Before Paying

Customers will open up food and drinks before paying all the time. But evidently, when an employee does the same thing, this enormous corporation can't handle it. Who could expect a giant company to properly deal with the unimaginable infraction of an employee cracking open an Arizona in line so that they can fit it into their lunch break? For some more work BS, here's the unhinged manager who fired an employee after asking for a raise.

Tumblr Thread: The Very Real Cliché Of Bed Scarcity

As much as it sounds like something out of badly written erotica, the concept of "but there's only one bed" is a situation that may of us have found ourselves in. And in the case of one such Tumblr user, a moment of bed scarcity actually led them to a wildly better outcome than sleeping on a couch. For some more moments of Tumblr trying to break down relationships as if they were the plot to the Incredibles, here's the thread on how humans fail miserably at identifying flirting.

Dejected Former Employee Nukes His Entire Catalogue of Work Years After Getting Fired

This guy definitely knew what he had to do when he stumbled across the folder of his old work years after being fired from his gig for asking for a raise. When placed in such a position what would you do?

For various ethical and legal reasons it's probably not the wisest move to go full nuclear and kick a nest full of hornets but someimes you have to do what you have to do. 

There seem to be lots of people telling stories at the moment about when they were fired for asking for a raise. I wonder if there is anything to the trend?

Funny Tweets And Tumblr Gems To Bust Up The Monotony

We live in the future now, so why should we ever have to deal with hearing the burden of our own thoughts? Something about that voice in our heads isn't cutting it. Our internal monologues aren't as snappy as we'd like them to be. That's why we have funny tweets and tumblr gems to kick things up a few notches. Take that, inner monologue!

Company Tries Tricking Employee Into Working 22 Hours In 36 Hour Frame, Quits

It's common practice for companies to try and take advantage of their most responsible employees, which leads them to wonder why they can't hold on to those responsible employees. Plus it smells a lot like this guy's bosses were just trying to bully him for putting in his two weeks notice. Here's the time an employee got overworked, demanded to be fired, and watched as the business imploded.

Step-Father Uses Recently Deceased Step-Son’s Medical Fund to Go On A Golfing Trip While Mother Grieves

This one doesn't even have room for consideration. What an absolute, condemnable, piece of garbage. Words can't even describe the horrors that await him when karma gets its due. 

How, on this good-gracious earth, would you even consider the fact that something like this was possible? It just boggles the mind.

Relationships are hard but next time you need to go get a stress relief buddy... maybe don't use the dead kid's fund to play a game of golf. Ok?

 

Boss Tries to Force Worker to Come in on His Day Off, Backpedals When Guy Quits on the Spot

The illusion of power is absolutely real. The idea that someone can consider themselves to be above you just because of some thinly-veiled title is usually laughable and easily breaks when put to the test. 

Guys like this manager fold like a house of cards when you put up any resistance and show their true hand for what it is. 

Good on u/42words for hitting hard and fast by quitting on the spot. Great to see another worker get a leg up on their abusive bosses. 

This Wife Has Had Enough of Her Immature Husband Who Can’t Even Turn Off a Faucet on His Own

I probably go off on this tangent a little too often but it's just consistently amazing the things that people can just fail to pickup when they're going through the training simulator of life. Like, did you know there are people out there who wipe while standing up? (More on this divisive topic sure to come.) 

There have been some real relationship deal breakers in the pastbut it's astounding that someone could have survived for this extended length of time without even learning to turn off a faucet. But then, according to my girl friend, I'm incapable of closing a cupboard door. So who am I to judge.

Chaotic Times People Were Struck By Mishaps And Misfortune

Nobody said life was going to be easy, but also nobody said that your kayak could melt if you left it in the sun. Life finds an amazingly diverse number of ways to screw us over with blunders, goofs, mistakes, failures and chaos. There's no way to prevent all of it, so when a coconut falls through your windshield, your best option is probably just to tell yourself "this happens to other people too" and take noteto not park there again.