Sunday, November 8, 2020

Tumblr Post: Barista Encounters Real Life Mad Hatter


Man, anyone who has ever worked a customer service job will appreciate the fact that you never know what kind of craziness you're bound to encounter on a shift. It could be juggling customers' mythologically strong coffee orders, or it could be having to work with someone who is the pure example of chaotic good. Always something new in the life of a barista. 

1.

Text - taylortut y'all know that john mulaney quote "the things crazy people say mean nothing to them but everything to me?" every time i hear that quote, i think about how i got this light-up pen

2.

Text - taylor-tut i got this pen four years ago when i was working as a barista at starbucks. I was on the registers and taking the order of this woman, who ordered a nonfat latte, because she was "watching her weight" so this guy behind her, whom no one was talking to, for some fucking reason says "wathing your weight? but what about the wait for your watch?" (which is a completely unhinged response. like just complete Mad Hatter nonsense)

3.

Text - anyway this lady gets really uncomfortable and of the five people (me, him, her, the other checker, and the customer at the other register) who were now sucked into the uncomfortable silence, i decided that i should alleviate the tension by saying "you can't wait for a watch; you don't have the time" and then he said "oh, quick girl!", gave me that pen, got out of line, and left without ordering anything patron-saint-of-smart-asses You pleased a mad fae trickster

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A Humorously Mild Taste of LaCroix Tweets


Sparkling water is a decisive topic. Some appreciate a light alternative to juice and soda, and everyone else demands to know where the flavor is. It's hard for many of us to spend money on a product whose selling point is that there's almost nothing in it, and that generates some pretty hilarious complaints. For more twitter stuff, here are funny tweets to give that day a boost.

1.

Text - Brandon Sutton @PrettyBadLety La Croix tastes like the only soft drink they'd allow in a dystopian future where no one is allowed to have emotions 4:48 PM - Feb 10, 2018 148K Q 33.6K people are talking about this

2.

Text - MehGyver @AndrewNadeauo Every La Croix flavor tastes like it was created by someone who didn't want to admit he'd never tasted fruit so had a friend quickly describe it to him. 6:50 PM - Feb 12, 2018 O 281 Q81 people are taliking about this

3.

Text - Mike Ingram @mikeingram00 I guess the question I have for people who love LaCroix is have you tried any other beverages 13 Feb Mike Ingram @mikeingram00 LaCroix tastes like it was made by a society in which flavor is the scarcest natural resource 2:03 PM - Feb 14, 2018 8 8 See Mike Ingram's other Tweets

4.

Text - jaboukie young-black @jaboukie lacroix is like drinking sprite with a condom 2:32 PM - Feb 13, 2018 · Los Angeles, CA O 31.2K 9 5,934 people are talking about this

5.

Text - Wonder Bread *Something bad happens Me "oh boy Someone drinking LaCroik: "oh boix

6.

Text - stephanie duclos @stephanieducli Im drinking La Croix now pls refer to me in the formal usted 7/4/18, 4:09 PM

7.

Text - Ryan Reynoldso La Croix has just enough flavor to piss me off 718/18, 627 PM

8.

Text - Some LaCroix flavors I've been working on: 1. There was kiwi in the fridge next to this. 2. I ate a single grape last night. 3. Essence of fruit cup lid. 4. Here's a drawing of a strawberry. 5. I had a dream about lemon peels. 6. Banana Mist. 7. Mango from a bag with a large hole in the bottom. New for fall: 8. Pumpkin Spice Latte mentioned in a text message.

9.

Text - peanut butter chocolate cake @deliagrantham la croix tastes like someone ate a fruit salad and then burped into your water bottle 4:43 PM - Feb 11, 2018 O 141 Q 49 people are talking about this

10.

Text - Daniel Tran @Daanieltran La Croix tastes like if you were drinking carbonated water and someone screamed out loud the name of a specific fruit in the other room

11.

Text - Pitch O Follow @pitchjokes new lacroix flavors! -transported in a truck near bananas -hint of hint of lime -single skittle dissolved in water -shy watermelon -imagine like, a strawberry but with low battery 4:30 PM - 13 Jun 2018

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Student Exploits Every Loophole In School Dress Code


Sometimes school staff doesn't exactly have a consistent policy, like the time staff made a student patiently wait to report a fire. After some absolute BS rule nitpicking by the staff, this person decided to read up on the rules and dress with extreme panache. Sometimes students get the best of their teachers, like this student who made a mockery of a robotics competition with a dry ice loophole.

1.

Text - r/MaliciousCompliance · Posted by u/TandyAngie 12 hours ago 2 A W 2 6 4 384 O 8 4 & Nitpick the dress code? I can do that too. oC L Our junior high dress code was a pain. Most teachers didn't care so long as kids weren't distracting. The principal of the junior high, however, insisted on enforcing every single rule. A friend of mine wore a long sleeve shirt under a tank top. The principal insisted she couldn't wear the tank top because tank tops were against the dress code. But she couldn

2.

Text - I decided this wouldn't stand. I studied every rule in the dress code to prove how stupid it was. I started off small and worked my way up. No open toed sandals. - This one was easy. I wore open toed high heels. Nothing in the rules against high heels, and the open toed rule only applied to sandals the way it was written. Shirts must be tucked in to pants. Belts must be worn through belt loops. - Knocked out two here by wearing a skirt. Skirts, or at least the one I wore, had no belt loop

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Text - Backpacks must be plain colored with no pins/excessive accessories. - I picked up a briefcase from a resale shop and slapped it with every sticker I could find. Any random logo or inspirational sticker I had laying around got slapped on it. Technically, a briefcase isn't a backpack. No costumes allowed. (I verified this, my school considered a costume to be anything only worn for a certain period of time or for a certain reason. If you wore it all day, it was an outfit, not a costume.) -

4.

Text - No crazy hairstyles. - Kept my hair natural colors, and kept the styles as something that was at least popular at one point. Beehive took forever but was the most satisfying. Bonus points if I could find pictures of adults who were still wearing their hair like that currently. Shirts are not allowed to have logos or print, only patterns and consistent designs. - Consistent designs was my loophole here. No print, fine, but consistent print made specifically to look like a design? At this p

5.

Text - Gym shorts must teach students knees or as long as their fingertips. - Guess who's finger tips reach about three below her butt? Me! I went from wearing a shirt that said bite me all over it, to an outfit that included short shorts. But my shorts were still longer than my fingers. I even offered to change back into my other clothes. At this point in the year, we were almost done with school. Other kids were following my lead, and we were driving the principal mad. I decided to kick it up

6.

Text - No tank tops. - I wore a dress with spaghetti straps. It wasn't a shirt, so I wasn't breaking a rule. Belts must be plain with no dangerous materials. - Plain it must be, so plain I went. I wore a shoe string as a belt. I wore a braided yarn string as a belt. I even wore a spandex band sewn to my pants as a belt. No crocs. - Crocs are not the only rubber shoe my friends. I found every off brand croc I could get a hold of. Finally, at the end of the year, I wore one of my most outrageous o

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Text - Kids paused to see what would happen. I waited to see what she would say. We'd had this conversation all year. She would point out the rule I 'broke' and I would prove how I didn't. She sighed. Principal- Fine, but if even one teacher says you're distracting to the class, you change clothes. We shook on it. Only thing I had to ditch was most of the bangles. They kept clanging while I wrote. In the end, I ended up getting the dress code rewritten and amended and the principal implemented a

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Tagged: school , loophole , lol , clothes , dress , funny

Entitled Influencer Expects Free Lodging, Owner Shuts Her Down


Man oh man, these entitled human beings and their unyielding series of demands just keep on coming out of the woodwork. It seems as if it'll never end. We'll always have the next person ready to ruin an otherwise reasonable and peaceful series of negotiations with nothing short of pure delusional entitlement. In this case, we have an influencer who expects free accommodations in exchange for offering the hotel some exposure. Let's just say she was not nearly established enough for that to even be within the realm of consideration. 

Check out some more absurd demands of entitled people over here.

1. It all starts with a wonderful, entitled email.

Text - Hi there, I hope this email finds you well. I'm emailing in regards to a possible collaboration on social media - my name is I work as a social media influencer, mainly lifestyle, beauty & travel based. I have over 87.000 YouTube subscribers (here: as well as 76 000 Instagram followers -

2.

Text - My partner and I are planning to come to Dublin for an early Valentines Day weekend from Feb 8th - 12th to explore the area. As I was searching for places to stay, I came across your stunning hotel and would love to feature you in my YouTube videos/dedicated Instagram stories/posts to bring traffic to your hotel and recommend others to book up in return for free accommodation. Last year I worked with Universal Orlando in Florida and it's been amazing for them! Let me know if this is somet

3. And then, here comes the boom from a fed up owner.

Text - The White Moose Café WHE MOO 16 January 2018 * Dear Social Influencer (I know your name but apparently it's not important to use names), Thank you for your email looking for free accommodation in return for exposure. It takes a lot of balls to send an email like that, if not much self-respect and dignity.

4.

Text - If I let you stay here in return for a feature in your video, who is going to pay the staff who look after you? Who is going to pay the housekeepers who clean your room? The waiters who serve you breakfast? The receptionist who checks you in? Who is going to pay for the light and heat you use during your stay? The laundering of your bed sheets? The water rates? Maybe I should tell my staff they will be featured in your video in lieu of receiving payment for work carried out while you're i

5.

Text - Lucky for us, we too have a significant social media following. We have 186k followers on our two Facebook pages, an estimated 80k on our Snapchat, 32k on Instagram and a paltry 12k on our Twitter, but Jesus Christ, I would never in a million years ask anyone for anything for free. I also blog a bit which as far as I'm aware is another way of saying "write stuff on the internet". The above stats do not make me any better than anyone else or afford me the right to not pay for something eve

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Text - In future, l'd advise you to offer to pay your way like everyone else, and if the hotel in question believes your coverage will help them, maybe they'll give you a complimentary upgrade to a suite. This would show more self-respect on your part and, let's face it, it would be less embarrassing for you. Here is a little video | produced which you may learn from:

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White - Best regards, Paul Stenson P.S. The answer is no. O 42K 11K comments 5K shares

8. After the owner faced some backlash, they doubled down.

Text - The White Moose Café WHI MOOS 17 January 2018 - * **ALL BLOGGERS BANNED FROM OUR BUSINESS** Following the backlash received after asking an unidentified blogger to pay for a hotel room, I have taken the decision to ban all bloggers from our hotel and cafe.

9.

Text - The sense of entitlement is just too strong in the blogging community and the nastiness, hissy fits and general hate displayed after one of your members was not granted her request for a freebie is giving your whole industry a bad name. I never thought we would be inundated with negative reviews for the simple reason that somebody was required to pay for goods received or services rendered.

10.

Text - The girl in question was never identified in my original post, but she herself went on to create a video explaining how she was "exposed" with "malicious intent" for asking for a freebie. This kind of victimization is very prevalent in the blogging industry, and is in keeping with their general modus operandi of wanting everything for nothing.

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Text - If any of you attempt to enter our premises from now on, you will be ejected. Many thanks, Paul Stenson www.charlevillelodge.ie P.S. Perhaps if you went out and got real jobs you'd be able to pay for goods and services like everybody else. Just a thought! 51K 7.4K comments 1.5K shares

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Tumblr Story: Kids Go Full Chaotic Good To Help Barista


Every now and again the wonderful beings of the Tumblr world deliver a quick, impactful, wholesome story that hits us right in the feels-plex. In this case, we hear about a barista who worked in a rough part of town, but ended up being helped out by some kids that went full "chaotic good" mode. Seriously, picking a lock to help take the trash out is about as chaotic good as it comes. 

For another Tumblr thread about the world of coffee serving, check out this thread about customers' mythically powerful coffee orders.

1.

Text - undercover-underdog For those of you who don't know, I work at an anarchist co-op coffee shop. Apparently, all the Chicano/Cholo boys in my neighborhood have caught on the the fact that I sneak food and stuff to all the little punk kids and homeless kids at the coffee shop. There are three in particular who call me Mom. Not Mami, not Ma, Mom. The rest refer to me as "Miss".

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Text - They've decided to always have one of the three of them there with me on my night shifts. (Especially after they witnessed the last bad shift where I had to kick a bunch of tweakers out. Said tweakers lit my fucking bulletin board on fire.) Tonight, one of the boys actually charged up a crackhead who wouldn't get out when I told him to leave. About an hour later, I was emptying bus tubs when that same lovely boy walked in and wetted a wash rag. I asked what he was doing and he told me not

3.

Text - I'd left a broom in the smoking room and a fresh trash bag in the bathroom for once I was done with the dishes. When I walked out, everything was spotless and the trash had been replaced. He'd wiped all my tables, swept, mopped, and emptied all the ash trays. He'd also picked the lock on the bathroom so his friend could take out the trash for me. (Which I'm not sure whether I should scold him for. Haha)

4.

Text - They snuck around and did my closing shift duties to thank me for keeping them warm and fed. I'm fucking crying. spaffy-jimble Kindness begets kindness. orc-lady-unabi Picking a lock so you can take out trash for someone who's nice to you is the most chaotic good thing i've ever heard. <3

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Manager Lies To Employee, Employee Embarrasses Manager


Man, this manager sounds like a slimy, lying piece of work. They totally led their employee on with the whole commission structure, but their employee had the nerve to call them out when it all came down to it. Being able to turn that letter of resignation in right when everything came to a head must've been immensely satisfying.

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Text - r/pettyrevenge + Join u/DownrightDrewski • 2d Idiot manager lies to new employee, and then gets made to look silly in front of most of his team. I was working at a dodgy retail place where l'd been told I could earn commission, and they'd told me how that worked. You had to hit a particular figure, but once you had you got commission on everything (I was very careful to clarify that this included the threshold amount, not just everything over that figure). The figure was pretty high for w

2.

Text - This place was miserable, it was basically a high street pawn shop in the UK - and the manager was an utter cockwomble. However; I was young, needed a job and thought I could earn ok money with commission. Get a couple of weeks in and I hit the threshold for the first time - great! Keep hitting it in the following weeks whilst I'm waiting for that first paycheck with my nice little commission bonus pay to start rolling in. I get the first pay slip with the commission, my jaw drops and cru

3.

Text - I wrote my letter of resignation accepting that I had to give a week's notice and then work it. Annoying, but not really an issue. I did think it would be fun to call him on it though, and not just in private, but in front of as many staff as possible. Fortunately we had a daily "staff meeting" where we basically stood around for a couple if minutes - perfect time. At the end of the day I seize my chance Me = me CWM = cockwomble manager: Me "Why did you tell me commission was on the full

4.

Text - Me "Yes you did, if you remember I specifically clarified this with you - it's the main reason I took the job" CWM "I didn't say that" shouting a bit by this point Me "Yes you did, I wouldn't be here if you hadn't" CWM "You're calling me a liar? You're fired! Me "Funny that, I was about to give you this" I then pulled out my letter of notice and showed it to him - to my immense satisfaction this was met with a round of applause from most of the rest of the staff. The best bit though? Beca

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Power Tripping Assistant Manager Gets Put In Check


It's people like Fran that give the assistant managers of the world a bad rap. In this case, we see Fran express no level of sympathy and understanding for her absolutely exhausted employee who was fresh off an overnight shift. But alas, as will happen, the employee hit their breaking point, and decided to put into play some delightful malicious compliance. Fortunately, that malicious compliance ends up serving as the catalyst for getting Fran out of the business. 

Check out some more juicy malicious compliance content with this lying Karen who used her old employer as a reference, and then it backfired terribly.

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Text - r/MaliciousCompliance + Join u/fredzred • 176d 1 "Clean the store TOP TO BOTTOM. Don't leave until you do." yes boss ... L This happened when I worked in retail around 2005 (I was 15). I was working at a very small grocery store and although it was a small store we were always busy, as it was near a popular beach and along a highway rest area. The night before, l'd worked from 12am until 6am packing shelves (there was a huge delivery coming in that had to be stocked for the next day). I w

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Text - At 12pm that afternoon (6 hours after finishing the packing shift and barely getting 5 hours of sleep) I got a call from the assistant manager (Fran) who wanted me to come in to work a shift. I explained that l'd just finished a shift and had only had a few hours sleep. FRAN: "But the other girl has called in sick and you're the closest person." (I lived in the motel next door. My family were managing the motet at this point). ME: (too naive to know that I didn't legally have to come in a

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Text - I got dressed and walked like a zombie to the store. When I arrived we were extremely quiet, with the occasional customer every 10 minutes or so. I was surprised she called me in at all, considering that even on a busy day, 1 person can run the store on their own. FRAN: (around 2pm) "I'm going on my break. Will you clean the store while I'm gone?" I picking up a duster, knelt down on my knees and proceeded to dust underneath the shelves (It had been thoroughly cleaned during the 6 hour pa

4.

Text - ME: "Why can't you do it? l'm exhausted and l'm doing my best not to fall asleep on the spot." (l'd informed her that l'd done the midnight packing shift). FRAN: "You have to do it. I have a bad back." Fran then proceeded to grab the duster and lean down (against OH&S bending guidelines) and dusted underneath the shelf to demonstrate. Making it look easy for someone who "claimed" to have a bad back. FRAN: "I'm going on my 15 minute break and by the time I come back I want the floors to be

5.

Text - Queue the malicious compliance. I started cleaning under EVERY shelf and EVERY display like my life depended on it, and a few minutes after Fran had left, costumers began to trickle in. But I was under STRICT instructions to ONLY clean under the shelves. Customers began to cue at the register (this was before there was self serve registers). CUSTOMER: (after noticing I was there but not serving them) "Hello? Are you working? Can I get some service please?" ME: "I'm so sorry Sir." (bringin

6.

Text - The customer stormed out of the store and a few minutes later, came back with Fran in toe (she had been outside smoking). CUSTOMER: (addressing Fran) "This poor young lady is in tears because you threatened her job. Fran, you have to stop doing this to your staff. Frank (the manager in charge of Fran) will be hearing about this." ME: (feeling brave an empowered by this) "I TOLD you I'm working on 5 hours of sleep after working all might with Frank packing shelves. I'm going to go home to

7.

Text - It turned out that that customer was one of Frank's close friends and was the driver of the tour bus that arrived every day. I turned up to work my regular shift the next day and explained to Frank everything that had happened and how Fran had treated me. He told me to go back to work and he would take care of it. Fran got a HARSH talking to about her behavior and conduct in the work place and was let go. This was her FINAL warning, as she had been doing this for months to other staff mem

8.

Text - I never saw Fran in work uniform after that but she did come in from time to time to buy groceries (we were the only grocery store in the area, apart from a takeaway shop). I'd always give the same "Hi. Welcome to [store location]. How are you today?" with the BIGGEST grin on my face. Boy was that sweet! 12.2k 374 1 Share

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