The 34 Biggest "F You's" in History

These historical figures delivered the ultimate 'F You's" to their rivals and adversaries. Using dastardly and elaborate methods (and carefully crafted turns of phrase) they managed to deliver some absolutely savage responses. 

Tolkien is famous for his rebuttal to a publisher in Nazi Germany who sought confirmation that he was of Aryan descent. The author used his gift for words to write a brilliant response honoring the Jewish people and effectively telling the Nazis to shove it.

Redditors gathered on this r/AskReddit thread to share their examples of what they felt were the best and biggest moments of this in history. There's also one example that a random person felt like sharing where they got nuclear revenge on their cousin who kept stealing their boyfriends. So, yeah, that's a thing too.

Is there an example that isn't included in this thread? Let us know in the comments!
 

Scroll on for this collection of "Ask Reddit" responses. 

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Workers Reveal Secrets from their Professions that the General Public would be Shocked to know

Every industry has their secrets

Interviewer Makes Inappropriate Moves on Candidate, Blames Her When He Gets Fired

There's a strict code of professionalism that needs to be followed when undertaking job interviews. It's a situation that often has a significant power discrepancy, and the person being interviewed is usually nervous as all hell. Under no circumstances should you start asking a candidate highly personal and intimate questions about themselves.

Well, this code of professionalism is one that this idiot interview refused to follow when he decided it was ok for him to start into the personal topics with this poor woman. His questions ranged from across the line to highly inappropriate, even going as far to ask "what type of dudes [she liked]." Unsurprisingly, he was fired on the spot when she reported her experience to his superior. Now he's pissed off at her for "having him fired" and has even saved her personal details and tried to contact her. Like, dude, what?

The woman who was interviewed, Redditor u/R_Rover_2013, posted this thread to Reddit's r/AITA (Am I the A-hole) subreddit in order to see if she was in the wrong for getting this interviewer fired. 

Commenters overwhelmingly sided with her, and several pointed out that his actions got him fired. She just reported them. 

It doesn't sound like this guy is the type to learn anything from this experience, but hopefully, he'll eventually realize that his consequences are of his own actions.

Screenshots to follow.

The Dumbest Coworkers People had the Privilege of Working Side by Side With

There's not a single thought in their head

Twitter Users Share Stupid Reasons They Took Their Pet to the Vet

People care about their pets, like a lot. So it's no question that a lot of us have stories about rushing a pet to the vet at the slightest indication that something is wrong. The problem with animals is that they don't talk, so unless you have a really smart parrot, your not going to be able to grill them about where exactly their stomach hurts. As it so happens, it's not uncommon for people to rush their distressed pet to a medical professional and throw down a few hundred bucks to be told "yeah, sometimes they're like that."

It's definitely good to have the peace of mind that your dog isn't dying and that it actually sat on a dead bee and freaked out for four hours, but at the same time, really dude? You couldn't have just told me that was your issue? We could have had this solved hours ago if you just spoke up.

25 Hilariously Specific Times People and Things Were Singled Out

Sometimes it's just not your day. It could be because of something you did, like eat everyone's lunches, that has made you into the pariah of the workplace. But more often than not, you'll just be minding your own business when you see a sign that says "you suck." And all you can really do at that point is shrug your shoulders and say "I knew the universe was out to get me. Every paranoid thought I ever had about the world has just been confirmed, and I should now choose to follow my invasive thoughts all the way down to the one logical conclusion."

It doesn't feel very good to be singled out, but at the same time, watching someone else get singled out can be pretty funny. Especially if you can really tell that it's actively causing them longstanding psychological harm.

Here are some more humorously absurd times people and things got singled out.

Parent Brings Disruptive Baby To Child-Free Wedding, Doesn't Understand Why They're In The Wrong

So this parent was invited to a wedding that explicitly asked for no kids to be present. Instead of taking the time to make any arrangements, they decided that this rule didn't apply to them, and did a "write-in" on their RSVP about how they were bringing a baby anyway. Of course the baby cried during the ceremony, and now they're in massive denial about having been the asshole in this situation. It's frankly amazing watching people try to bend reality in their favor.

And their defense? "I didn't mean to start any drama." Claims of intent don't really mean anything when you've already successfully demonstrated to everyone around you that you're not going to listen to their wishes. Sometimes it's hard for people to understand that they're not the main character of life itself, and it's kind of a shame.

Maybe having hundreds of people on the internet explain in excruciating detail what they did wrong will help them see what's up, but you can never be too sure.

33 People's Dumbest "Oh No, You're Not Kidding" Moments

It's easy to find yourself in a situation where you're pretty sure the other person is being dumb or insane, but they're so confident about it that it makes you question your own reality. 

When someone says something so uncouth, absurd or straight up dumb that we just can't believe them, it's reasonable to assume that they're just joking. When some dude says "do you want confetti on your fries" our brains do the social math and land on "haha, that would be crazy." But then when that same dude gets upset and says "why are you laughing at me, confetti is my favorite food" you're put into a corner where there's no graceful way out. So you shrug and go "fine dude. I guess go ahead and give me the piñata fries, extra birthday."

For some more humbling moments, here are satisfyingly times people witnessed someone's ego get crushed.

Guy Gets Call From Debt Collector About Ex-Wife's Debt, Leaves Them 600 Voicemails as Revenge

Divorce is never final, whether it's because of the kids, ongoing financial disputes, or just fending off a salty ex, it's going to haunt you. That being said… there are those who have spit who somehow manage to make it work and still be friends and props to those people. They are gods among us. 

Well, this guy, Redditor u/Nerd_Law, is continuing to be haunted by his ex-wife, from who he split eight years ago. Not over children or hard feelings but certainly over her finances.

He keeps receiving phone calls from a debt collection agency that is trying to reach his ex-wife in order to recover her debts. These companies infamously have no boundaries and will call your best friend from first grade if it means that they have a shot of hitting payday.

He was absolutely fed up with this situation and decided that a little revenge was in order to balance the scales. 

Karen Demands Nonexistent Mystery Muffins, Manager Demands New-Hire Finds Them

You've just started working your brand new job at the muffin shop (Yeah, I know it's a cafe -same thing) you're full of that fresh youthful vigor that comes along with starting a job in a new place and looking forward to what the day brings. 

"Oh boy! Can't wait to sell some muffins!" You think to yourself as your manager, Steve, sets you up to run the Front of House. 

Your first customers of the day come in and you greet them with a cheery smile. Right off the bat, they're not reciprocating your attempts to be friendly to a fellow human being. You're just there to serve them, why would they owe you a shred of human decency?

They're demanding and entitled and begin asking for things that don't actually exist. As things escalate they demand to see Steve, who is frustrated at you now for bothering him, and proceeds to take Karen's side to save face and avoid conflict. 

Now you're stuck between a brick wall and an angry bear with no way to escape and no solution to the problem at hand. 

Repeat this daily and soon you, like any other retail or service worker, are dead inside behind your forced facade of a smile.

See screenshots of this brilliant tale of retail malicious compliance below. 

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Family Visiting Thailand Accidentally Stays at a Brothel After Stubborn Dad Refuses to Use AirBnb

And then when they left the brothel to stay somewhere else, the dad picked a place infested with ants… 

Funny Tweets To Decimate That Clawing Boredom

Everyone has this obsession with the "marketplace of ideas." As if there's this mythical perfect place where only good ideas rise to the top and bad ideas sink into obscurity. But with the internet, it's less of a marketplace and more like a WWE Royal Rumble. Popularity begets popularity, there are new useless and horrible ones thrown into the mix all the time, there aren't really any actual rules to speak of, and no matter who you talk to, everyone says everything used to be better when they were a kid.

So let's not kid ourselves into thinking that everyone's stupid thoughts getting smooshed into the ether at random is really all that productive. But the beauty of constant chaos is that it can get pretty funny. So at least we have that consolation. Hey man, at least it's not boring.

Here are some funny tweets to viscously unleash upon boredom.

Woman Invites Her Partner to 'Girl's Night', Refuses to Let Any Other Partners Come, Gets Mad When Internet Tells Her She's Wrong

When everyone is telling you that you're wrong and not looking at a situation correctly… At what point do you take a step back and reflect internally?

It's repeatedly surprising how many people lack the ability for this introspection and it occurred in this train-wreck of a post on Reddit's r/AITA (Am I the A--Hole) subreddit over the weekend. 

The poster of the topic u/fern_mounds posted a topic to the popular subreddit to share the story of the current drama that has been unfolding in her friend group.

The friends are organizing their first post-covid party, which is set to take place at her house. She wants her partner to attend the proceedings since her partner is a woman and these gatherings have traditionally been 'Girl's Nights.'

Her friends want to bring their partners too, rationalizing that either all partners are able to attend or none at all. For some reason, the poster has been completely unable to wrap her head around this point and can't rationalize that the point of a 'Girl's Night' has always been that partners don't attend. She's completely focused on the fact that the gender of her partner should qualify her for the event. 

Admittedly the term 'Girl's Night' is incredibly exclusionary and growing increasingly outdated in modern social circles. 'Friend's Night', or 'No Partner Night' as some commenters have suggested, is probably a better way to describe the original intention of the event. 

Regardless of an endless stream of comments trying to explain these points to her, the poster refused to relent, choosing to instead argue with anyone who disagreed with her and tell them that they were wrong. 

Why post looking for advice online if you're not willing to accept that advice?

What are your thoughts on this topic? 

Bride Upset Her Brother-In-Law Got Engaged at Her Wedding, Might Actually Be Wrong

This might be the first time that we've seen a story where someone has gotten engaged (or otherwise stolen the thunder of someone else's wedding) where we're going to have to side with the 'thunder stealer.'

The thing that usually creates the issue in these types of situations is that the person is using the gathering to take attention away from those who should be the center of attention and redirecting it towards their own entitled ass.

Here… Well, things are a little bit different. The couple discretely went off on their own to a quiet place at an appropriate moment during proceedings and privately got engaged. They didn't tell anyone. They didn't make any fuss. They didn't steal anyone's thunder. They didn't even post their news on social media until days afterward. So was there really any ethical wrongdoing here?

This thread was posted to Reddit's r/AITA subreddit by the Brother-In-Law, wondering if he was wrong for his discrete engagement to his girlfriend during his brother's wedding. His brother and his brother's bride are furious with him and claim they "ridiculed their wedding with their post." 

Is the couple that got engaged in the wrong here? What's your take?

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27 Dungeons And Dragons Memes To Snatch Like A Rogue

Life is about balance. And since so much of life is about the cold and brutal realities of being trapped in your own flesh prison, it's important to spend some time offsetting that with some fantasy. Specifically a fantasy where you can solve problems by hitting them with a club or smoking them with a lobbed fireball. Why even deal with anything if you can't spend a little bit of time pretending you're a bard, barding your way through an orc brothel.

Be you the frustrated DM who's just trying to get the party to notice your immaculately placed trap door, or you're a boneheaded party member rolling to see if they can scratch their own ass with a cursed dagger without prematurely ending the campaign, there's something for everyone in the realm of Dungeons and Dragons memes to cast on self. Now pop them dice out and shake 'em around a little.

Employee Fired, Told To Forget Everything They Know, Blows Up In Ex-Boss's Face

This employee was done dirty by their company, and told to "forget everything they know" or face legal recourse. And as per their moron ex-boss's instructions, they did just that. It just so happens that when the tower of cards their boss asked them to build finally came tumbling down 10 years later, that very same boss was left with one option: ask OP how to fix the whole thing. It's just too bad the instructions were all long gone, and OP had dutifully forgotten the important details on the matter. Too bad, so sad.

What's amazing is that this old boss was so desperate that they had to come back crawling on their knees to an employee that they could have kept around if they had simply been treated fairly. What a foreign concept, treating your employees like people.

For another good one, here's the power-tripping manager who reminded an employee that she could quit anytime, so she did.

23 Women Share Things Men Have Done That Creeped Them Out Without Realizing It

As a dude in society, it's pretty easy to not be terrifically creepy. As long as you're at least minimally attentive and don't speak in threats, you're already most of the way there.

Sure, it's easy to get signals mixed up when talking to someone and say the wrong thing. But at the same time, there are almost no times when meeting a stranger that it'll ever be appropriate to say something like "if you disappeared right now no one would ever find out." But still, it happens all the time. And since there are total creeps out there, everyone's rightfully on their guard all the time, and it just makes it that much harder for those of us who don't end every social interaction with "I bought you a drink, you owe me a hug." So here are some things dudes did that creeped women out.

For some real "nice guy" wildness, here's the delusional nice guy who went bananas on his engaged coworker.

Funny Signs From All Over This Crazy World

It's easy for life to make us feel like we don't have a voice. There are over 7 billion of us. And just thinking about the throngs of people on this planet makes it hard for you to imagine yourself as a distinct entity. "How could I possibly be unique in this sea of people, all thinking and saying things" we all think and say to ourselves, forever blind to the mass cataclysm of simultaneous irony popping in and out of our many skulls.

As it turns out, sometimes all it takes to have a voice is to just write that thing down and put it in a public place. It sounds stupidly obvious, but when you see it done successfully it makes perfect sense. Even the doomed people of Pompeii wrote dirty jokes on the walls of their own city. Funny signs have been around forever, and will continue to exist, even after we're all buried under thousands of tons of lava.

Here are some more funny signs from all over this weird world.

Lying Husband Blames Employee For Cheap Room, Gets Destroyed By The Truth

Who knows what this guy thought he could get away with by trying to reconstruct a story to the very front desk person he talked to on the phone. This dude decided to go cheap on his hotel, then when the time came to stay there he had the audacity to get in a fight over the room he gleefully booked months before. It's one of those no-win situations where you wonder just how far this person is going to dig themselves in. Especially since the front desk employee he was haranguing had the capacity to bring up the exact conversation they had had about the booking, leaving none of the facts up for conjecture.

It's like trying to get in a fight over the definition of a word while the other person is actively thumbing through a dictionary. Just no thought at all.

For another fun one, here's the furious customer who insisted a guy wasn't the owner before noticing the big poster with his face on it.

Woman Reenacts Exactly what it's like Conversing with that One Coworker with No Boundaries, and it's Painfully Accurate

I am not the long term solution

The Top Tinder Moments of the Week (June 7, 2021)

Welcome to this week's Top Tinder Moments, a collection of the hottest trending Tinder memes, profiles, and conversations that have been viral online over the last week. As always, there's a heavy dose of fresh content but the occasional 'classic' tends to inevitably pop up too (looking at you one-armed girl.) 

This week we have some celebrity appearances in the form of a fake account for Amber Heard that has surfaced in the wake of the resolution of the infamously high-profile trial between her and ex Johnny Depp. 

An alleged tweet from 'Billionaire Bro' Elon Musk that he allegedly made back in April has resurfaced as well. Safe to say he now has bigger things to worry about than how hot his Tinder matches are now that Tesla's stock is in free fall. Bill Gates must be stoked about the short positions that he took on the company's stock which caused a publicized dispute between himself and Musk.

Scroll on for this week's selection below.

 

Sister Gets Kicked Out After Cruel Comments About Lost Pregnancy

There are just some thoughts that should never leave your head. Some of these thoughts can be cruel intrusions, but others can be something that you might want to get sorted out.

A commenter offered a really helpful strategy for gauging whether we should let a thought out of our head that I think all of us should stop and reflect on before we speak. 

"There is the suggestion to THINK before you say something. That is, is what you are going to say True, Helpful, Inspiring, Necessary, & Kind.

True: Possibly - but I side with Fred's perspective.

Helpful: No.

Inspiring: To what end!?

Necessary: No.

Kind: Quite the opposite!"

- Kitchen-Arm-3288

This sister had absolutely no filter or consideration for how her words might affect others when she decided to pass a flippantly-cruel comment to someone who had recently lost a late-term pregnancy.

The thread was posted to Reddit's r/AITA (Am I the A--Hole) subreddit by Redditor u/crispsandfries, the woman who had to kick her sister out of the house when she insulted their relatives. She wants to know if she is in the wrong for kicking her sister out of her home after her callous comment.

Commenters reinforced the poster's decision to excuse her sister from the dinner after her comments, noting that her actions made her most definitely not the a-hole. They thought it would have been far worse for her to do nothing and let the behavior continue. 

"What an unbelievably callous thing to say." -ZookeepergameWise774

Karen Exercises her 'Right' to Scream Nonsense at Poor Starbucks Worker, Proudly Exclaims "It is Not Illegal to Yell Here"

Never heard someone yell with such cadence

Bad Dad Demands Son's Graduation Money Back to Give to His Step-Child

Imagine trading out your own children for the child of your new spouse. That's the kind of cruel reality that is hard to envision, but the reality is that there are those of us out there who have had to experience this very thing. 

This thread was posted to Reddit's r/AITA (Am I the A--Hole) subreddit by Redditor u/Cheap-Tour9949. 

He explains that his father has repeatedly let him down, and as a result, the two have a "rocky" relationship. After his parents split, he remained a good parent until he met his new wife and prioritized her children over his son, repeatedly canceling plans with him in favor of the step-kids or inviting them along to their father-son excursions. 

This carried on through his teens, the same story of repeated disappointment. Now it has passed a breaking point as his father has demanded that he give his college graduation gift back to him so that he can give it to one of his step-children instead. 

u/Cheap-Tour9949 is wondering if he is wrong for handing it back to him in front of the step-children and telling him that he no longer wanted him in his life and not to come to his graduation.

The internet has declared, and we'd tend to agree, that there is nothing here that he has remotely done wrong. However, we hope that he can manage to cut off this relationship with his father and find peace and happiness despite the cruel hand that fate has dealt him.

Neighborhood Kid's Bake Sale Sparks Drama When Neighbor Demands Half the Earnings Despite Fronting Nothing

Conflict emerged when this neighbor's kid demanded that he receive "half the money" from a bake sale when he decided he was bored and wanted to go home early. He wasn't even willing to stay the full duration and put in the work in order to earn his part of the cash. The other kid responded that this wasn't fair and that they should split the money earned for the duration that the neighbor's kid had worked. 

This prompted the neighbor to march over to this family's house, complaining that it wasn't fair for their kid to profit off of things that she had purchased for the sale. The neighbor was waving a receipt around of the things she had supposedly purchased for the bake sale, half of which hadn't even been used.

This thread was posted to Reddit's r/MaliciousCompliance subreddit by the mother, u/snortgiggles, who organized the bake sale for her children to share with the neighbor's kids. 

u/snortgiggles decided that she would play the neighbor's game and went to get her receipts too, knowing that her total was going to be far greater than the neighbor's as she had fronted almost everything for the bake sale. 

Scroll on for screenshots of the story and the reactions below.

25 Dumb Design Failures That Need To Think About What They've Done

Let's face it; we're stupid people who constantly make mistakes. It's just a matter of what you're in charge of that judges the full impact of your constant bungling. When it's something like "the world economy" don't worry about messing that up, cause you're probably high up enough to keep your job and end up with a nice bonus. It's too bad that when someone up top makes a crap decision, it only results in the destabilization of tons of people's lives, and it doesn't end up as a funny sign or inappropriate logo. Then people might want to get them fired.

Anyway, here are some design failures that could have used some effort.

And for the love of god, who keeps trying to carpet all of these bathrooms? Is not having cold feet while brushing your teeth in the morning really worth having your entire bathroom smell like wet dog?

21 Satisfying Times People Witnessed Someone's Ego Get Crushed

People love talking about how great they are. The thing is, talking about how awesome you are at something and actually being good at it aren't necessarily linked. Every lie incurs a debt to the truth, and when that truth comes out in startling, public fashion it just makes it that much nicer to witness. Not only do we owe it to other people to actually be basically honest about things, but people can tell when you're being cocky. And every time a guy walks around like he's Liberace talking about how he could smoke anyone at bowling, it's almost like the universe conspires to conjure up that guy's worst nightmare. There's always a bigger fish, so don't abuse people on your way up, because you'll need them on your way down. How many more platitudes can fit in this paragraph? None. Absolutely none. This is the best paragraph that ever has been and ever will be.

25 Trashtacular Moments That Reek Of Garbage-osity

Life can be challenging, and that's even when there aren't other people really messing the place up. On the higher levels of the spectrum of basic indecency, there are entitled people and their bold moves. And they're mostly concerned with borrowing your lawnmower and never giving it back. But then there's the trashy side of things. And this side is more concerned with borrowing your lawnmower, spray-painting a crude yet erotic version of Lois from Family Guy on the side, and then selling it for Sudafed. So, ya know, there's kind of a lot going on.

In a perfect world, people wouldn't go around stealing their neighbor's doormats and illegally parking sideways across two handicap spots. But we don't live in a perfect world, and this kind of thing isn't going away any soon. Your choices are to ignore it, tolerate it, learn to enjoy it, or the spiciest option, become it.

Lazy Coworkers Try to Scapegoat the One Pulling the Weight, So She Throws Them Under the Bus

What is it with people constantly trying to blame someone else for the thing that they themselves are most guilty of? This hypocritical finger-pointing is just a vapid means of projection that these narcissistic robots employ whenever they feel threatened. 

This thread was posted to Reddit's r/AITA (Am I the A--Hole) subreddit by the coworker scapegoated by the others, Redditor u/Maleficent_Shoe3791. She had been doing all of the work to make up for their lazy behavior, and they still tried to blame her as if she was the lazy one. 

Commenters cheered her decision to turn the other coworkers in and expose them for the lazy hypocrites that they were. 

"NTA, they were trying to blame you, I would and have done the exact thing," stated Aythatsmessedup.

While Express-Gift-9750 replied, "NTA. Ik everyone hates snitches but i draw the line when others wrongfully snitch on me. I wouldnt complain about my coworkers being lazy but if they had the audacity to lie about me i would absolutely snitch, that's unacceptable."

Keep scrolling to see selected screenshots of the original thread and the internet's reactions below. 

Woman Deploys Cake Subterfuge To Prove Her In-Laws Are All Liars

It's a strange feeling, watching a group of people slowly and deliberately make you an pariah. And the means of this kind of social warfare can be totally arbitrary. The type of car you have or the brand of phone you buy can all be used against you if you're around the type of miserable people who are willing to judge you on it.

Something as petty as a cake can be turned into a symbol of solidarity in order to alienate and delegitimize a person's standing in a group. Or at least it feels that way when you're consistently asked to bring a dessert that everyone deliberately ignores. To put it more succinctly, "this isn't baking, this is war."

That's why OP decided to copy some cake pops and prove to her in-laws that they're a bunch of lying bastards.

For a delightful tale of revenge, here's the neighbor who lied about mulberry wine to get their eavesdropping neighbor to chop down their own tree.