Thursday, December 10, 2020

Man's Fiancée's Parents Accuse Him Of Buying Cheap Ring


There's a lot of ungrateful and toxic behavior on display in this lover's quarrel. The poor guy claims he's been supporting his family, while hard at work through this historically difficult time, and then when he buys his love a nice ($3K) engagement ring he gets chewed out by her family for not spending enough. Insane. Now above any other time it's incomprehensible that someone would go and pitch a fit about something like that, when so many folks are just struggling to hold onto some sliver of financial security. 

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Text - 1 3 4 AITA for not buying a 10% engagement ring? Not the A-hole My partner and I have been talking about getting engaged for the last year or so. I have quite a good job so could easily afford an expensive engagement ring and if I was following the 10% rule then I should spend around 10-15k on the ring. However, my parents, sister and nephew have all had covid this year so I was financially supporting all of them for a while, my sister has lost her job so l'm still supporting her a bit an

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Text - So long story short I spent about 3k on a nice little white gold ring with diamonds and a sapphire(her birthstone). Initially she was very happy with it until her mother(a jeweller) called it cheap. She has since given it back to me and accused me of undervaluing her and what she does for me(she's a SAHM to our 18 month old, and does the majority of the cooking/cleaning because i work long hours). I feel like shit tbh, she's refusing to talk to my, her parents are accusing me of using her

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Text - Edited to add that why her mum is a jeweller by trade/ training, she no longer works in the industry due to an issue with her wrists, carpel tunnel or something, I'm not 100% sure. So she wasn't in a position to help with the ring. EDIT: I've answered this several times in the comments so might as well put it here too: their concerns aren't based on any form of concern about financial insecurity as I pay her to be a SAHM. She gets $450/week to spend however she likes or save, I happen to

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Text - I did discuss ring styles with my partner before buying the ring. She wanted a sapphire surrounded by diamonds like princess Diana's ring. I also noticed that she preferred pear cut stones so I had a sapphire custom cut into a pear shape and placed into a diamond halo on a white gold band. There is little to no chance that I was over charged because it was done in conjunction with 2 jewelers and I had it independently appraised for insurance reasons afterwards. 4 7.2k 3 2.4k ↑, Share

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Text - andyblu • 19h NTA: The 10% rule was created by the JEWELRY INDUSTRY. The two of you need to decide what is appropriate for you and your situation. If you are guilty about it or she feels slighted, then the two of you should agree to re-evaluate your circumstances at your 5th anniversary and upgrade her ring then. Reply 5.3k ...

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Text - someawfulbitch • 19h Whoa. Wtf? People really expect that shit?? NTA. Nah. 3k is a NICE ring. That's some.... Nah, I don't wanna trash talk someone I never met, but nah. NTA at all. She was happy til she knew the value. Enough said. Reply 1.6k •..

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Text - HemlockAndStone • 18h 1 Award NTA Her parents are out of line for sure, but you need to be talking to your partner, not them. From her perspective, she's got her parents in her ear telling her that a "cheap" ring is indicative of your feelings towards her, and as a SAHM, she's pretty dependent on you for money (which I would imagine is a scary position to be in). You should make it clear that you are thinking about the future and making sure that you both are financially secure, at a time

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Text - danimal-crossing • 19h • Partassipant [3] 3 1 Award NTA. this some rich people shit. she's entitled and should appreciate what she got, 3k is a lot. E Q Reply 4 1.0k ...

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Text - emrose138 • 19h 1 Award NTA and run. If her parents can sway her opinion that much, that's a huge red flag. And if she also believes that she's being de-valued because she was given a 3k ring, then she clearly has issues. I'm sorry, no matter what your income is, it's a pandemic, and you've clearly been financially affected by it. Her refusing to acknowledge that is ridiculous. O Reply 1 2.9k 3 + •..

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Text - wildwest74 • 19h • Partassipant [2] NTA. If she gave the ring back because she or her mother think $3K is cheap, that tells you everything you need to know. I say this as someone who spent over $12K on an engagement/custom wedding set. I could afford it. If I couldn't, my wife would have been more upset that I spent that much. And she would have been equally thrilled with any smaller ring l could have given her. She is marrying you, not the jewelry, and not your paycheck. If this is to be

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Text - PayrollPrince • 19h • Pooperintendant [52] NTA We're in a global crisis.. you're literally supporting your entire family and your partner is also aware of this. She should be a little more understanding... this is giving me red flags. Money isn't everything and it's clear that you care about her. Her mother needs to mind her own business Reply 295 ...

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Text - IGotOverGreta • 18h • Partassipant [3] NTA. The 10% "rule" was invented by diamond sellers and jewelers. Have a conversation with your fiancee and ask her how she feels about the ring, and how she felt about it before someone gave her an outside judgement. Tell her why your budget was smaller than she expected. Helping your family keep a roof over their heads and food in the stomachs during a global pandemic is not a heartless thing. If she's still upset about it, try to find a compromise

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Text - MsBaseball34 • 19h • Certified Proctologist [23] NTA ... a divorce would have been way more expensive. Don't marry someone who obviously only values monetary things. Reply 1 172 ...

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Text - anonoldman2020 • 19h NTA. It is a scam fostered by jewelers. Tell her you will try to find someone else who will accept it. EDIT - That is probably a little harsh. Tell her you will hold it for her until she feels like she wants to be engaged more than she wants a more expensive ring. Q Reply 1 116 ...

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Text - DreadGrrl • 18h • Certified Proctologist [24] NTA The "10% Rule" is marketing BS spouted by the industry. Don't feel bad about not falling for their crap. Reply 12 ...

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Text - Wallflowerheart • 19h • Pooperintendant [54] NTA A TEN THOUSAND DOLLAR RING IS RIDICULOUS. If she doesn't accept your ring that you thoughtfully picked out, then she doesn't accept you. E Q Reply 115 3 ...

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Text - electric29 • 19h NTA. This makes me so sad for you. She doesn't appreciate that you thoughtfully picked one you knew she would like. She then got her mind changed (VERY easily) by people who are not in your relationship, so she cares more what they think than about you and your life together. She doesn't appreciate that you have other responsibilities and are meeting those. If she was a decent person, she would have told her mom to butt out and even if she didn't absolutely love the ring,

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Text - tallulahmoon • 11h NTA 1. She's marrying you because she loves you (supposedly) not for a ring. 2. The 10% rule is sexist and ridiculous on both sides. 3. Her parents aren't marrying you, frankly l'd tell them to stop getting involved. You can always upgrade in the future if you want to, but also l'd seriously reconsider marrying someone that materialistic. I know if the man I loved said he wanted to marry me l'd just be delighted and excited regardless. Reply 1 7 ...

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