Wednesday, February 10, 2021

Programmer Humor For The World's Tech Wizards


We're well aware at this point that the folks in this world who work in tech support or just the IT department in general really do hold the keys to the kingdom in some sense. With that being said, tech support deals with all kinds of mind blowing acts of cluelessness from paid professionals that seemingly fell through the cracks on some of the most basic technological knowledge. It could be a scenario where you find yourself being the IT guy who is dealing with a professor that doesn't understand how internet browsers work. That kind of daunting realization requires nothing short of a saintly patience to be able to move forward in the troubleshooting process without losing grip on your sanity altogether.

Or, maybe you're another one of those lucky IT guys who has to calmly walk a company's CEO through how to reboot a computer. Yes, these people really exist. You never know what you might encounter while you muddle through your job in the tech support world. The stories we're able to enjoy from an established subreddit like "Tales From Tech Support" though are eye-opening tales about just how lost some of the world's poor souls are, for when it comes to navigating the use of their computer or other pieces of technological equipment.

Maybe some of the most grim stories from the tech support world will manage to make you feel better about your moments of profound confusion when trying to use your work device. Some people's brains just operate at a frequency where they're completely not tuned into how to use a fancy computer. Perhaps, this is the inevitable collective manifestation of technology continuing to evolve at such a rate that the older generations especially, are pretty much helpless in their pursuit toward getting the most out of their fancy computers, tablets, phones etc. Seems like a reasonable enough assumption to draw. You very well might have fond memories of trying to explain to a parent how they can turn off their iPhone, or change the input on a TV.

But alas, we're straying off the topic of programmers explicitly. Programmers are definitely the backbone of many esteemed companies. They're out there in the pits of the coding world, providing the infrastructure necessary for a company to keep up with these fast moving technological times. With that being considered, it should come as no surprise that programmers are regularly pushed to their breaking point in terms of the kinds of unbelievably clueless questions they field on a daily basis. And these same programmers are furiously working away at all kinds of projects that many of us couldn't hope to understand the first thing about. Maybe we're just gradually sliding into a reality where everyone's going to need to know how to code at some level. The skill itself seems to continue to skyrocket in value, and more and more it's as if people that are able to code have some kind of golden ticket for when it comes to locking down the next promising job opportunity. All in all, these gems from the world's fed up programmers should certainly get the laughs going for anyone who has ever dabbled in the dark art of coding.

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Organism - Zhuowei Zhang @zhuowei Never spend 6 minutes doing something by hand when you can spend 6 hours failing to automate it

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Font - Omonbude Emmanuel @BUDESCODE To replace programmers with Robots, clients will have to accurately describe what they want. We're safe. 7:25 PM · 20 Jul 20 · Twitter for Android

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Font - ankit @WtFawwk *starts typing a new line of code* IDE: what is that? what are you writing? tell me right now! wtf? that's not right! is that even rea.. *completes the line* IDE: oh lol nvm. 9:26 PM · 08 Jun 20 · Twitter for Android

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Line - Jens Ravens @JensRavens Replying to @tiangolo Last year I got rejected during a job interview for "not understanding" the concepts of a certain ioS library. What the interviewer didn't know: I wrote that thing. I actually had a lot of fun during that interview >

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Rectangle - L(9S @SeanTAllen · 12h If you clone a person, are they the same person? 000 Yes No 84 votes · 11 hours left 27 1 Liam Hammett @LiamHammett · 11h Depends if you clone by reference or by value 00 27 1 14

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Product - Eddy Vinck @EddyVinckk JavaScript Web developers in 2020: If we split our JavaScript into separate files and load them on demand we can make the initial request to the homepage 30Kb smaller Game developers in 2020: Here's a 110Gb download including files we're not even using anymore

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Organism - christina zhu @cszhu if you're not happy single, you won't be happy in a relationship. true happiness comes from closing 100 chrome tabs after solving an obscure programming bug, not from someone else

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Organism - ird Allah Dawood Ali AO INPAES VEI IN KU @yugdiputsa The best apps I have developed: 1. Hello World 2. Test App 3. Untitled Project

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Font - Chirasul @chirasul since we're having a baby in a couple months, the discord is discussing parenting life hacks Chirasul Today at 2:31 PM give your baby a dollar immediately after birth before they receive their social security number. when they receive their SS, they're value is reset automatically to 0. now take back that dollar. baby now has a negative value; the social security buffer cant handle a negative number so it immediately flips around to the highest 32-bit integer, letting y

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Font - Thread Computer programming Kat Maddox @ctrlshifti me: why isn't this working? normal languages: you screwed up over here me: oh thanks me: why isn't this working? javascript: O me: please i'm begging you javascript: O 9:40 AM · Aug 18, 2020 · Twitter Web App 350 Retweets and comments 2.1K Likes

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Organism - Francesco Napoletano @napolux Give a man a program, frustrate him for a day. Teach a man to program, frustrate him for a lifetime. 12:30 PM · 11 May 20 · Buffer 492 Retweets 1,759 Likes

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World - Randall Koutnik Follow @rkoutnik Why programmers like cooking: You peel the carrot, you chop the carrot, you put the carrot in the stew. You don't suddenly find out that your peeler is several versions behind and they dropped support for carrots in 4.3 9:22 PM - 16 Jan 2019 1,845 Retweets 5,689 Likes 68 t7 1.8K 5.7K

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Product - @bejewelledbud Can you guys please recommend books that made you cry? Frease O char.mander. @FreaseDaddy Data Structures and Algorithms in Java (2nd Edition) 2nd Edition by Robert Lafore (Author) ***** 114 customer reviews Look inside Kindle Doo Hardcover Paperback Other Se $29.80 $33.89 - $45.04 $23.39 - $27.18 See all 6 versi Buy used Buy new DATA STDUCTURES In Stock

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Font - Which language is best, C, C++, Python or Java? Andrea Ferro, Knows a few programming languages. Learning a fe. Answered January 7, 2015 If you are writing an operating system, I suggest you use C. If you are writing a very complex application where execution speed is extremely important, I suggest you use C++. If time to market is key, but execution speed is not important, I suggest you use python. If your boss told you: "do it in Java or you are fired" I suggest you use Java and look fo

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Font - I Am Devloper @iamdevloper Every now and then, ping one of your competitor's websites using an IE6 VM. Keep them on their toes. 11:57 AM · Jul 24, 2018 · Twitter Web Client 3.3K Retweets 10.2K Likes

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Font - Phil Lynch @PhilipLynchGW ... my code better start doing what i want it to do instead of what i'm telling it to do 6:21 AM · 11/27/20 · Twitter Web App

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Product - Paul Graham replied Tawanda Nyahuye @towernter What is the biggest lie you have heard from a programmer? 6:42 PM - Jul 10, 2020 · Twitter for Android 362 Retweets and comments 1.4K Likes @paulg · 7h Replying to @towernter "It should work now." Paul Graham 27 27 54 1.1K

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