Friday, January 22, 2021

Funniest 911 Calls Operators Have Received


911 operators regularly end up dealing with a whole lot of unnecessary hysterics from folks that are really taking the, "better safe than sorry" sentiment to heart. Someone on AskReddit got a thread rolling about some of the most unforgettably hilarious calls that 911 operators have ever ended up receiving. 

1.

Font - Canoe52 · 3d 8 1 Award My kid worked for animal control, we are eating dinner and 911 dispatch calls him. Some panicked lady had called 911 about an owl in a tree that couldn't fly. It had been sitting in the tree for a half hour not moving. Of course it was just before dusk and the owl was just waiting for dark so it could go hunt for dinner. Then there was the call about the one legged duck at the park... Edit to add: he actually went to the park to make sure the duck wasn't injured but

2.

Font - barrel-getya · 3d My late aunt once called 911 because my uncle wouldn't change the fan that was blowing on her. Because it was a small community in NE Michigan, the police laughed and came out and changed the fan. Reply 4 1.5k ...

3.

Font - giga_impact03• 3d 3 8 9 Awards My department dispatches our area's animal control after hours. Once received a call from a guy freaking out because he caught a possum in his house. I asked him which room he was able to confine the animal and he didn't tell me which room, but said he trapped it in a microwave. I had many questions.

4.

Font - domods · 3d Not 911 but worked for animal control dispatch in a tourist town during my senior year in HS. Got a call from a lady that had called 911 previously and was told to call our number. Picked up the phone to what sounded like a whole car of very panicked people all yelling at once. After asking what was wrong several times I finally heard someone yell "a deer! There's a deer in somebody's yard, yall gotta come pick it up!" Thinking it was a dead deer/road kill I said an animal con

5.

Font - SooperDiz · 3d 3 2 Awards My mom was a 911 operator in the SF Bay area in the 80s and 90s. I asked her to tell me a story to pass along, so here it is: I got a 911 call and I couldn't understand the caller. He was slurring his words. I knew he was calling from a bar so l asked if he'd been drinking and after asking many times I asking, I was able to determine that he wanted the police, not an ambulance. He wanted to file assault charges because a woman pulled his tongue. I asked, "how was

6.

Font - SharenDodge · 4d 3 3 Awards I'm not sure if this is true, but I read about an old lady who called 911 because a ghost was in her house. She was a sweet woman who apparently made calls often, so the officers showed up and pretended to arrest the ghost so she would feel better. Reply 1 3.1k

7.

Font - ArmyOfDog · 3d 2 Awards I was the caller. My deck had a couple unsafe spots. Normally I avoided them just fine, but on this night, it had snowed. I stepped outside for just a minute, because snow is very rare here. In doing so, I forgot about the unsafe spots. I stepped on one, and my leg dropped through. As I fell, the boards on either side of my leg bent, but then retracted. The hole was smaller than my knee now. I couldn't get out. My girlfriend got me a coat to sit on, because my butt

8.

Font - But four super strong firemen couldn't pull me out either, and I will add to that, that I think the first half of this sentence would be fairly humorous out of context. Anyway, one of them went to get a chainsaw out of the fire truck, and while we waited, I started singing "The Pit" from Parks and Rec, and they all joined in with me, and we had a good laugh about my situation. Other than having a sore, purple leg for a few days, I was fine. I bought them all coffee a few days later. Super

9.

Rectangle - que_he_hecho•3d 1 Award Woman called to report seeing a shark in the ocean. Yes, ma'am. That is where we keep them. Reply 448

10.

Font - Mrliams · 3d We occasionally have people call in, concerned that their local convenience store is locked and they can get in ("well ma'am that just means the clerk is using the restroom." "They've been gone over five minutes!" "Some things take longer than others.") We've had people wanting police because those a-hole McDonald's employees refused to sell them a whopper. My favorite though was the woman who was spelling out a name for us, using her own special brand of phonetics... D like

11.

Font - theburningstars • 3d I had one, not too many months ago, from a Spanish speaking man. I answered, he immediately began speaking in Spanish. No big deal, I say "No habla, uno momento por favor, translator line." and get the language line on the phone and ask questions that they translate and give me his responses for. Nothing big, he just heard some shouting and odd noises. Suddenly the language line drops, and I'm still on the phone with the guy. In broken high school Spanish, I tell him

12.

Font - snobro110 · 3d I'm not an operator, this is just a story from my dad. He was pressing random buttons in his car a few months ago, trying to figure out some stuff. He ended up pressing a 911 button, and when they answered my dad was insanely confused. Once they had a few laughs, the operator told him to hang up. Thing is though, he doesn't know how to. It was pretty funny. Reply 1 134 ...

13.

Organism - zipitbitchurdeadtome · 3d I was a relay operator for the deaf, hard of hearing, and speech disabled. Was instructed to call 9-1-1 because a guy left his cardigan at the doctor's office. (Fair play to him; the doctor's answering machine outgoing message, which I faithfully relayed to him, did indeed say "if this is an emegency, dial 9-1-1.) Reply 328

14.

Font - Sort_of_awesome · 3d I dispatched for a rural fire dept. some lady called the non-emergency number to complain that there was a dog stuck under her porch. I told her she needed to call animal control, here's the number. "You don't understand! The DOG is UNDER my PORCH!" "Ma'am, is the dog on fire?" "No..." "Then call ANIMAL control." Reply 16 ...

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