Sunday, July 26, 2020

Disapproving Father-In-Law Gets Humbled In High-Stakes Tetris


Tetris, the building block of every dysfunctional family. Seriously though, this tale of revenge centers on a man and his nasty father-in-law who simply wouldn't accept him for his daughter. By all measures, it sounds like the dad's daughter and the guy telling this story were truly in love, and happy together; but sometimes that just isn't enough for the stubborn, judgmental folks of the world. Fortunately, a moment arrived when Tetris was introduced as the tool to put a stop to all the animosity once and for all. I mean, there was definitely still animosity after the game, but it was of a passive aggressive nature. 

1.

Text - r/ProRevenge u/leader556 • 3h + Join 2 1 1 3 2 How a game of Tetris ended years of bullying from my father-in-law. "I wish you were a challenge." That sentence has echoed in my father-in-law's house for months now, and even saying the word "Tetris" around him causes him to turn into a ball of rage. The theme song to the game makes his eyes bulge, and any oddly colored boxes stacked in a random order seems to give him a PTSD-like gaze that would give a 'nam vet a run for their money.

2.

Text - Okay, I may be exaggerating a little bit, but the funny (and sad) thing is, not by much... At all. | Around a decade ago, I met my now wife "Kayla" in high school. We ran in different circles, with her more academically inclined and me... Not so much. Not that I was a slacker by any means, I just didn't see the point in doing four different after school clubs and college prep classes like her. Even though she was a fuckin' nerd, she was (and still is) a cute fuckin' nerd. We didn't talk m

3.

Text - An important thing to note is Kayla is from a very, very traditional asian family. So much so, that when Kayla had THE AUDACITY to date a hispanic guy instead of shacking up with the eighth grade boy her father had selected for her, she nearly got kicked out of her house. Over time, Kayla's parents slowly realized that I wasn't dragging her down. She was still excelling academically, never came home late, and generally managed to stay the golden child in the house. When we graduated high

4.

Text - Fast forward a few years. Kayla is finishing her bachelors in a science field in the bay area. I'm in a different area of said bay working as a firefighter. It's longish distance, but we meet up every weekend, and sometimes a day or two during the week. Somehow we survive the college crunch of relationships and actually come out stronger for it. We were in love, we made it work, and her father hated it. Her father (who I suppose l'll call Jasper, because fuck that name) still hated me. Fo

5.

Text - Repeat basically the same events over and over for a few more years, and that sums up our relationship. I was the despised demon of a man keeping his angel of a daughter away from marrying her asian prince charming from an acceptable family, so his daughter could breed forty children and become both a perfect housewife AND a lawyer-doctor specializing in engineering... While running a fortune 500 company... Point is, the guy had expectations. Lofty ones. Impossible ones. But still.. Expec

6.

Text - So naturally I did the worst possible thing in his mind and proposed to Kayla. She did the even more worst possible thing and accepted (seriously, I still don't know why) and we were set. The Facebook posts flew, the Instagram pictures set, and appropriate texts and phone calls made. Naturally I completely pussied out of being there when she told her parents, but in my defense, I was busy. Busy being a massive wiener hiding in a fire truck on a volunteer day of work. Still, busy nonethele

7.

Text - From what I gathered it went about as well as anyone could expect. I like to make jokes that he pulled a mushu from Mulan and started saying "dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow.." but Kayla doesn't like it when I make that joke. But I still make that joke. But it's not entirely a joke. He really did say l'd dishonor his family, bring shame, how could he save face, etc. Some months later, Kayla and I both miraculously have a week or so off at the same time. Kayla has a MAGNIFICENT idea.

8.

Text - Kayla and I arrive and in typical fashion, we all start drinking and eating. Most of the family is happy for us, besides a couple holdouts, and the night goes well. Kayla's nephews are in the living room playing on a Nintendo Switch. I'm a huge video game nerd (Kayla is still the bigger fuckin' nerd though guys) and decide to go see what's poppin' in there. To my utter surprise, they're taking turns playing Tetris 99. To an even bigger surprise, Kayla's father was playing. Here's the rub.

9.

Text - During the years of knowing the miserable bastard that is to be my soon daddy-in-law, I didn't even know he touched video games. But here he was, playing Tetris. And he was doing a great job at it. I was impressed. I walked up and complimented him on his game, noting his repeated T-Spins. The family migrated towards the living room, since they tended to act as a buffer between us. Without even taking his eyes off the screen, he turns towards me, and says "you don't know what you're talkin

10.

Text - The gauntlet was dropped or however that saying goes. We were essentially going fox only, final destination on this bitch. Kayla's nephew sheepishly handed me a controller while Jasper stuck with the joycons. He started setting up a game while muttering under his breath about it being a waste of time and him rather doing a million other things. "I'm sick of this bullshit Mr. LastName. I'm tired of you basically bullying me and talking shit about me to my face. I'm marrying Kayla next year

11.

Text - "You know what? Fuck you. If you beat me at this game, I'll literally leave right now. Whether or not Kayla comes with will be her decision, but if you beat me, I swear to you and EVERYONE HERE that l'll never step foot in this house. Ever again. You'll never have to see me again. But if you lose, this shit ends here. No more bad- mouthing me, no more petty bullshit, no more of your snide comments. You don't say a single fucking negative thing about me or my family EVER again." By the tim

12.

Text - "I SWEAR IT! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU IN MY FUCKING HOUSE AGAIN! YOU SHIT FUCK! FUCK SHIT! BITCH FUCK!" After a few more moments of his rage, we sat down awkwardly on the same two seater couch and he finished setting up the game. And so we began. There is no epic struggle of good versus evil. No monumental herculean task of defeating my foe or vanquishing an enemy. I was no Theseus, and he was no minotaur. Just Tetris. Blocks and more blocks. In a room extremely silent with nothing but the

13.

Text - Bot by bot, block by block, it slowly whittled down while blocks quickly fell down. KO's and flashing lights filled the room as the numbers slowly dwindled down. 12, 11, 10... The music switches. The blocks fall even faster. Jasper and I calmly stack blocks. 4, 3, 2. It was just us. l'd like to lie to you and say we played Tetris for hours, in a slug fest like I was Rocky and he Ivan Drago, but it didn't turn out like that. It was anti- climactic. He fucked up and rapdily got stacked out,

14.

Text - That's a fucking lie. I stood up and looked around while the family remained silent and unsure of what the fuck just happened. Jasper seethed. I looked at him for a few long seconds until we made eye contact. "I wish you were a challenge." Needless to say I fucking ruined that party. Kayla wasn't happy at all, I was slightly drunk still, and Jasper had straight up walked to his room and slammed the door. But to his goddamn credit, l'd never heard a negative word out of his mouth again, to

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