Wednesday, June 24, 2020

Stupidest Things People Did to Prove They Could


People are absolutely terrific at doing stupid things. Whether it's eating 17 donuts, climbing through a bunch of poison ivy, or eating the hottest chicken sandwich ever, you can bet that people will do real dumb junk just to prove it to themselves. Here are more people's dumbest high risk, low reward moments.

1.

Text - UniversalPolymath 27.0k points · 12 hours ago F2 & 5 More My partner was a heavy smoker, and at the time, I'd never touched a cigarette. I would subtly-and sometimes not-so-subtly, but always lovingly-urge her to quit. She told me I had no idea how hard it was. I decided to take up smoking for about a month and then quit just to show her I could do it. That was ten years ago. I'm on a pack a day. She no longer smokes.

2.

Text - Skarface08 26.7k points · 14 hours ago 12 Cliff diving, saw a old man do a front flip off a 40 foot cliff. I said if he can do it, so can I. I did the flip alright, followed by a belly flop that Zeus could hear. Knocked the air out of me, but luckily people were floating near by to save my dumb ass.

3.

Text - Queen-of-Beans 17.3k points · 13 hours ago In 2001, my sister got me a Sony phone, a tiny little thing with a flip down front. She worked in a phone shop and got discount. On the box, it said the phone was waterproof and there were tiny rubber seals in places. I believed them. At the pub where I worked, this aspect came up in conversation. Some guy said the phone couldn't be waterproof, and that shower proof was probably more accurate. Remembering the box, I argued the point... And droppe

4.

Text - Hellboy32607 15.3k points · 13 hours ago Walked through the brush of our treeline to get a football to prove it wasn't poison ivy. I did it. I got the football. It was poison ivy.

5.

Text - MasterOfOne 14.4k points · 12 hours ago · edited 2 hours ago I used to work at a shitty movie theatre. As it gets to midnight all the employees hang out behind the concessions counter and shoot the shit, eat the popcorn before we have to throw it out, etc. One of them dared someone to do a butter shot. But like, the liquid butter for popcorn is way closer to straight oil. So an oil shot. I'm always a slut for attention so I said pass it to me and I downed it without letting myself think a

6.

Text - _citizenzero 13.0k points · 12 hours ago Won a doughnut eating contest. In 10 minutes I ate about 17 doughnuts, and seconds before the time was up and I had all my thoughts set on having a hearty cleansing puke a motherfucker who wasn't even taking part yelled that throwing up afterwards should disqualify you. Somebody counted that I took in a few days worth of calories. My appetite came back two days after.

7.

Text - mixedwithmonet 35.1k points · 12 hours ago A buddy bet I couldn't finish the spiciest chicken sandwich at this joint known for insanely spicy chicken in under 30 minutes. I knew I fucked up when they gave me gloves to eat the sandwich so the sauce couldn't touch my skin and made me sign a waiver. Won the bet, but really I lost in the end.

8.

Text - thefuzzybunny1 451 points · 14 hours ago In college the choir I worked for sent out an invitation for a "sweats only" party. This was clearly intended to mean "comfy/casual dress", but a rumor got started that it meant you were only supposed to wear sweatpants, no shirt. The leader of the club issued a clarification, but since we were all college students, she also found it funny to say "you absolutely can wear shirts to the party... But you don't have to!" I joked to another friend that,

9.

Text - Hailene2092 10.8k points · 14 hours ago · edited 10 hours ago Parents put a curfew on the computer when I was -12 during summer break. No gaming from 10pm-бат. A reasonable person would go to bed at 10-10:30 and wake up at 7 to play, right? 12 year old me just steed stayed up until 6am, woke up my parents, and played until noon. Then died until dinner. Rinse and repeat for a few days until my parents got sick of waking up at 6am. Then I went back to gaming until like 2am.

10.

Text - steffinator117 9.1k points · 11 hours ago I was about 4 years old and my grandfather was making something with buttermilk. I saw it in his hand, and I cried and screamed and begged to have some. He kept saying "No, you won't like it!", but I persisted. He finally poured me an entire glass. I took one swig and I'm sure he could see the disgust on my face, because he looked like he had won. I stared at him right in his eyeballs as I chugged the entire glass.

11.

Text - brother_meowzone 7.9k points · 11 hours ago 3 In grade school, maybe age 11 or 12, I had these cheap jeans. I figured out that I could flex my belly and pop the button open, found this funny and guy friends in class got a laugh too. One of them turns to a girl, hey girl checkout what OP can do; I flex my belly and let out a huge fart while the button popped open. She turned away, my buddy laughed, and i never did this trick again

12.

Text - movealongnowpeople 7.9k points · 15 hours ago I stabbed my leg with a pencil in elementary school. I told people I couldn't really feel much pain (which, at the time, was true). There was a spot on my leg from the lead for years.

13.

Text - DemiDork231 7.5k points · 10 hours ago I told my 6th grade friends I could just off a two story roof and not get hurt. Guess who only got a scraped knee that day? Not me. I broke my leg

14.

Text - quietfirefox 5.2k points · 14 hours ago Ate the largest box of goldfish in one night in college. Don't do this.

15.

Text - Seqouyagjones0405 3.4k points · 15 hours ago Snuck into The Hilton and confiscated a white robe, got caught and they let me go without checking my backpack. That's alcohol for you.

16.

Text - Iskilado 3.0k points · 13 hours ago I was learning MMA for 3 months when some guy challenged me to a fight I immediately accepted it because I wanted to impress my crush by beating him. Turns out he was a national champion and was in the state for a MMA tournament. I got my ass kicked for solid 3 rounds

17.

Text - crazycajun660 2.8k points · 13 hours ago Did 5 pull up's on an antenna strut 400 feet up on an antenna tower not tied off.

18.

Text - hellbentforleisure 2.4k points · 12 hours ago 3 As a kid I told my friends I could hold my breath for a long time, long enough to pass out, in fact. And that's exactly what I proceeded to do.

19.

Text - littleredhoodlum 623 points · 11 hours ago I can do a standing back flip. The best time to prove this isn't when your 7 drinks deep wearing a short bridesmaids dress and underwear made for speed not comfort. Yep brides grandma got to see my ass but I landed it perfectly.

20.

Text - outdoorcobbler 494 points · 11 hours ago Not me, but my dad's friend. They were all sitting around being dumb drunk rednecks. And one of them was like, "I betcha I can get this entire beer can down in one of them there coke bottles." Then proceeded to do it by shredding the can by hand, cutting his fingers to shit in the process. But damn it, he got it all in there, piece by stupid piece.

21.

Text - adipocerousloaf 304 points · 11 hours ago The splits. I weigh 263 fucking pounds.

22.

Text - gentlesir123 1.2k points · 16 hours ago Crushing beers on my forehead. Still stupid. I'll still do it.

23.

Text - Sleepdprived 1.3k points · 14 hours ago Remained standing through as much taser as possible. My friend used up the battery on himself and said he was trying to "get used" to it... he said that eventually he would be able to remain standing... i said what the hell and tried... its not easy fighting electro convulsive action. We tasted ourselves and each other a bunch of times... i don't think we got better at resisting it. ( I say taser bit I really mean stun gun no prongs)

24.

Text - oktetus 1.3k points · 14 hours ago There comes a point in every (drunk) man's life where he finds himself standing on the edge of a precipice (apartment building roof) staring into the distance at glory (a fucking tree) separated from him by a challenge (a three story fall). The weak man will shrug his shoulders. slink back to safety, and carry on with his night as if he never glimpsed what could have been. But the bold (stupid) man will look across the chasm and see the greatness that aw

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Tumblr User Explains Their Annual "Moving of the Jesus"


It's a passive aggressive holiday ritual. Some families have elf on the shelf and others have "please take that horrible excuse for a Jesus away." For some more religious-themed tumblr shenanigans, here's a Tumblr thread on holy water loopholes and for more unique family dynamics here are people's weirdest family tics.

1.

Text - grumpsaesthetics every year around christmas me and my grandma play this fun family game called “maybe you want to put jesus in your room instead, sweetie? :)". now, it's important to note that the jesus referred to in our game is not actually the real jesus christ, but instead a wooden figure i made in 2011 that has an uncanny resemblance to the lord and savior himself so what happens is that i place jesus in our living room, and my grandma smiles and asks me if i don't want to decorate

2.

Text - now, the real jesus christ might have been able to perform a miracle like this, but please remember that the jesus in our story is only a figure made out of wood. he can not move on his own, so i think we can safely say that my grandma is the prime suspect here the first year i would often confront my grandma about this, but she would always make up an excuse and never straight up tell me she moved him because he's so ugly it's an embarrassment to the family eventually i grew tired of her

3.

Joint - grumpsaesthetics and so it begins..

4.

Text - voxiferous i was not fucking ready for this photograph iopele this photo makes the whole thing so much better ... and I cannot stop laughing help I need oxygen

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Entitled Karen Tries To Scam Restaurant Owner, Fails Miserably


Man, oh man, this Karen came in trying to stir up some unnecessary drama from the start. Fortunately, the restaurant owner had his wits about him and ultimately ended up playing Karen like a true boss. Just picturing her face when she realized the very "waiter" she was complaining about was the restaurant owner is enough to make one's heart swell with joy. Check out some more Karen content with the time that a demanding Karen insisted that she worked at the store...

1.

Text - r/TalesFromYourServer u/hicctl • 1y + Join Let me speak to the manager young man, I will have you fired. The owner and me are good friends !!! Long First let me explain a few things here. This is not my story as such, but I got to witness it first hand. A good friend of mine is from a family that owns 3 very successful Italian restaurants (with a pizza oven that uses actual wood, really top of the line). So he learned the business basically from the day he could walk ;) When he was 25 he

2.

Text - So he created a solid business plan, and had his eyes on a prime location. It is 50 meters away from the biggest parking area in the city, with 400 parking spots, where several times a year we have big city fairs, and anybody who wants to go in the park strolls right by it. So his dad said he would finance him but as a credit to be paid back in a timely manner. They agreed on everything, and a year later he opened up. The story takes place about 2 years after they have opened and the plac

3.

Text - rues this relationship with an iron fist. They sat down on the table next to us, and after not even a minute she rudely asked us why she has no menu yet, and to get off our lazy asses. I already wanted to tell her I do not work here, but he winked at me and walked over to their table giving them our menus. I call her EL and my friend just friend. DISCLAIMER this was nearly 15 years ago, so the spoken words are not word for word, but represent what was said. EL: it is about time you get of

4.

Text - EL: About time, did you have to brew it first or what is taking so long. My friends patience is starting to wear thin, but he still stays friendly. Friend : You saw me walk to the bar and make your drinks right away, then return right away. Those beers take a bit to pour correctly,I am sorry, but there is no way I could have brought those to you any faster. EL: We are customers and this is how you talk to us ? Ever heard of the customer is always right ? How can you be so rude to paying c

5.

Text - EL(Interrupting him): SHUT UP ! How dare you !!! I will have you know me and the owner are old friends. I will have your job over this, now get me your manager. Friend : PLEASE I need this job. EL: TOO LATE, you should have thought about this before you treated guests this rude. NOW. GET. ME .THE . MANAGER 1. Friend : right away miss to bring out beer to bring our beer So he went behind the bar and had a short talk to one of the older guys working there. Let us call him OG. Both return to

6.

Text - EL (suddenly playing the sweet old lady, that is so00000 nice): when we came in here, your server sat there with someone and played chess. WE waited and waited, and finally asked nicely if we could have a menu. He rolled his eyes at us and gave us the menu from his table. Then we ordered drinks, and he walked over, made our drinks and then just stood there for a good 10 minutes before he brought out beer. And when I politely asked him to bring out beer he was really rude to me. Since I kn

7.

Text - Friend : of course not, she came..... EL (suddenly all the mask of friendlyness gone, starts screeching): What are you asking him for, i just told you what happened. Are you calling me a liar ? Wait till the owner hears of this. At this point my friend and OG could no longer hold it back and they started laughing. EL : YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY, NEVER EVER HAVE I BEEN SO INSULTED.

8.

Text - Friend : Yea I know, what til the owner hears of this, oh wait the owner already did hear of this. I AM THE OWNER, and I have never seen you in my life, nor have you ever eaten here. You 2 are just trying to scam a free meal out of me, by being impossibly difficult till the server finally snaps or does something wrong, so you can aks for a manager and lie to him about what happened. Now you pay for your beer, and then you go, and do not even think of coming back, you are banned. Wow, I ha

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Life Pro Tips That Are Real Life Cheat Codes


Life is a confusing emotional rollercoaster of just trying to avoid fails and mishaps as often as possible. With that being said, why not take some pro tips that might actually help you hit your stride without having to exert too much effort. For instance, the tip about training pets to respond to fire alarms could literally be life saving one day. 

1.

Text - u/_TuxedoCat_ • 2y A 1 Award LPT : If you are asked to create an account in order to continue browsing a website, hit F12 and click on the dim area, this would select it and you can delete it with DEL key, hit F12 again and resume your browsing. Computers ...

2.

Text - u/rishabhbector • 1y LPT: If you want to learn a new language, figure out the 100 most frequently used words and start with them. Those words make up about 50% of everyday speech, and should be a very solid basis. Miscellaneous

3.

Text - u/z3roTO60 • 13d O O 6 Awards 2019 LPT: if you need somewhere to work/relax with friendly staff, nice AC, plenty of seating, free WiFi, and available all across the US, you're in luck! There are more public libraries in the US than there are Starbucks or McDonalds! And you're under no obligation to buy anything to sit there IFLA Productivity

4.

Text - u/41sa • 2y LPT: If you are given a prepaid debit card as a gift, save it after you spend the money. You can use it to sign up for free trials online without worry of being scammed. Money & Finance

5.

Text - u/AweHellYo • 4mo LPT: If there is anyone at your job you don't like, always take special care not to take vacation at the same time as them. Having toxic/stressful people gone from the office is like a mini vacation by itself that you would miss out on if you are gone. Careers & Work

6.

Text - u/swankyjerboa • 1y LPT If you have to make a presentation in front of a group of people volunteer to be the first one up as everyone else will be so nervous about their own presentation that they won't pay attention to yours and will more than likely forget any mistake or stupid thing that you might do. HOW TO "HIDE BAD NEWS IN YOUR PRESENTATION School & College

7.

Text - u/rlc327 • 1y 1 Award LPT: Keep a separate master resume with ALL previous work experience. When sending out a resume for application, duplicate the file and remove anything that may be irrelevant to the position. You never know when some past experience might become relevant again, and you don't want to forget about it. Careers & Work

8.

Text - u/levelonesc • 1mo O 9 11 Awards LPT: Adopt an adult dog from a shelter if you want a companion but don't have time/ patience to train a puppy. They are already potty trained in most cases and love you all the same. Animals & Pets

9.

Text - u/wreckinitralph • 4mo LPT: When you're sitting at a drive-thru speaker, we can always hear everything - even if you think your interaction is over. Be careful what personal details you reveal to strangers. Social

10.

Text - u/jade_monkey07 • ly LPT: If you like one song by an artist, but don't dig the rest of their stuff. find out who the producer is and see what other work they've done. The producer can play a big role in how the final song turns out. Arts & Culture

11.

Text - u/Jajaninetynine • 1y 1 Award LPT: If your fire alarm goes off, call your pets and give them a treat. Eventually they will come when the alarm goes off, saving you from wasting time looking for pets during an evacuation. Animals & Pets

12.

Text - u/tristan10000 • 1y 1 Award LPT: X percent of Y is equal to Y percent of X. So, if you want to find out what 7% of 50 is, you could instead find out what 50% of 7 is, which is 3.5. This means that 7% of 50 is also equal to 3.5. Miscellaneous

13.

Text - u/uploadking • 1y 1 Award LPT: If you have the unfortunate experience of having to put a pet down, find a vet that will make a house call. Don't let your pet's last moments be somewhere they are afraid of. Animals & Pets

14.

Text - u/Martin_the_Hammer • 1y 1 Award LPT: Whenever you travel abroad bring a new soundtrack for each place you visit, preferably one you have never heard before. In the future, every time you listen to each soundtrack again they will bring you vivid memories of the places you have visited. Traveling

15.

Text - u/MissusMcFeely • 4mo 3 4 Awards LPT: If clothes or towels have a mildew smell, add some plain white vinegar to the washing machine, along with detergent, for the freshest smelling laundry ever. Note: Clothes will NOT smell like vinegar. It is highly diluted as well as going through the rinse cycle. Tried and true. Thanks Grandma! Home & Garden

16.

Text - u/flux_capacitor3 • 1y LPT: when your ISP raises your bill, call in and say “cancel service" to the automated operator. You’ll be sent to their retention team with no waiting on hold. They will usually take $10-20 off your monthly bill for a year. I do this once a year. Money & Finance

17.

Text - u/mellowkey • 11mo 1 Award LPT: When flying, put a tag with your info inside your bag, not just outside. Any tag on the outside can come off. Also, when a bag gets lost, the airline will open it to try to determine who it belongs to. Source: Used to work at Lost Baggage for an airline. Traveling

18.

Text - u/CryptoBasicBrent • 8d § 6 Awards LPT - If you need to wait until your boss is in a good mood to ask for something as simple as time off, you're in a toxic work environment and you need to take steps to exit sooner than later. Careers & Work

19.

Text - u/Professoi Ty 1 Award LPT: Pay Attention to the smell of your home when you come back from a trip - that's what it smells like to guests all the time, you just get used to it. Home & Garden

20.

Text - u/Swoley_Moley • 2y LPT: If you have a guest bedroom in your home, spend a night in it yourself to be sure there are no annoyances and that it is comfortable Home & Garden

21.

Text - u/Kadybaby • 10mo LPT: always assume when you're put on hold that the other person can still hear you. Social

22.

Text - u/[deleted] • 6mo S 1 Award LPT: S is the "skip intro" hotkey on Netflix. A christmas gift from our home to yours. Computers

23.

Text - u/freenarative • 2y 1 Award LPT: if an app asks you to rate it click "yes", wait for your app store to start the load then click back. App stores don't state if you share, so apps can't check BUT it stores the cookie and never asks again. Computers

24.

Text - u/gangbangkang • 11mo 1 Award LPT: When things go bad at a job, good people leave, eventually followed by people who thought they could change things but got buried because too many good people left. Those left are bad people or hostages. The good people are your canary. Careers & Work

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