If your ultimate goal is to hack your way into being far off worse from when you first started, then by all means implement any of these failure-inducing pro tips.
Submitted by:
Sunday, March 12, 2017
Watch This Little Girl Nearly Get Blown Away By Strong Winds
The wind can be a cruel mistress. Sure, we think we've tamed nature's breath with windmills and air conditioning, but it's wrath has no end.
Watch what happens when this little girl triest to open her door during a strong wind. The wind grabs hold of the door and says, "Nope."
And here's the whole dang thing. Fear the wind.
Submitted by: (via NBC4)
Guy Goes Around Asking College Chicks How Long Foreplay Should Last, and Now I'm More Confused Than Ever
So basically what I'm reading here after sifting through these frustratingly wide-ranged answers is that the magical window of time when it comes to foreplay falls somewhere between 5 and 30 minutes. Ummm. Could you ladies make that any more difficult for us to get a read on?
Submitted by: (via StupidCupid)
Billy Eichner Takes Over a Stranger's Phone and, Yup, He's Roasting This Dude
Want to make Tinder more exciting, try having a famous comedian/screamer respond for you.
Billy Eichner of Billy on the Street and Parks and Recreation hijacked a Vanity Fair writer's Tinder and basically roasted the shit out of his Tinder game.
So next time you're swiping life after left, try and remember what Billy Eichner did: Message someone and remind them of the futility of life.
Submitted by: (via Vanity Fair)
Tagged: Billy Eichner , Billy On The Street
This Car Drove Through A Wall and Got Stuck Hanging On The Side of a Building
10 of the Dumbest Things People Have Ever Overheard
Don't allegedly fully functional adults with apparently reasonable amounts of brain activity just say the darndest things when taken out of context? You're bound to hear some pretty damn entertaining things if you take off the headphones next time you're walking around out in public. However, it's doubtful anything will hold a candle to these snapshots of sheer stupidity.
Submitted by:
Grab Your Bowtie and MAGA Hat Because Full Frontal With Samantha Bee Brings You Inside CPAC
Everyone wants to go with CPAC, the Conservative Political Action Conference. It's a chance to check in with conservative poltics, as well as see famed white supremacist and White House chief strategist, finally get to spew whatever hate he's feeling that day.
But if you don't have a bowtie or a Nazi haircut, this is your chance to see what it's all about. And, hey, you'll have a few laughs along the way.
Submitted by: (via Full Frontal with Samantha Bee)
17 Parents Who Have Mastered the Art of Trolling Their Children
Ahh, the joys of parenting. The ability to create a living, breathing, human being just to troll the shit out of them 10 years down the road is one of the most sacred rites of humanity and definitely one of the best perks of making that life choice.
One thing's for sure: These parents are doing it right.
Submitted by:
The Nestie Awards Are Here to Honor the Weirdest and Funniest Shit Caught By Home Surveillence Systems
The unsung heroes of the YouTube video world are finally getting some recognition. The Nestie Awards are finally handing out awards to the funniest video made by home security systems.
Home security systems are running 24/7, so there's plenty of hilarious footage that's just waiting to be awarded. So maybe instead of giving Meryl Streep another goddamn award, they give an award to someone falling through their roof.
The home automation company Nest is picking the winners, and I think I just won my office Nestie pool.
Submitted by:
These 13 Funny Church Signs Count as Going to Church Now, So Enjoy the Rest of Your Sunday!
Guess what? I just talked to the big man, and he said that these checking out these 13 funny church signs actually counts as going to church. Is that awesome?
So enjoy these church signs and also enjoy not spending an eternity in Hell.
Submitted by:
Tagged: church signs , church
Homeless Guy Builds Amazing Pimp Pad Under Freeway
"Thiis is my crib, come check it out bitches!" Homeless bro masterfully made the most out of a shit-coated, rock bottom kind of situation. If a guy living under a freeway can proceed to build a damn pimp pad, then shit, first world problems like having low phone battery while out on a Friday night, or the overpriced indie foods market not having your ritualistic almond croissant -- seem pretty damn, sickeningly petty.
Submitted by: (via Daily Exclusive)
Saturday, March 11, 2017
Science Teacher Dresses Up as Spider-Man to Get Teens to Finally Pay Attention to Him
School sucks, right?
Some nerd with chalk tells you what's what, and it's like, ugh, when am I ever going to use this? So you retreat back to your phone. But what if Spider-Man was your teacher? I bet then you'd straighten up and fly right.
Moises Vazquez, a science teacher from Mexico City, is discovering just that. Apparently, students don't really give a shit when he teaches without a mask on, but as Spider-Man, people are stuck on his lessons. Inspired by an issue of Spider-Man, where the webslinger is a substitute teacher, Vazquez finds that the costume lightens the class mood and gets students more engaged in the lesson. Can't argue that.
I wish my teacher was Spider-Man. :(
Submitted by: (via Great Big Story)
Tagged: teacher , Spider-Man
Wash Off Friday Night and Get Ready For Round Two With These 31 Ponderous Shower Thoughts
Did last night get away from you sometime between that fifth shot of silver Jose Cuervo and the pitcher of Long Island Iced Tea you mindlessly took upon yourself to drink with dangerous aggression? You wake up today feeling / looking like someone pulled you from out a street gutter? Well, leave the past in the past and carpe that diem with these thought-stirring sentiments that could only have been realized within the confines of a shower.
Submitted by:
These 11 People Went on the Realest Vacation I've Ever Seen
Look, if you can't afford a vacation that doesn't mean you can't be the envy of all your friends on Instagram.
With a little ingenuity and some light photoshop skills, you can go anywhere for the low, low price of however much Photoshop costs.
These folks know what's up. Check it out.
Submitted by:
Tagged: photoshop
This Canadian Police Department's Tweets Are Instant Comedic Gold
Always a beautiful thing to see the authorities of the world not taking themselves too seriously; or this police department is entirely oblivious to how naturally ridiculous and hilarious their 'news update tweets' are.
Submitted by:
23 People Who Gave Up Their Careers Answer Whether or Not it Was Worthwhile
Life's full of decisions and forks in the road. 23 people answer whether or not it was worth it when they made the hard choice to give up their careers and if they'd, without fail, make the same decision again.
Submitted by:
32 Times Celebrities Read Mean Tweets About Themselves and They Were Scathingly Accurate
Nothing quite warms the heart like watching a bunch of notoriously egotistical and outta' touch with reality celebrities read 'mean tweets' that unmistakably bring them back down to earth.
Submitted by:
The Daily FAIL: 50 Memes to Start Saturday in the Right Direction
Well, it's finally the weekend. So let's get things started off right. Whether you're nursing a hangover, going to hang out with friends, or are unluckily headed to that Saturday shift, this should help get your day going.
For more hilarity and FAIL be sure to check out our new Pinterest and Instagram.
Submitted by:
20 Employees Share the Dumbest Things They've Ever Heard Customers Utter
These high-maintenance or otherwise impossible customers really shouldn't be allowed out in public. No way in hell the employees themselves are getting paid enough to put up with these kind of rage-inducing, jaw-droppingly brainless situations. Maybe we should just get these poor misguided folk some instruction manuals on how the real world operates.
Submitted by:
Watch These High-Rise Selfie Takers Parkour Themselves Out of the Clutches of a Security Guard
I spend most of my day sitting down. And when I'm not sitting down, I'm thinking about sitting down. Let's just say, that I like to sit. I don't want to change that about myself.
But these guys, make a good argument for not sitting down so much. Primarily, you can escape security by using parkour. This is some really exciting GoPro footage. Can we get these guys in a Spiderman movie or something?
You're going to love this.
Submitted by: (via ViralHog)
Friday, March 10, 2017
Seahawks Punter Jon Ryan Tweets Hilarious Send-Off to Kicker Steven Hauschka, People Can't Even Handle It
Jon Ryan's teammate Steven Hauschka went ahead and decided to sign on with the Buffalo Bills, and let me tell you right now as a Seattle Seahawks fan, this is straight devastating. At least Ryan pulled through with a comedic farewell, and naturally the Twitter reactions to said tweet only served to contribute to the bittersweet joke.
Submitted by:
Jimmy Kimmel Reveals the States With the Most and Least STD Cases
If you're reading this and you happen to hail from Alaska, then you've my sincerest condolences; cause bruh, you apparently live in an STD-ridden state populated by sexually active folk with a staggeringly underdeveloped ability to use protection.
Submitted by: (via Jimmy Kimmel Live)
Traffic-Stopping Beards and Homeless Hairstyles Stole the Show at This HS Hockey Tournament
These Minnesota hockey bros really let themselves go. What are we dealing with here? Did the coaches find these guys huddled around out back of the arena passing around a pipe of crystal, while chugging glue like it's gatorade? All jokes and jabs aside, I'll be the first to concede that many of these dudes are rocking biblical proportions of flow, so that's gotta count for something.
Submitted by:
20 Impressively Crazy Tinder Pickup Lines That You'd Never See Used In Person
I'm fairly confident it could be last call at your nearest college bar that has a wide reaching reputation for over-serving Fratastic boozehounds to the point of adult-diaper-not optional-inebriation, and you still wouldn't witness these pick up lines being slurred and lobbed around the bar at the nearest face. That being said, can honestly say I was pleasantly blown away by the sheer ridiculousness of these Tinderized openers. If only we had the follow ups.
Submitted by:
Cheating Boyfriend Gets Caught By Girlfriend In Stupid Text Exchange, Gets Savagely Destroyed
Ah, good 'ol Spring Break has just about near rolled around. A time to take things south of the border --- lethal amounts of tequila and other illicit substances in tow, to chase down reckless decisions, break things, Snapchat all of it, no ragrets, and all the while do everything within one's perpetual drunken capacity to not get locked up in a Mexican prison cell alongside a Wino that has a biblical case of swampass. Our shitshow couple of the day, clearly failed to keep things together; and unfaithful boyfriend definitely kicked the hornet's nest when he strayed out the boundaries of a faithfulness.
Submitted by:
40 Brutal Flaming Roasts For Your Friday FAIL Fixing
Happy Friday FAILers.
Here's your fixing of some supremely brutal roasts. Because we care.
Per usual, these people volunteered themselves for these brutal roasts on /r/roastme. No innocents were harmed in the making of these barbecues, but some egos were probably a little bruised.
Join us as we revel in the rabid insults these people endured.
Submitted by:
Father of Twin Daughters Loves Scaring the Shit Out of Hotel Guests Shining Style
The last thing you want to hear when staying at a Courtyard by Marriot is "come play with us."
Pretty much anything having to do with The Shining is a hotel no-no. But that's not stopping this dad from sending his twin daughters around to scare the shit out of guests when they stay at hotels.
Love making my girls do this in hotels to shit people up, makes the grief of having twins worthwhile. http://pic.twitter.com/n4spPDHX96
— Wefail (@wefail) March 9, 2017
No, thanks.
In addition to loving the shit out of this, people also think it will scare the shit out of them.
Submitted by:
Tagged: the shining
Girlfriend Baits Ignorant Boyfriend Into Cheating With Kim Kardashian Lookalike
I'll be the first to say that these 'To Catch a Cheater' videos are easily some of the most cringe-inducing if not infuriating (on the part of the poor boyfriends) dating meets temptations experiments to surface on the internet.
The guys in these videos are essentially thrown into the whoreish, scantily-clothed chambers of borderline sexually-volatile situations, instigated by unusually attractive young women. Not always the case on that last part.
Submitted by: (via To Catch a Cheater)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)