Tumblr Thread: Mystified Man's Able To Identify Superheroes

This fun Tumblr thread imagines a world where a man possesses the ability to see people's threat level (as numbers 1-10, with 10 being most dangerous) above their heads. From there, we see a fun scenario created where the guy is able to identify iconic characters like Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, Wonder Woman, and Robin for what they really are. This inspires quite the funny picture. It would be rather confusing to see a whopping 10 above a billionaire's head. 

For some more gold from Tumblr, check out this fun thread that takes a look at the logistics behind Davy Jones' curse. 

Safety Failures That OSHA Would Like To Find And Destroy

Anyone who's ever done an kind of physical work has been tasked by a crappy boss to do some real unsavory garbage. And sometimes we have to ask ourselves if we like our boss enough to risk chopping off a hand so that the job can get done 20 minutes sooner. Yeah, that one is a real thinker. It's almost like people have an innate need to stack unsecured pallets as high as possible. Here are some more misguided safety failures that OSHA would disapprove of.

Guy Loses Virginity to Mutual Friend, Feels Burning Regret Over His Terrible Choices

If it wasn't for some crucial mistakes made in the final minutes of play this would be a massive win for our boy wonder here. Probably can still chalk this one up t a win overall honestly, just as long as other problems don't pop up a little further down the road.

Always wrap it before you tap it so that your escapades don't end up on TIFU.

Driver Uses His Own Car To Slow Down Unconscious Driver

Selfless driver of the year Henry Temmermans noticed a car behind him was out of control when he swooped in and used his own car to slow the driver down. She was described as "unwell" and "presumably unconscious," later to be transported to the hospital with a few broken ribs. Thanks to a guy behind them with a dashcam, we get to see the whole thing unfold.

Entitled Neighbors Don't Like The Way Dad Snow Blows Their Walkway For Free, Get Fined

It's not clear what's going through the minds of people who get angry about having their walk cleared of snow for free, but their lack of nuance or decency didn't help them in the end. Sometimes it's impossible to please people. For another tale of neighbors not exactly getting their own situation, here's the neighbor who demanded a farmer not clear his driveway and got his wish.

Masterful Feats of Low Budget Engineering

Honestly we shouldn't be this impressed by a repurposed pool noodle. And that would be the case if weren't constantly frustrated by the impossible challenge of wanting to learn an arm on the car window while also wanted only a moderate breeze. Honestly it's a problem we thought we'd never seen solved in our lifetimes. Here are some more masterful DIY engineering solutions.

Karen Doesn't Believe Woman Is Blind, Tries Taking Guide Dog

It's gotta be hard enough navigating the world without being able to see, but having random people come up and try to prove that you're not blind? That's a hassle, man. This entitled mom had some strange delusions of what blindness is supposed to look like and went out of her way to get her kid to pet the dog. Amazing. For some more guide dog drama, here's the belligerent HOA Karen who complained about guide dog training.

Incompetent Gas Thieves Seal Their Own Fate

Crime doesn't pay, especially when you don't know what you're doing. This guy didn't even have to resort to bold trickery to get back at his gas-stealing neighbors. He just altered things very slightly so that a less-than-keen eye would screw things up for themselves. For some other fun tales of retribution, here's a dude who got hounded for trivial debt, so he mailed them a dime.

Funny Tweets To Viciously Unleash Upon Boredom

We're all riding on this spinning blue marble, and man, sometimes that gets boring. We just stare at the ceiling, unsure of what to do with ourselves. And then, out of the darkness, there it is: someone's extremely specific opinion on spray cheese. We've found something interesting to cling on to. Something to save us. Funny Tweets to turn the tide of boredom.

Entitled People and Their Unreasonable Demands

Just when you think people might be starting to get reasonable, you get a message from an entitled person whose absurd audacity drives them to call you a scammer for not taking their expired coupon in exchange for your 2010 Honda Civic. Entitled people with their laughable boldness will never give up trying to squeeze some free stuff out of everyone else.

Funny Tweets and Tumblr Gems to Sift Through and Chortle

The internet is an ocean of information, permeated by the odd lobster of absurdity. People are thinking about dumb junk all the time, and they expel that junk as funny tweets and tumblr gems to quote later. There's never been a time with more free-floating observations. One might learn something, but probably not. At least funny tweets and tumblr gems grant strength against boredom.

Lying Brother Tries To Cover Up Fact His Wife Is Breadwinner

In these modern times, it can be pretty up in the air who makes more money in a relationship. This guy went out of his way to make it seem like his wife was just spending all his money, which was absolutely not the case, and a pretty disrespectful way to go about things. What makes it especially strange is that everyone knew the truth anyway. Relationships come with very specific and strange situations, like this dude who lied to his constantly late wife just so she'd arrive on time.

Girl Keeps Stealing Roommate's Raisins, Petty Revenge Ensues

This isn't the first time we've seen an altercation break out between roommates that ultimately ends in a glorious petty revenge, and we doubt it'll be the last time. The girl in this story sounds like she was wildly inconsiderate and devilishly entitled. She had the audacity to steal her roomie's special chocolate covered raisins more than once. Um, talk about some severe boundary issues. Fortunately, the petty revenge seemed like it taught her a lesson. 

Parenting Memes For The Perpetually Stressed

Many of us aren't really even half decent at caring for ourselves, so when you throw a new human being in there, things get real wild real fast. Here are some dad memes that go father than ever before, as well as some extra proof that children are weird and dumb. Don't look at memes too long, your kid might be sticking their head into a big jar of pretzels or something right now.

Entitled Sister-In-Law Steals Baby Name, Freaks Out When Couple Doesn't Care

People generate a striking amount of drama over uncommon baby names, but when this couple's relative went and used the name they had planned, they let her know that it didn't matter to them and that they'd still use the name anyway. Cue a meltdown from sister-in-law who never realized that could be a possibility, and it just gets worse from there.

Entitled Lowballer Doesn't Understand Lowballing

What a classic choosing beggar scenario right here. They want something, they get the something, and then their own blinding entitlement leaves them convinced that they somehow got screwed over. It's fascinating (in a bad way) on some level to watch this kind of interaction so grossly devoid of logic, play itself out. 

Company Messes With Delivery Driver's Tips, Pro Revenge Ensues

It's all about knowing your labor laws. There are a terrible amount of companies out there in the wild that are preying on various employees that haven't read up on their labor laws. Knowledge is power, man. 

Double-Take-Causing Images of Skewed Perspective

With a camera tilt here and well placed cat there, one image can quickly become a double-take inducing image of skewed perspective. Sometimes two items will blend together so well that it takes a minute to realize you're looking at some intriguing perspective.

Absurdly Overpriced Stuff People Have Seen

We all know someone who, against better judgement, will buy into the complete BS of an expensive product, and assume that the high price tag is a legitimate marker of quality. It's sad to see, but when someone spends literally any money on a rock in a bag, that's kind of on them. Here are some products that are getting more expensive and somehow worse, as well as some signs someone is trying way to hard to look rich.

Employee Gets Fired, Takes Essential Program with Them

This factory thought it could get rid of an employee but keep their game-changing program. It looks like they thought too fast. For another story of an employee getting the better of an ungrateful company, here's an ungrateful psycho boss that got instant karma.

Puns Ranging From Untreatable to Highly Repeatable

Puns somehow inhabit a realm of humor that's always walking the tightrope of being mind-blowingly clever or unimaginably dumb, and sometimes that distinction just comes down to how you're feeling at the time. Puns range from incredible to untellable and there's no way of knowing it's going to be good until it's said. There's just sackfuls of puns spilling all over the place.

Dumb Things People Witnessed That Leave Little Hope For Humanity

There are some real dumb idiots out there. We all like to think that just cause we have cars and planes and indoor plumbing that the standards for your average person's grasp on reality is vastly better than say, a dirt-farming medieval peasant. But then you talk to someone for 5 minutes and realize that they don't believe in air. What's worse is the dumb things people say with mystifying confidence.

Mildly Interesting Images To Ponder

There's nothing like some mildly interesting images to mull over while you're going about your day. Both of the bananas pictures in this collection of mildly interesting images are definitely a trip. Also, shout out to the champion seahorse lugging that q tip around. Not sure what that's about. 

Random Tumblr Gems of Resplendent Hilarity

The busy minds of Tumblr users crackle with intrigue at the sight of a new stupid observation or completely ridiculous film theory, and it's absolutely worth it to stand at the window of absurdity and peer in like a leering weirdo. Tumblr gems get the brain blood flowing in a way that's hard to pin down. Don't trip and fall or you'll find yourself tumbling through tumblr gems.

Delectably Aesthetic Images of Satisfying Perfection

There's some intangible satisfaction one gets when seeing an artfully stacked pile of perfectly cut logs or a well-trimmed hedge. Maybe seeing satisfying images of aesthetically pleasing perfection just sparks something in our brains like, "oh wow, in this chaotic world, maybe there can be something stable and consistent, even if it is a stack of carrots or good latte art." Whatever it is, there's just something nice about things fitting perfectly.

Fancy Brickwork To Gawk At And Feel Unskilled Over

We don't really think about bricks. In a world where new buildings are steel and transparent, the brick has become a symbol of rugged pragmatism of days past. But in the right hands, a few bricks can become a highly aesthetic thing of satisfying perfection. They're graceful. Very unlike these "not my job" moments of incompetent construction or these OSHA safety failures.

Stupid and Random Ways People Fell Into Money

It's extremely rare and extremely stupid, but sometimes money finds its way into people's hands for what seems like no reason. One chance encounter or ill-advised risk can land a very lucky few of us with randomly gotten gains. That said, once people have money, they tend to spend that money on the stupidest things.

Frustrating Times People Didn't Understand Basic Stuff

Once you get down to it, it becomes pretty clear why things are in the state they are. We live in a world where on any given day you just might hear someone say the dumbest thing you've ever heard. Things get especially hairy when people have vastly different preconceptions about the nature of reality. What's worse is when people say absurd things in complete seriousness, cause that means their gonna be defensive about their misconceptions.

Absurd Lying Stranger Won't Pay for Rug, Thinks They've Won

Nothing is the same type of annoying as a dumb person who thinks they've just defeated you. Such is this low balling stranger who made the unreasonable demand for this rug, obviously lies about buying a different one, and is so dumb that they don't understand a rhetorical situation and believe that they've caught the seller in a lie. Pretty childish.

Guy Causes $3K Of Damage With $4 Worth Of Ice

Never underestimate the destructive power of a bag of wild ice left to create chaos in the back of your very nice car. This person ended up enduring quite the regrettable situation with a measly bag of ice. Apparently, it ended up resulting in thousands of dollars worth of damage.