Quietest Dishwasher In The World

Unfortunately far too many of us have had our time in the sun with having to deal with miserably loud dishwashers. It can drive one to the brink of literal insanity. However, this dishwasher is out there doing it different. Look at that thing go. 

Tom Waits' Unhinged Press Conference Is Art At Its Finest

In 2008, American singer/songwriter Tom Waits announced a tour with a very peculiar "press conference" video that is one part delicious rambling and four or five parts Tim and Eric sketch. We wished that every musician took a lesson from this and subsequently announced their tours with "inspired" press conferences like this, but for some reason that wasn't in the cards.

TikToker Films Boyfriend Checking Out Girl Right In Front Of Her

Clearly this relationship is rocking all kinds of red flags thanks to this guy's inability to keep his eye's off another girl. He's literally doing it right in front of her. Like? Come on, man. Apparently the relationship did end up caving in on itself. Good for her. Hopefully the guy learned his lesson and gets his act together. 

Tumblr Thread: People's Brains Go Nuts Around Pets

The weirdest thing always seems to happen to our bizarre brains whenever we see a baby or an adorable little animal. We just become senseless, or rather, filled with overwhelming adoration. Maybe you'll end up relating to this Tumblr thread about just how silly we can get around cute animals. For some more gold from the world of Tumblr check out this Tumblr post about a dad who pretended to hate a cat until the real, very wholesome truth came out.

Dad Punishes Son For Calling Him By His First Name

There are absolutely certain things in this crazy life that warrant punishments. And these punishments can be especially necessary when we're growing up and getting the gist of differentiating between right and wrong. With that being said, it sounds like this kid was just downright committed to getting a rise out of their parent. Some folks in the comments section expressed their disapproval over this dad's decision to discipline his son over the fact that his son repeatedly called him by his first name, even after that was established as not being okay. 

Cereal-Flipping Mom Gets Denied Her Obscene Grain Load

There has got to be a better way to earn a living than scamming your local supermarket and inconveniencing everyone in the process. It's like she saw an episode of Ed, Edd n Eddy and was like "Yes. Yes this is the way I will live my life." Anyone who's worked retail has had to deal with their fair share of scheming customers, like this rotten salad lady who got banished from the deli section.

Absolute Units Too Large For This Earth

It's a good thing Absolute Units are so rare, because if they were everywhere, there simply wouldn't be enough space for the rest of us. The multi-pound carrots, giant gems and honkin' horses are testaments to just how big things can get. And one can't help stare and go " Damn, that is some G I R T H."

Reliable Ways To Tell If Someone's A Jerk

We only have a limited time on this earth, and while we don't get to choose a lot of things about our own circumstances, we usually have some amount of power over who we get to spend our time with. Specifically, it's a good idea to know when you're talking to a laughably entitled person who doesn't see other people as equals, or is so self absorbed they just see social situations as opportunities to see how miserable they can end up being. If you fear that this is you, may we interest you in some more personality traits that people can't stand.

Strange And Cursed Images to Pump Up The Weird

Even if we had the context, the double packaged bananas, extra long toilets and refurbished burgers in here still wouldn't make a whole lot of sense. Maybe we don't deserve context. Maybe the world is just doomed to be cursed. Maybe all we can do is sit back with some cursed food and watch it all pass us by like some kind of nonsense-fueled horror parade.

Guy Determined to Get With Crush Is Given Rude Wake Up Call By Best Friend

It's always good to be there for your best mates in their time of need. Sometimes all any of us need is a little push or an optimistic pep talk in order to do that thing we've been waiting to do or make that change we've been looking at making.

We've all given pep talks to our friend and encouraged them to make a move with a crush that they've been too nervous to talk to. To a certain point, when you're the one needing the pep talk, you almost expect your friends to give you exactly that. But we also owe it to ourselves and to our friends to be honest with them, sometimes a pep talk isn't what they need. Sometimes they need a wake up call so that they can snap back to reality.

I'm inclined to say that the poster made the correct call here when he decided to confront his friends behaviour rather than commiserate with him. It's pretty clear that Danny's behavior has crossed a line and he needs to move on and leave Gwen alone.

What's your take on this one? 

Student Doesn't Understand How Mouse Works, Tech Support Nightmare Ensues

You've really got to hand it to the folks that are working tech support in this world. They're on the frontlines of having to deal with all kinds of bullish ignorance and infuriating nonsense. The fact that this student insisted on packing all of the attitude that they did, amidst a tech support professional just trying to help them out is pretty wild. Like, they could've been nice about the whole thing. There was no need for all the rudeness. Keep the tech support train rolling with these IT memes for the people really holding up society as we know it.

Office Lunch Thief Gets Undermined By Crafty Pro Revenge

Anyone who has ever had to deal with a nasty and completely inconsiderate coworker that can't be troubled to respect simple boundaries like not stealing someone's lunch, will appreciate this pro revenge on a whole another level. It sounds like this office lunch thief wasn't going to stop fooling around anytime soon. Thus, the pro revenge was taken. Check out another time a lunch thief got outed by a pro revenge over here.

Employee Denied Database Access, Happily Submits Hundreds Of Tickets

As is the way, if you make a particular task extremely inconvenient and time consuming for someone, and then offer them a convenient solution, they're much more inclined to accept your help. For another fine tale of technological wizardry, here's one where a manager made an employee's life miserable, and ended up getting auto-insulted hundreds of times a day.

Art History Memes For The Highly Cultured Among Us

Why is it that no one thinks the layman can appreciate fine art? We can totally sit through a big long boring art exhibition full of paintings commissioned by Dukes and Lords and all that junk. We can even walk around a gallery, totally stifling our urge to touch the paintings and go "I thought it wasn't completely flat. That must be the brushstrokes." We can absolutely appreciate how light interplays with scenery and we very much relate to any artist who was completely unappreciated in their life only to die penniless and insane. We like art.

UFC Legend Tito Ortiz Makes WWE Debut, Crowd Has No Reaction

There's a legend going around that Tito Ortiz is still waiting there, awkwardly, waiting, just waiting for the crowd to give him something. What a moment, man. No idea what must've been going on in the crowd that day. 

Dude Builds Jet Engine Bicycle, It Works

The Taiwanese bicyclist Wang Nan AKA "Tainan Tony Stark" spent three weeks engineering this fine piece of work. With a small bottle of gas, the thing was able to get 30 seconds of jet propulsion and hit over 80 mph. Local authorities had trouble finding a way to fine him, but ended up citing a law that demands keeping slow moving vehicles in good condition. In the end, he got fined around 6 dollars USD.

Rodney Mullen Tries Out Tricks For Tony Hawk's Underground

Some skaters are able to pull off the kinds of tricks that seem to defy the laws of physics as we understand them. It's like they've made their own agreement with the devil to let them pretty much do whatever they want with the skateboard. As you watch Rodney Mullen bust out his various tricks for Tony Hawk's Underground it almost seems like he's surprised at how good he is. 

TikToker's Husband Proposes With Blooming Onion

I mean, let's just get right to it: if your partner doesn't propose with a blooming (fried?) onion, is it real? Apparently the couple went onto confirm that there was a prior proposal to this one. They just decided to keep the romance in full flow by doing the whole thing over with a blooming onion. Who knows? Maybe this couple has started a whole new TikTok trend. 

Diner Regular Emotionally Implodes Over Correct Eggs Order

Working in a diner can be a particularly tough gig. You're on the frontlines of having to deal with bleary-eyed customers that can oftentimes end up packing zero patience for their orders not showing up at superhuman speeds, and being nothing short of perfect. Well, apparently sometimes the order showing up exactly as it was requested isn't even enough. Take this diner regular and the temper tantrum that she unfortunately ended up pitching. It sounds like Marg was just having one of those days. From there, she ended up being put in her place by another human being who wasn't going to put up with the toxic nonsense. 

Tumblr Story: Dad Pretends To Hate Cat, The Truth Comes Out

The mere image of this dad walking around the house with a lovely cat draped around his shoulder/neck like an actual scarf is enough to make one smile. Now, you factor on top of that the fact that dad insisted on putting on a ridiculous show that he wasn't helplessly in love with the cat? Oh boy, you've got a winner. We're just glad that dad and this cat are actually best friends, after all. Check out some more gold from Tumblr with this Tumblr thread about the big, weird, and empty mansions of rich people.

Wholesome Memes Because Everyone Needs A Nice Break

If you're like us, misanthropes who look at the tub drain and see not only our dreams but also an alarming amount of head hair, it's important to remember to take a break from seeing the world through dookie-colored glasses. That's where wholesome memescan be a good reminder that people are basically good, almost no one is thinking about how much they dislike you at this very moment, and also dogs are nice.

Taxi Driver Insists On Being Rude, Righteous Lockout Ensues

There are far too many cases of taxi drivers being unimaginable pricks to perfectly well meaning human beings, for no reason at all. They're just caught up in that maddening rush to get from point A to point B, and have no time for even considering the fact that many of us are prone toward moving at different paces through this crazy thing called life. Well, this passenger was having none of the attitude being thrown their way by a belligerent taxi driver. To have been able to see the look on the taxi driver's face when he realized that he was locked out would've been a very fulfilling moment. Keep the revenge dramas going with this nuclear revenge story about a company that didn't want to pay their employee their worth, and how it ended up costing them millions.

Entitled People Who Stained The World With Their Absurd Demands

People will find things to complain about. They'll split hairs with surgical precision just to complain about free donuts. They'll make up a bunch of lies to smear a business that didn't serve them 10 minutes after closing time. They'll try to not pay people for completed work and they'll have meltdowns over not getting preferred appointment times. It's a wild world out there, and it's bursting with entitled people in need of a reality check.

Woman Frightens Snooping Neighbor By Opening Door And Causing Her To Fall

Unfortunately, far too many of us have found ourselves confronting the unwanted reality that is realizing that our neighbors are nothing short of complete waking nightmares. Some neighbors try to claim your driveway as their own, while others end up being nothing short of completely nightmarish and downright bizarre individuals. In this case, it sounds like this woman was dealing with nothing short of a nosy neighbor who insisted on not minding her own business. Well, suffice to say, that didn't end up shaking out too well. 

History Memes For Those Enlightened Aficionados Of Time Itself

What do we like about history memes? Is it because we get at least over half of them and that makes us feel smart? You got it, buster. So hop in the way way back machine, set that baby to "before baths were a thing" and enjoy all the wondrous history memes that fall out the back of your unwashed trousers.

Man Accidentally Orders Truck Of Rice, Hilarity Ensues

We all have our days when it feels like the universe itself is rooting against us, and chaos proceeds to break out at a moment's notice. It sounds like this dude's brother-in-law landed himself in some real hot water. If you thought you were having a difficult day just imagine trying to navigate having a truck full of rice show up at your place. Wouldn't be easy, man. Not easy at all. 

Entitled Coworker Gets Her Comeuppance At Office Potluck

Oh boy, oh boy, we love nothing more than to see a shamelessly greedy employee go on to get their rightful comeuppance. It sounds like "Susan the Snack Stealer" had her reality check moment coming at one point or another. To have been a fly on the wall during the moment that Susan got called out though. Must've been something magical. Check out another case of wild entitlement with this Karen grandma who wouldn't take an early appointment, and proceeded to have a full on meltdown.

Neighbor Tells Gramps To Mind His Own Business, Costs Him Most Of His Yard And Car

Oh boy, this neighbor had no idea who they were messing with when they told this Gramps to "mind his own business." Maybe they should've thought that aggressive remark/request through just a bit more. Because, oh boy, the regret must've stung like none other. To have seen the look on the livid neighbor's face when they returned to what must've been an astronomical fine, must've been a thing of pure art. To keep the malicious compliance drama going, check out the time that this nightmare neighbor tried to claim a guy's driveway and then ended up screwing himself out of his own.

People That Know Influencers Share What They're Like In Real Life

When many of us hear the word "influencer" we're prone to brace for an ensuing tidal wave of unwanted situations involving entitlement, bloated egos, and generally disagreeable demeanors. That goes without saying that not all influencers are out there bombarding the world with their ridiculous attitudes. There are some diamonds in the rough. For the most part though, influencers can be a real handful. Maybe these people's stories about their own encounters with influencers will remind you about a time that you had to put up with an influencer's nonsense. To keep the influencer theme going, check out this post about an influencer Karen that demanded free food in exchange for fame.  

George Lucas Explains The Force

Leave it to George Lucas himself to masterfully break down what the infamous "force" is all about. If you ever had any lingering questions about how the force works, Lucas' explanation might be able to provide some clarity on the matter. If you want to keep the Star Wars content rolling, check out this fun Tumblr thread about how Darth Vader is an absolute drama queen.