Wednesday, November 4, 2020

Work Memes to Hide from the Boss


Work. We need to do it to not be hungry and cold, but other than that it's missing some benefits. Depending on their job, most people would rather just sit and be bored. And everyone's attitude at work is a strange combination of trying to do as little as possible while blaming everyone around them for doing as little as possible. It can get rough. At least there are work memes to blow off work steams.

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Snout - Them: "I hope this email finds you well" How the email found me: *hissing noises*

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Cartoon - Whenever I have to talk to anyone at any point during the day u/SIlverisDel me on the outside me on the inside That's it. Big smile. Everybody's happy.

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Photography - I took a bullet in the head for this company. And we thank you for yourservice. corporate in a nutshell

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Cartoon - Me listening to songs about killing people and selling drugs on the way to my regular 9-5 job Iad

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Text - *Works a job I hate just so I can afford to buy alcohol to deal with the job I hate* @StupidResumes In the circle, the circle of life

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Hair - Thank you for your absurd opinion that literally no one here agrees with

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Sky - Me at work today... That can Fuck off! I'm NOT doing that! IG @_Taxo I'm NOT doing shit!!!

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Facial expression - what the cinnamon toast fuck is this

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People in nature - Me searching for who the fuck asked you. ers Lerstock Shotersto

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Goats - When no one believed you. But it turns out you were right

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Cat - When you've got a deep rage burning inside you but you've got to act nice because you're at work...

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Cartoon - Me after a long day of pretending to like people

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Face - YOU'RE NOT MY SUPERVISOR!

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Forehead - [JUDGES JUDILY] CELSION

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Text - It's easy to look sharp when you haven't done any work

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Photo caption - WEIRD HILL TO DIE ON BUT AT LEAST YOU'RE DEAD makeameme.org

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Text - My favorite part of Star Wars was when Darth Vader lost his cool during a staff meeting and started choking a co-worker.

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Cat - I don't know what this cat is going through but I can relate.

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Yoda - Watching your supervisor freak out over something that you mentioned would be a problem months ago @researchgotmelike

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Animated cartoon - deviation from the norm will be punished unless it is exploitable

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Job - Me after graduating college and using my degree to simply send and receive emails 40 hours a week.

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Text - Jahmere @jahmeretyree_ I know my boss sick of me Did you call a customer dumb tonight? No I said "are you dumb" ? I was asking him Do you think that was appropriate? Very much so

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Text - Blowing on the wine in your coffee mug will help convince the rest of the Zoom people that your tea is hot.

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Photo caption - One hour into your shift... I wänna go home. I want a beer. I want an ice cream sandwich. I wanna take a nap. I wanna read a comlc book. I wanna watch Little House on the Prairie. I want a vodka.

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Marsupial - Due to recent events, morning screaming hours have been extended indefinitely aborteddreams aborteddreams

26.

Text - Jack Altman @jaltma World: To have a successful WFH day, start your day with a shower, coffee, go outside, get some exercise. Have a nice morning and treat it like a normal workday. Me: Wakes up 4 minutes before my first call.

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Sky - When everything is going wrong but you're used to it now...

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Cartoon - When they ask you to show the new employee around. Ohumor_me_pink -This is where I come to cry. -Cool.

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Tumblr Thread: Human Befriends Cat That Doesn't Meow


Oh man, this is one of those true gems from the brilliant minds of the Tumblr world. We've got a story about the time that a dude ended up taking a feral cat in, and the beautiful friendship that blossomed from there. 

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Text - sailorcuba Follow the purest form of serotonin is when a cat looks at u and u go like “what?" and it meows at u moderngargoyle Follow like, that is a very unspecific response I still have no idea what you want but l applaud how adorably you meowed all the same, well done moderngargoyle Follow This post led me to reminisce on the nature of cat's meowing, and I have a funny story I befriended a feral cat once who had spent her life in the forest without human

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Text - interaction. was worried about her because she had a paw damaged from an old injury and was emaciated but obviously nursing kittens that were hidden away somewhere. It took me weeks of putting out food and sitting across the yard every evening for her to trust me even a little and when she decided we were friends and she expected dinner every night she started coming to my door and trying to call for me in the evening, but she didn't meow. Why would she? Cats only meow naturally as kitten

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Text - when we first encountered each other in the forest. Except once we were friends she would make this noise while purring and rubbing affectionately against a nearby tree or the porch railing (because she didn't want to touch me yet). This understandably freaked my family members out but I was touched that she had taken the time to find a way to basically yell FUCK OFF in an affectionate way. Fast forward to when she finally trusts me enough to bring her hidden kittens out of the forest to

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Text - they make SO many babies) and ended up having her new babies in this pen. I kept my distance, sitting on the outside once they were born until she seemed comfortable enough to let me come inside. The kittens were a bit wild, hissing viscously at me as soon as they opened their eyes, but they warmed up to me. There were four of them and soon they all wanted to be the center of attention during the twice daily play sessions. l'd be playing with one and another would meow insistently behind

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Text - thinking because one day when they were about a month old I was playing with them and one meowed behind me. I was confused | because I hadn’t realized there was a kitten behind me and when I turned, there wasn't. The only cat there was Artie looking at me really intensely. I turned back around to the kittens and I heard the meow again, I turned back to Artie and responded in the way | always did with the kittens “yes baby?" And she meowed again in an exact imitation of her kittens! After

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Text - | find it endlessly fascinating because before that it had never occurred to me that cats only meow at humans because they were taught by other cats to keep meowing past kittenhood because that's the best way to get a human's attention. Imagine befriending some weird giant with the wrong number of legs that you met in the forest who seems nice enough but doesn't seem to be able to hear you, until your friend explains that all they can understand is fuck off! And l'm a baby give me love! #

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Twitter Thread: Star Wars Characters' Coffee Preferences


As it turns out, coffee seems to exist in the Star Wars universe, and has ben mentioned a few times in various works. @ViWiWrites went and detailed what different character's preferred to drink in the morning, and how they make it, based on their personalities. It has a whole lot of us sympathizing with Darth Vader. For another fun star wars thread, here's a thread on exactly how Darth Vader is the queen of drama.

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French press - Violet Wilson @ViWiWrites Star Wars Characters and how they make their coffee: a thread Obi Wan makes French press coffee and gently uses just the weight of his hand to lower the filter, so that the sediment isn't overly disturbed and the acidity is controlled.

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Product - Kylo Ren uses an Aeropress because like, come on, just LOOK AT IT

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Cup - Rey only drinks gas station coffee with hazelnut creamer and she does not understand why everyone is all up in arms about it

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Text - Poe Dameron uses a Chemex. He has broken four of them this year alone but refuses to switch methods because he likes coffee preparation methods that wear a little scarf

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Text - Rose Tico uses a Moka pot because it's so cute, and she can carry it around in her rucksack moving from camp to camp. BIALETTI Moka Color

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Text - Armitage Hux thinks coffee is for the weak. He leaves his tea bags in the entire time he's drinking it so that it gets all bitter and full of tannins.

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Product - Padmé uses a Japanese cold brew coffee system that her mother gave her because it's as much art as it is a method of preparation.

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Product - Vader likes it when things coordinate. CLACE-DECKED 8:30

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Product - BB8 just cuts to the chase Sundown Naturals PURE Caffeine 200 MG 8 Hour Sustained Releae Energy Support & Mental Focus 0BEADLET CAPSULES DIETARY SU

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Product - Finn has a keurig because Jesus Christ not every thing has to be a beautiful tea ceremony in the morning for crying out loud he just wants a nice cup of coffee to go thank you very much MITE

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Text - He just-I mean the beans are technically "cooked" if you squint

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Product - Han Solo makes cold brew concentrate in a 5 gallon jug and he does NOT dilute it TODDY cold

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Organism - Luke makes matcha tea with the whisk and everything.

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R2-d2 - R2D2 shows up ten minutes late with the iced latte that is the reason he's late and he doesn't even try and hide it

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Product - Leia Organa is fueled entirely by a passion for global democracy and needs no additional stimulants lo

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Product - Ben Solo is going through a lot and recently had to switch to decaf FILR ur HERE Ben BILE SEIRE sut. dbe free 000

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Music Teacher Gets Mad At Deaf Student For Not Hearing, Embarrasses Herself


People just need to be understanding. But alas, sometimes you cross paths with those folks that are the complete opposite. At least this music teacher was humbled when it was all said and done. 

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Text - r/MaliciousCompliance + Join u/NotDaggier • 1y 4 3 1 Music teacher gets mad at me for not being able to hear her (Im deaf) L Hi, my first post on Reddit, so please excuse any formatting mistakes/any other mistakes. Obligatory statement that l'm on mobile yada yada yada TL:DR at the bottom for you lazy cows /s So this happened a couple years ago when I was fresh at high school, in year 7 (I was in the grade for 11 year olds for international peeps). One important thing to note with me is t

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Text - Most of the teachers were pretty understanding about this and would often go out of their way to make sure that I could clearly hear what they were saying (such as seating me towards the front of the class, and standing directly in front of me when addressing the whole class). Except for one teacher who was a hardass about it. She also happened to be a music teacher, she will be known as Ms O. Also this is probably the worst combo because music is also my weakest subject (for obvious reas

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Text - My and my form (we're a pretentious school and like to call the class that we register and go to lessons with our 'form'), are off to our music lesson, and this happens to be a double period (yes we're pretentious and period means lesson) which is about 1 hour and 30 minutes long. Anyway so we start the lesson, and pretty much 2 minutes after we sit down, the batteries in my CI had run flat (remember how I told you earlier that they go flat every 2 days), and so I needed to change them. H

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Text - So Ms L basically asks the whole class to go on the computers, listen to an audio file she'd sent us via email, and then use that as inspiration to digitally create our own piece of music. She also wanted us to show it to the class at the end of the lesson. Now because I didn't want to get into trouble, I raise my hand again to try and ask if I can get the batteries from my bag, but she ignores me again. So l'm like _(9LI don't even like music anyway so no big deal. As a result, I pretty

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Text - After 5 minutes, I get bored and I decide to start talking to my friends (did I mention I can lip read?) And basically let them in on the joke, and we're all trying our hardest to not laugh too hard. Pretty soon, word gets around the class and now they can't wait until the end of the lesson to see what Ms L is going to do. End of the lesson rolls around, and when it's my turn to play my piece of music, and I pretty much sit in silence, and the whole class starts laughing but trying to sti

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Text - Ms L: Honestly, just play your piece of music, it's not that hard. Me: trying to stifle my laughter at this point I can't... Ms L: cuts me off This is how your treat your teachers???? Get out of the class right now! So I get out and pretty much wait there until the lesson is over, I think she was expecting an apology from me (which was never going to happen) because after a couple minutes she pops her head out of the door and barks at me: "YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO RESPECT FOR YOUR TEACHERS,

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Text - At lunchtime, I meet her at the principal's office like she said. Another important thing, is that I'm pretty friendly with the headmaster. She opens the door and the conversation is as follows: Ms L: this guy was giving me an attitude during my lesson and wouldn't listen to me. I would give him a Friday after school detention but I feel that he deserves to get a Saturday detention. Headmaster: turns to me what happened? Me: well my batteries for my CI died and I raised my hand to ask if

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Text - Me: Sir, you know that l'm deaf and that I would never on purposely do that to a teacher. Headmaster; We'll I'm inclined to believe the student here, if you have no proof otherwise, there is nothing to discuss. Ms L then goes extremely red as she realises her mistake and storms out of the office The headmaster gave me a slight smile before ushering me out of the office as well Ever since then, she's never ignored me whenever l've had my hand up :) I know it was extremely Thanks for readin

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Text - TL:DR I'm deaf and need cochlear implants (CI) to hear, batteries in my Cl go flat, and music teacher gets mad at me cuz I didn't do any work cuz I couldn't do/hear anything. Proceeds to embarrass herself in front of the headmaster Edit: wow I didn't realise l'd get this much of a response, thank you so much for the gold and silver and also the general response has been largely positive Edit: stupid spelling mistake in my original edit Edit: spelling mistakes 21.0k 700 1 Share

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Guy Buries Neighbor's Car In Mountain Of Snow


While this must've taken quite a bit of effort, and been very physically draining, it certainly results in quite the beautiful petty revenge. This guy's neighbor sounds like a real inconsiderate piece of work. To have the audacity to watch someone shovel snow out of their parking spot, and then take that very parking spot, is inconceivable!

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Text - r/pettyrevenge + Join u/master_shot • 19h 1 5 2 2 O1 3 5 1 Parking revenge! So a little back story before i get the actual revenge story; i live in a really small and tight street with super limited parking spots, but it is like a unwritten rule that every parks in front of their place not some one elses. Recently this douchbag moved in across the street and he has 4 cars! 3 that just sit around and 1 that he drives daily and he has those junkers parked all over taking other peoples spots

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Text - 3 days ago over night we had a massive snowfall it was up to my knees and im 6'4. I wake up and need to go to the store to buy grocieries so i get a shovel and spend about 30 minutes digging my car out of the parking spot and i showel all the snow out of the spot so its easy for me to get back in my spot with my groceries when i get back, while im doing that the douchbag comes out and leaves and he looks at me while im shoveling snow we evem make eye contact so he clearly saw me clearing

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Text - I waited untill it was about 1 a.m to be sure he was asleep keeping an eye out the entire day to see if he moves his car wich he didnt. So i go out with my showel and i showel all the snow i could find in a massive radius around his car and pack it tight under his car and around it and a massive pile on top of it! Took me about 2-3 hours you could not see his car anymore and i was 100% sure he couldnt drive out of the pile i packed it SUPER tight i go to bed feeling happy with a job well

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Belligerent Goat Picks Fight With Guy


Keep it together, man, it's not worth it! 

Submitted by: (via Queens Of Skills)

Tagged: humor , goats , ridiculous , funny , Video