Monday, October 19, 2020

The Moment People Realized They Were Old


Feeling old is a new prospect for many of us. We tend to feel like ourselves most of the time, and it takes an outside reminder to help show that maybe we're not spring chickens anymore. An ill-timed back-ache or finding your favorite song used in a "throwback" compilation can make aging a too-close reality. To feel a little younger, here are some things that are older than people think.

1.

Text - splig999 386 points · 1 day ago Went to concert. Held up lighter. Everyone else held up cell phone.

2.

Text - nerbovig 36.1k points · 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago 22 3 28 & 2 More Coming around the corner of a department store and seeing my dad come around the corner at the same time. It was a mirror.

3.

Text - Vinny_Lam 30.9k points · 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago 8 & 2 More When I'm signing up for an account on a website, I have to scrollI back pretty far to find my birth year now.

4.

Text - jellybellymom 27.9k points · 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago O 2 3 9 2 & 34 More When I fell down at work and no one laughed. Instead three people came running over to make sure I was ok.

5.

Text - jahvidsanders44 23.5k points 1 day ago 220 2 4 Instead of growing facial hair to look older, I'm shaving it to look younger.

6.

Text - bigbysemotivefinger 23.4k points · 1 day ago S I saw a picture on Facebook of a friend from college and thought, damn he got fat and old. I immediately realized... I also got fat and old.

7.

Text - KushinLos 21.6k points · 2 days ago I used to drive for uber and one night I realized the college girls I picked up could have been my adult daughters

8.

Text - ThisIsToMarkResearch 20.0k points · 1 day ago They played Green Day and The Offspring on the "classic rock" radio station.

9.

Text - Ienjoywearinghats 17.8k points · 1 day a edited 1 day ago I had to explain to someone how we 3 e S 2 & 9 More used to organise meeting up before cell phones became a thing. That and having to use encyclopedias and other books to complete homework. I'm mid 30s. The reactions I was getting, It was like I was explaining how to split an atom using two sporks.

10.

Text - Siknutty 13.6k points · 2 days ago When I find myself grunting and groaning just to bend over to tie my shoes.

11.

Text - abeetzwmoots 13.6k points · 2 days ago When my son could outrun me

12.

Text - tenehemia 11.2k points · 1 day ago When I was in my late 20s I dated a girl who had a daughter. The daughter and I got along great, played a bunch of Katamari together, etc. Years later, that girl and I have long since broken up. I did some volunteer teaching at one of the local alternative schools with my wife. And one of students in the film class we taught was my ex girlfriends daughter, now 18 years old. At some point in your life, whether you have kids or not, you realize you're tech

13.

Text - Honic_Sedgehog 9.6k points · 1 day ago When I overheard my teenage niece and her friends taking the piss out of "things Millennials say."

14.

Text - the_monkey_of_lies 9.6k points · 2 days ago 3 When I went to a music festival and slept in a tent after five or so years of not doing so. My god. I need to get home and take a real shower.

15.

Text - I_hate_traveling 7.3k points · 1 day ago I was playing basketball alone and a bunch of kids smashed a beer bottle on the other side of the court just for fun. I shouted at them, told them to pick up the pieces and warned them not to do that shit ever again. They got scared shirtless and apologized. I had never felt older.

16.

Text - leafsblow 6.7k points · 2 days ago When I mentioned Mr. T to my wife's friend and she had no clue who I was talking about.

17.

Text - RRuruurrr 6.4k points · 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago . I was teaching a class last week and told my audience that they may need to MacGyver a solution if they come upon a certain problem. No one knew what that meant. Because someone asked, it was an EMT refresher course. These are the people you trust with your life!

18.

Text - cooler_user_name 6.1k points · 2 days ago Getting excited over things like a new vacuum, new water heater, or a not plastic silverware tray. Realizing the Lincoln Park album i like is 20 years old. Laughing when someone invites me out, especially if the start of the event is 9 pm.

19.

Text - Toadie9622 5.5k points · 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago 23 When my oldest daughter was in 1st grade, she brought a note home from the teacher, saying that my daughter had misbehaved. I had to sign it and send it back. My daughter was scared and tearful and it suddenly struck me: holy shit - I'm the adult here. I'm the authority figure who a little girl is scared to be in trouble with. To me, I was the same person I was when I was 16.

20.

Text - brownies671 4.5k points · 2 days ago · edited 1 day ago kids born in 2002-2003 are in college now. could've sworn they were always 8

21.

Text - jamhamster 3.4k points · 1 day ago 3 3 a I was at work and had a meeting with an ex Olympic gymnast. She was stunning and had cosmetic surgery to 'enlarge her frontage' She was also wearing quite a low cut top that had metal spikes in the shoulders. All (supposedly) very distracting stuff. My very first thought - 'I bet that jumper makes a noise in the tumble dryer' My second thought - 'Fuck I'm old'

22.

Text - _chrom_ 2.0k points · 1 day ago Today. Eminem is 48 years old

23.

Text - imk 1.9k points · 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago O When I took off my driving glasses and put on my reading glasses for the first time. But the worst one was when I saw a girl in a supermarket near me that looked exactly like a girlfriend I had a long time ago. I was about to go up and say something to her when this older lady grabbed her and said "Kaitlyn come here" and scowled at me. At that moment I realized that the old lady was my ex and the girl was her daughter. That was a low blow.

24.

Text - SocraticMethod24 1.7k points ·1 day ago I grew up watching Friends and remember an episode where Jack Geller (Monica and Ross's dad) talks about having to shave his ear hair. It was a funny, gross moment. I have to do that weekly now.

25.

Text - thatwontfly 1.7k points · 1 day ago When my new doctor looked like Doogie Howser MD. For those that don't know that reference, point proven.

26.

Text - pharmacylaw 1.5k points · 2 days ago When I learned what I've been referring as "pound + xyz" is actually “hashtag + xyz". I still don't know why it is called a hashtag instead of pound tho.

27.

Text - Cormie 1.4k points · 1 day ago S E When a kid said "What's a DVD". Not even VHS...

28.

Text - Red-7134 1.0k points · 1 day ago I was cleaning out the storage room and came across my old Gameboy. Said to myself, "wow, this makes me feel old. It's been like 10 years since this was made." Got curious and googled it. 1989. (ะด)

29.

Text - the_jessence 669 points · 1 day ago e O I loved American Eagle, especially their jeans. Went in one day and saw a t-shirt that said "Totes Amaze." Turned around and exited the store. Haven't been in the store or bought clothes from them since. I'm so old I just buy my clothes from Target.

30.

Text - mboian84 471 points · 1 day ago Teaching a class to soldiers and I mentioned "I joined the military because of 9/11, we all remember where we were when that happened right?" Soldier responds, "I wasn't born yet"

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Guy Predicts Future, Gives Colleague Nervous Breakdown


Man, sometimes you say something, completely kidding, and it ends up manifesting further on down the road. In this case, we can understand why the guy's friend had the initial reaction that he did. The dad had already been through the miraculous, shocking experience that is having twins, only to learn that he's about to have some triplets too. That kind of development will definitely do a number on most anyone. 

1.

Text - r/tifu u/DeathclawTamer • 7d + Join TIFU by giving my colleague a nervous breakdown by predicting the future M Happened 2 weeks ago and concluded this morning Me and my collegaues have a 'good morning' call Mondays where we just have a chat about the weekend, talk about the football, rugby and interesting things we have done. All chat and banter going well when we start to talk about kids. Couple of my colleagues have twins (one has grown up twins, I think 23 and one, let's call him James

2.

Text - Roll on Tuesday and I was scheduled to have a call with James and he wasn't answering his phone. Within 30 mins his boss called me and told me that James will be off for a bit while dealing with some family issues. Cue today when we have our 'good morning' call and James is back on the call. We all ask if he is OK and he replies 'yes but I have some news'. Confused we asked if he wanted to expand on it.

3.

Text - A month ago his wife found out she was pregnant again, 2 weeks ago on the Tuesday morning was her 12 week scan. It apparently never crossed James' mind he could have twins again and went into panic mode after I joked about it on our good morning call. The scan came and it turned out he was having triplets. James went into a panic spiral as you would. He took some time off to get his head around it and then luckily had a week off for holiday to spend with his wife to talk about everything.

4.

Text - He is so happy right now but, rightly so, his initial reaction was to panic thinking about have 5 kids in the house. We are all chipping for him for a 3 seat buggy and so he can buy some baby clothes as he only has baby clothes for 2 children and will need another set for number 3. TL:DR I joked on a call my colleague could have triplets. Next day colleague's wife found out she was having triplets and my colleague went into a panic spiral as he already has nearly 1 year old twins. Edit: A

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Cultures Clash In Canned Chicken Thread


Both American and English food get a bad rep for being over-processed and bland respectively. But honestly if you're looking for noxious cursed food, you can find it just about anywhere. Here's how British and American people looked upon the phenomenon of a whole chicken in a can, as well as some other notorious canned meat products. For some more cultural clash, here's cultures colliding over how to measure time and space.

1.

Food - Francisco Garcia @Ffranciscodgf Always mad to me how Americans talk down British food because we don't do fluffernutters just right like their mommy does, yet this is normal and also somehow legal to them? From the kitchens of Sweet Sue Canned Whole Chicken PLE FAL HOME ST GOOD Fully Cooked >

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3.

Font - Alice Bonda AlicelnBondageLand @BondageLand THAT SOUND 9:48 PM · 2020-10-17 · Twitter Web App

4.

Text - Donna McKevitt - Composer. Fi... ♥ @dlmckevitt Replying to @Ffranciscodgf I remember on a school camping trip we made chicken casserole with about ten of those things. I can still hear the sound as each one was birthed. 1:55 PM · 2020-10-17 · Twitter for iPhone

5.

Text - Alex Garrick-Wright @A_GarrickWright Replying to @Ffranciscodgf I legit made an involuntary noise that was like "Ghhhkukukuk". I did not ask to make that noise and I did not enjoy it. 4:22 PM · 2020-10-17 · Twitter Web App

6.

Text - Hannah @theeyecollector Replying to @Ffranciscodgf I can't believe all these years l've been using fray bentos as the example of worst possible canned food when this existed 3:52 PM · 2020-10-17 · Twitter for iPhone

7.

Text - Ollie @Ollie_Cycles Replying to @theeyecollector and @Ffranciscodgf I'm not sure what dummy said English food is gross, but it's made me remember all the delicious food we had on holiday in the UK a few years ago. Full English breakfasts, toffee pudding, scotch eggs

8.

Text - Myveggietravels @myveggietravels Replying to @Ollie_Cycles @theeyecollector and @Ffranciscodgf Wait till you try Scottish, Welsh and Irish food 12:31 AM · 2020-10-18 · Twitter for Android

9.

Text - Enola Reven @enola_reven Replying to @Ffranciscodgf and @BondageLand One time I bought what ai thought was canned salmon meat and it turned out it was a whole filet. Just folded up and mashed into the can. A whole ass filet, skin, bones and all. 1:00 AM · 2020-10-18 · Twitter for Android

10.

Food - NGREDIENTS: Pork Brains, Milk. Less than 2 perc der, Com Starch, Salt, Sodium Nitrite. ARMOUR A tribion Facts Amount/serving Se 23 oup (1569) Taotal Fat 59 igs can tres 150 %DV AmounbseningS PORK BRAIN 8% Sodium 550mg 23 Sat Fat 2 5 13% Total Carb. 10 3 Cholest. 3500mg 1170% Pr tein 169 IN MILK GRAVY yus DV) are Mtamin A 0% • Vitamin C 10% • Calcian % • 2 arie det Not a significant source of fiber and sugas DISTRIBUT BY The Dlal Corp FOOD DIVISION HOENIX, AZ 85077 SATISFACTION GUAR Questi

11.

Text - Cab Davidson #FBPE @gnomeicide Replying to @theeyecollector and @Ffranciscodgf But Fray Bentos pies are delicious. 12:13 AM · 2020-10-18 · Twitter for Android

12.

Text - Cyclops Dave @davelostdave TEGREEN If you can overcome your pie prejudice, then yes. 1:23 AM · 2020-10-18 · Twitter Web App

13.

Text - Cab Davidson #FBPE @gnomeicide Pie prejudice is a thing? Like in the Jane Austen novel you mean? Pies and Prejudice? 2:03 AM · 2020-10-18 · Twitter for Android

14.

Dish - Kyle Markz @kylemarkz Replying to @Ffranciscodgf and @tom_usher_ 'A salad' in the US of A

15.

Text - Mike Pence's Night Terror @McPetey94 is this before or after someone's chewed it? 3:16 PM · 2020-10-17 · Twitter for Android

16.

Text - Katie KGB @katieisgolden Replying to @Ffranciscodgf American here this is NOT normal, like we're gross but we're not THIS gross 3:06 PM · 2020-10-17 · Twitter for iPhone

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